Yesterday, I walked 1,334 steps/ .50 miles.

Texas A&M will be closed on Tuesday, Jan. 2 for the day of mourning for President Ford. I will pause for a bit to think about President Ford and his family and be grateful for the extension of my holiday.

I was born during the Nixon administration but Gerald Ford was the first U.S. president that I was aware of.

I walked 5,839 steps/ 2.21 miles yesterday.

This week I ran 30.82 miles, burned 3,670.2 calories and weigh 168.2 pounds.

In 2006 I ran a total of 1,047.29 miles and burned 123,533.3 calories.

Tuesday: 6.23 miles in 65:00
Wednesday: 4.32 miles in 45:00
Thursday: 6.20 miles in 65:00
Saturday (in the rain): 14.07 miles in 2:49:00

Not a bad way to end 2006.

Walter got well. Went to work.

It was good luck that Walter was sick, yesterday. A tornado ripped the roof off the pawn shop where he works. Fortunately, no one was hurt. Walter would have been there or even worse in his car when the tornado struck. Please pray that people get their cars repaired quickly and that the damage to the shop is repaired in a timely manner.

I walked 5,041 steps/ 1.91 miles yesterday.

Pickles is back with her foster mom. Isaac and Loki received their Christmas ham bones and are working on them.

Walter is sick. He is resting. He thinks its because of taking too much pain medication on an empty stomach. I made him some breakfast and he took some migraine medicine on a full stomach and he is sleeping. Hopefully, food and rest will do the trick. If not, I'm dragging his butt to the doctor.

The in-laws are coming Sunday afternoon. The house should be mostly clean by then. The rest will just have to be behind closed doors.

Today, I will start scanning all the cartoons that I have drawn this week. By my calculations a cartoon drawn in 2007 will appear on the website in February.

Here is a weird thought on the ex-presidents: Ray Charles and Ronald Reagan died less than a week from each other and Gerald Ford and James Brown died on the same day. Is the life of a soul singer linked to the life of an ex-president? Who will George H.W. Bush, Jimmy Carter and Bill Clinton take with them when they die? Would it be in Aretha Franklin's interests to monitor the health of our former U.S. Presidents?

I walked 6,747 steps/ 2.56 miles yesterday.

Walter has the day off so I'm looking forward to spending some time with him. The house is looking better. I will spend some more time cleaning it today. Drew two cartoons yesterday for a total of six so far this week. I need to start scanning. I'm still working on some clip art. I hope to finish that tonight.

Next year I will be adding content to the website 7 days a week. The cartoons will still be 5 days a week but on Fridays I will be adding different humor content; currently the Betty Crocker Recipe Library; and Saturdays adding new clip art.

The dogs are outside enjoying the weather. Pickles will be going back to her foster mom today. Isaac is filling out. I think the large breed dog food is helping. Loki is as sweet as ever. When Pickles leaves I will give Isaac and Loki their other bones that I bought them for Christmas.

I had a pleasant visit with the family. I'm enjoying my days off. It is a great opportunity to clean the house, get ahead on some cartoons and just go at my own pace.

Things are a bit chaotic as far as the dogs are concerned but I think it will calm down.

I received a talking pedometer as a gift. Yesterday, I walked 9,670 steps/ 3.53 miles. This does not count the 6 mile run I ran yesterday.

Loki's Diary was diary of the day at Dogster. He received a lot of new pup pals and a few rosettes.

I'm going to work on the house some more.

This week I ran 27.65 miles, burned 3,222.5 calories and weigh 169.3 pounds.

Monday: 4.15 miles in 45:00
Wednesday: 3.20 miles in 35:00
Thursday: 4.28 miles in 45:00
Saturday: 16.02 miles in 3:15:00

I have run over 1,000 miles in 2006. 1,016.47 to be exact. There is still one more week in 2006.

My father-in-law is coming over. I need to cook something.

Tomorrow it is scurry, scurry, scurry.

Can this week move any slower? It probably could but I don't want to find out. The students are gone, most of the faculty is gone and I wonder what the heck I'm doing here.

I have been scanning surveys and binging on sweets. I could clean my desk but I would rather do that when I get back next year. At least there is a nice week off.

I think Isaac is a cat in a giant dog suit. He behaves like a cat most of the time. I am fostering a 100 pound cat. He only behaves as a dog when it comes to going on the leash and feeding time. I'm going to increase Isaac's food the rest of this week and next week. He is looking real thin. If he doesn't gain any weight then I will have the vet check him out.

Pickles will be staying with us over the holidays. My father-in-law will be watching all the dogs Christmas Eve and Christmas Day.

I'm really looking forward to the days off between Christmas and New Year's Day. That will probably go quickly.

I've been working on this cartoon gag off and on for months. I've talked to Walter about and from time to time revisit it to make it work. I've been unsuccessful so far. So I turn to the public for help.

The gag is based on the cliche, "Would it kill you to..." For example, a wife says to her husband, "Would it kill you to rinse the dishes before putting them in the dishwasher?" A different way of nagging over somewhat trivial but annoying habits: failing to put the toilet paper on the dispenser, squeezing the toothpaste tube from the middle, pressing the clear button on the microwave after removing something prematurely, etc.

Anyhow, the gag: a woman is at a funeral, she says to a woman sitting next to her, "I asked him if it would kill him to put his dirty socks in the hamper? It did."

A variation on the gag: A doctor says to a woman, "Your husband was killed by putting his dirty socks in the hamper." The woman says, "My God, I had no idea that would really happen."

Another variation: A couple in a doctor's office. The doctor says, "Yes, it would kill him to put his dirty socks in the hamper."

Yet another variation: No dialogue. A woman standing in a doorway, look of shock on her face. Her husband lying dead on the floor, next to the hamper, one hand stuck on the top of the hamper. In his hand a pair of dirty socks. This one is only funny in the context of the previous variations. This one could change into a CSI gag.

Any suggestions? There is some comedy there but I'm having trouble getting to it.

You, the reader also got a glimpse into the gag writing process. My process anyway.

For the record, Walter always places his dirty socks in the hamper.

This past week I ran 33.83 miles, burned 3895.1 calories and weigh 172.5 pounds.

Monday: 4.40 miles in 45:00
Tuesday: 3.52 miles in 35:00
Wednesday: 4.51 miles in 45:00
Saturday: 21.40 miles in 4:43:00 - It was a beautiful day for everything but long distance running. The high temp was 78 degrees.

My Christmas wishes:

• A home for Isaac (check him out at http://www.woodstocktexas.org)
  
• Shorter board meetings (I have a certain amount of control over this. I did not exercise it last night)
  
• A nice long vacation this summer
• A job that does not require getting up so early in the morning (Early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise. - Ben Franklin. @#$%! you! Ben Franklin!)
• A more positive outlook
• Good health, peace and freedom for everyone

I've been listening to "Drive Time Essays 2", a CD featuring various readings from "Interconnections", a publication for lay leaders in Unitarian Universalist churches. I made several copies which is encouraged and permissible by the UUA.

"Interconnections" calls itself a "relentlessly useful publication". The absurdity of Dilbert intersects with the absurdity of liberal religion. Conservative religion is absurd, also. I'm a UU. I'm allowed to say that religion is absurd. I'm even allowed to hold a position of responsibility within an UU church community. My problem is not with religion per se but with inappropriate adverb usage regardless of the theological leanings of said religion.

Most of the readings and Interconnections itself is quite useful in a non-relentless way. Some of the readings do nothing more than point out the inadequacies in my church. It is a great church but damn listening to some of the things that other churches are doing puts a great deal of doubt on that. My church has enough self-esteem issues.

I have listened to 15 of the 18 tracks on this CD. The solution to every problem highlighted in the CD involves various combinations of committees, meetings, potlucks, paid staff, chalice lighting, and social justice projects. Maybe, I'm becoming too cynical for this faith. Maybe, it's my Gen-X soul that is incapable of viewing anything non-ironically. [Insert snide anti-baby boomer tirade here]. Maybe, it's my introversion (Oh, God! more meetings! Hummus and fried chicken, mmmm.) that prevents me from looking at this more positively. Maybe the managerial bullshit at work has become too much to bear and it pisses me off when something that smells similar invades my religious life. Maybe I have read too much Dilbert.

In fairness to the UUA, our congregation can use some of the information and I made several copies of the CD to give out to leaders in the hopes that something on the CD will inspire them or help them. If I really thought the whole thing was useless I would not have made the copies. My view of the CD is colored by my somewhat negative attitude at the moment. I did find one reading especially useful and it has reignited my interest in a project. I want to revisit this project and reading once my term as Board President is over.

More information about licorice can be found at uua.org/leaders.

Dear other drivers in Bryan/ College Station:

I am fully aware that the speed limit on Highway 6 is 70 miles per hour. I apologize for failing to drive at 70 mph or faster this morning on my way to work.

My dear fellow travellers, I have a slight mental defect that affects my driving. I tend to adjust my speed according to the road and weather conditions rather than simply obeying the signs that the highway department has kindly posted.

I know that several of you cannot understand why I would lower my speed when it is foggy and the roads are wet. I like to be in control of my vehicle. I find that control is easier to maintain at lower speeds when driving in foggy and wet conditions. I try my best to maintain control of my vehicle for my safety and the safety of others.

Yes, despite my some of my writings and cartoons indicating otherwise, I do care about people. Fortunately, for you Mr. Nissan driver who tail gated me from University Drive until I exited the highway at Southwest Parkway I possess a good amount of empathy. One perfectly timed tap of my brakes could have spilled that hot coffee all over your nice clothes, nice gray leather interior, windshield and your bare flesh. I could have ruined your day but I chose not to exercise that power. You continued on your merry way oblivious of the power I had over you.

Theologians, philosophers and psychologists will debate what prevented me from hitting those brakes.

This week I ran 30.61 miles, burned 3609.6 calories and weigh 169.8 pounds.

So far this year I have ran 954.99 miles and burned 112745.5 calories. It looks like I will make my goal of running 1,000 miles in one year. Just need to run a little over 15 miles per week for the next three weeks.

Tuesday: 6.10 miles - 65:00
Wednesday: 4.37 miles - 45:00
Thursday: 5.97 miles - 65:00
Saturday: 14.17 miles - 2:50:00

I've been forced to use the Ctrl + Mouse Scroll Wheel to increase the size of the words on my e-mails and websites. I'm getting old or I need to change my contact lenses.

Tomorrow I make merry with my co-workers. Usually, the whole thing is not too painful but it serves as a reminder as to why I am paid to be with these people. No really, they are nice people but I'm not into the whole socializing thing. At least socializing that is not on my terms.

I know, how self-centered to expect that all social activities occur on my terms. Hey, put a nice face on and soldier through it. Sometimes, I even enjoy it.

It's an INFP (or on some Meyers-Briggs tests - ISTJ) thing. The only thing definitive thing from these MBTI (Meyers-Briggs Type Indicator) I've taken is the I. Everything else tends to be about even. One test I scored 100% in the I. The I stands for "I @#$%! hate people". No, it stands for Introvert. My opposite/ arch enemy is E - Extrovert. In the United States the E outnumber the I - 65% to 35%.

I'm told the world needs people of my type. I wonder if I really need the world. Somebody has to deal with these people. Better them than me.

Last week, before the toy drive I ran 18.09 miles, burned 2179.3 calories and weigh 167.8 pounds.

Monday: 5.78 miles in 65:00
Tuesday: 5.81 miles in 65:00
Wednesday: 6.15 miles in 65:00

I've taken day off from work to rest and run errands. I was summoned for jury duty but was excused.

It is finished. At least the order filling part of Radio MASH (http://www.brazosradio.com/mash/). Donations are still coming in. The cash will be used next year, the batteries will be stored for next year and toy donations will go to other groups servicing needy children in the Brazos Valley.

This was one of the best drives that I have worked. This was my 16th Radio MASH. The volunteers were great - Brazos Valley Bombers Bombshells, Girl Scouts, Boy Scouts, Bryan High FFA, Bryan High Air Force JROTC, American Society of Agricultural and Biological Engineers, the ladies from Longhorn Tavern, single volunteers, and other groups that I do not remember. The Bryan-College Station community was quite generous as usual.

Special thanks to the Texas Army National Guard for setting up the tents, testing toys, loading and unloading.

The weather was great. No rain, except on Thursday. It was cold but everyone dressed in layers.

The official count: 3,330 children. All those children will have toys for Christmas thanks to everyone's generosity. Also everyone's hard work and generosity allowed us to finish at a decent hour. Some years have been all nighters or late nighters. Thank you everyone.

There are pictures posted from this years MASH (isn't digital photography great?) at http://www.brazosradio.com/mash/mash2006/ There is even a link to this blog.

In case you are wondering, I'm part of the USS Intangible. We coordinate the back tent operations, shop for toys, call organizations and repair to the best of our ability gently used toys. We are also a Star Trek fan club. The club has been involved with Radio MASH for 16 years.

I just finished the first day of volunteering at Radio MASH Radio MASH is a 100 hour toy drive benefiting the children of Bryan/ College Station and the surrounding area. We have 3,278 children that need toys. So far 628 children have toy orders filled. All 3,278 children will get a toy. The drive accepts new and gently used toys, cash, checks and donations online via PayPal. The PayPal link is at http://www.brazosradio.com/mash/

Information about the toy drive can also be found there as well as pictures.

It was a cold one today. It did not freeze but it still was freakin' cold. Loki and Isaac stayed inside most of the day. Very little destruction was wrought despite two big dogs being left unattended in the house. One fridge magnet and one videotape was destroyed.

Isaac made it to his temp foster's house. He will have lots of other dogs to play with. Loki will spend part of the day with me at Radio MASH - day two.

THIS IS CETI ALPHA SIX!

I've had the urge to say that all day. Not just say it but to say it like Ricardo Monteblan. No reason. I cannot think of a scenario where quoting that bit of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan would make sense.

I could have called my husband and just shouted that but he is at work and his superiors expect him to work during work hours. My superiors are a bit more flexible about that. One of the reasons I don't just quit to find something more fulfilling.

KHAAAAAAAAAAAAN!!

SuddenLink, my ISP, is down. Or at least my home is not getting any service. So no new cartoon. I'll update tonight if the problem is solved.

Tomorrow Radio MASH starts and the temperatures are predicted to go from 70 degrees to 29 degrees in less than 24 hours. A cold front is coming. The roads may ice because of rain. Texans do not do snow or ice well. Texans know this and stay off the road if possible. The transplanted midwesterners make fun of Texans for our inability to drive in icy conditions. The roads become littered with the vehicles of transplanted midwesterners who claim they can drive in icy conditions. It provides entertaining footage for the Texans at home watching TV. That and watching a midwesterner break a sweat after getting a bit of medium salsa on the tongue. OH MY GOD, WHAT'S IN THIS STUFF! A TOMATO?

Thank you transplanted midwesterners for the entertainment and providing a market for mild salsa.

Texans provide entertainment for people from India whenever we taste a bit of their spicy food. I know what it is like to fart fire.

I like eBay. One of the greatest things ever invented. eBay is responsible for a substational portion of family income. eBay is also responsible for a minor annoyance.

Walter and I go to garage sales to find bargains, interesting things and to make fun of people's stuff. Some of the stuff does end up on eBay.

Lately, this conversation has occurred often:

Me: Will you take $X for this?
Seller: No, I can get more than that on eBay!
Me (thinking): Well, then fucking put it on eBay!

If I wanted to pay eBay prices then I would have gone on eBay. It would have saved me the bother of talking to you. Granted, I'm probably going to turn around and sell it on eBay but if you want eBay prices then put it on eBay yourself. Of course, eBay is a gamble whereas I have the cash right now and will haul off the item. No dealing with feedback, shipping, packing and checks clearing. Cash in exchange for item going away. But no, you just have to have eBay value. Well, then get off your lazy ass and fucking put it on eBay yourself. You don't know how? For a percentage of the final sale I'll put it on eBay for you. What? You want all the money? I guess you're screwed. Not only are you not getting my money but you won't get the eBay money because you are too lazy and/or stupid to post a damn auction. The burden of being you must be unbearable.

I visited register.com and found thenfuckingputitonebay.com is available. I think I will purchase the domain, build a site that links to eBay and print business cards with "Well, then fucking put it on eBay" and the url on them.

Would it be overkill to label this post eBay?