Drivel that cannot fit in a single panel comic.

Wednesday, January 31, 2007

A nice Ducks Unlimited t-shirt worn by a student. But something is missing from the design.

The small lettering at the bottom of the design says, "Leaders in Wetlands Conservation"

Two elements missing from the Ducks Unlimited t-shirt.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Local idiot.

Bryan man nabbed in false report case

A Bryan man has been arrested after he reportedly made false police and insurance reports claiming that $25,000 worth of electronics and jewelry had been stolen from his apartment.

Jorge Martinez, 30, faces charges of making a false police report to an officer conducting a criminal investigation.

According to police reports, Martinez listed several large televisions, jewelry, a computer, 340 DVDs, 80 X-box video games, DVD players, a VCR and several other items as stolen.

The report was filed to Bryan police last March and investigators said that they were suspicious from the start. He was taken into custody Saturday.

"I was very alarmed at the exorbitant amount of monetary items listed as stolen in the report," said Detective Jon Agnew, who specializes property and juvenile crime, in a signed affidavit. "I had not investigated any other burglary of a habitation in this high of a price range."

Two days after Martinez filed his original report, police said he called them again, explaining he found more items missing such as a surround sound system and $2,800 worth of sports jerseys. When he arrived at the police station the following day to pick up the police report, he added a 46-inch television worth $2,200 to the list, reports said.

Agnew said that the large amount of money reported stolen from the residence, which is located in an area with mostly low-income housing, was a red flag that the report was fake.

The quantity of valuables taken was another red flag, he said.

"With the amount of items that the defendant stated was stolen, the alleged suspect would have to have a moving truck and several people to help him," Agnew wrote in the affidavit. He added that he interviewed Martinez's neighbors and that no one recalled seeing any suspicious activity.

Agnew reported that he asked Martinez to show receipts for the items, and Martinez told him that he forgot to report that a briefcase that had all of his receipts in it also had been stolen.

According to the reports, Martinez also filed a claim with his renter's insurance. An investigator from the insurance company who shared his findings with police reported that he visited Martinez's house and one of his teenage sons told the investigator that he was unaware of a burglary.

After Agnew requested receipts he began to have trouble contacting Martinez, he said. A warrant was signed for his arrest but he was not located until a traffic stop ten months after the report was originally made.

He was released Saturday on $2,000 bail for the Class A misdemeanor.

• Matthew Watkins' e-mail address is

Monday, January 29, 2007

Police catch teen after his pants fall

COVINGTON, La. - Police said they caught a 16-year-old robbery suspect who previously eluded them after his baggy pants fell down, causing him to stumble as officers chased him.

"We literally caught him with his pants down," Lt. Jack West said.

The teenager, who was not identified because he is a juvenile, is suspected of robbing a man at gunpoint and stealing another man's car after beating him with a brick, West said. The suspect had run away from police several times in recent weeks, he said.

Copied from

Saturday, January 27, 2007

This week I ran 8.21 miles, burned 973.4 calories and weigh 168.5 pounds.

Tuesday: 2.13 miles in 25:00
Thursday: 2.17 miles in 25:00
Saturday: 3 miles in 32:02

I'm doing more weight training. I want to build some muscle.

I've got a cockatiel screaming in my ear and a growling stomach. I need to take care of both problems.

Your results:
You are Robin

The Flash
Wonder Woman
Green Lantern
Iron Man
Young and acrobatic.
You don't mind stepping aside
to give someone else glory.

Click here to take the "Which Superhero am I?" quiz...

Friday, January 26, 2007

What American accent do you have?
Your Result: The Midland

"You have a Midland accent" is just another way of saying "you don't have an accent." You probably are from the Midland (Pennsylvania, southern Ohio, southern Indiana, southern Illinois, and Missouri) but then for all we know you could be from Florida or Charleston or one of those big southern cities like Atlanta or Dallas. You have a good voice for TV and radio.

The West
The Inland North
North Central
The South
The Northeast
What American accent do you have?
Quiz Created on GoToQuiz
I grew up in the suburbs of Dallas and Houston. Never visited any of the states mentioned in the description. I do have more of an accent when I'm tired. Who thinks bag rhymes with vague?

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

This is the cartoon I posted for Tuesday, January 23, 2007. It is about 99.5 - "The Fox" - the classic rock station for Bryan - College Station, Texas, USA.

It took me a long time to find a logo worthy of copying and pasting into this cartoon.

Motley Crue does not belong on the play list of a classic rock station. 80's hair metal does not belong on the play list either.

When it comes to metal - my generation got the shaft. We are pretty much used to that.

Some things do not get better with age. Hair metal got worse because I matured. I cannot even enjoy the nostalgia aspect because like the music, that time of my life pretty much sucked. It sucked 80% of the time.

How to improve 99.5 - "The Fox":

  • No Motley Crue or Hair Metal.
  • Get a local morning show or even better just play the damn music and leave the comedy to Comedy Central.
  • Instead of saying that The Grateful Dead are coming up, just say whether it will be "Truckin'" or "Touch of Gray". That applies to any one or two hit band.
  • No John Cougar Mellencamp or any of his incarnations.
  • More Jethro Tull and Yes (songs from albums besides 90125) and ZZ Top (pre - Eliminator)
The general theme - tone down the 1980's. It was not all bad but it was not rock's best decade.

Monday, January 22, 2007

I registered for the Armadillo Dash.

Went back to the gym today. Forgot how crowded it is in January.

Basic gym etiquette:

  1. Rack your weights
  2. Rack your weights in the correct location
  3. Don't hog the weights. Keep them racked until you are actually using them. You can do the quick weight switch at home but not at the gym. Other people want to use the weights.
  4. Watch where you are standing when socializing. It ruins my form when I have to avoid shoving a 12.5 pound dumbbell up your ass.
  5. Don't lift weights in groups larger than 3. Nobody thinks you're gay if it is just two of you lifting weights. I appreciate the offer to work in but do you really want to remove 500 pounds of weight just to accommodate me?
  6. If you are gone for more than 5 minutes don't be surprised to find some plates removed and someone else using the equipment.
  7. Don't position your body in such a way that it blocks both water fountains. Scoot your ass over.
  8. Wipe. This advice works outside the gym as well.
  9. Loud grunting and screaming. This is a co-ed gym. Some of the female members have given birth. None of them screamed and grunted as loudly.
  10. One works up quite a sweat but nobody should not smell you before they see you and it should not linger more than 2 minutes after you have left.
  11. Rack your weights.

Sunday, January 21, 2007

The sun! The sun! It came out today! The sun appeared after a week. Tomorrow it will be cloudy again.

This week I ran 26.2 miles, burned 2,270 calories and weigh 170 pounds. I ran all 26.2 miles on Sunday in 5:30:58. This week I walked 26,926 steps/ 11.9 miles. I was rather sedentary this past week with recovery and being stuck in the house because of the weather.

It looks like it will be a busy semester for me. It will make work more enjoyable.

Tomorrow I start training for my half marathon.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Walked 2,168 steps/ .95 miles.

Texas A&M came to their senses and gave non-essential personnel the day off today. Tomorrow, normal operating hours resume along with classes. This assumes that the weather behaves as predicted.

I have a bit of cabin fever and I do want to get the chaos of the first day of classes out of the way.

Waking up early will be hard to do.

I'm not sleepy at all but will go to bed and read until I become tired.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Texas A&M offices will open at noon. The students will go to classes at the same time. That is the current status. It could change. At least I can sleep in.

I walked 2,878 steps/ 1.27 miles.

My church canceled the showing of "An Inconvenient Truth" because of the freezing conditions. Irony on a silver platter. Yes, I do believe that humans are changing the climate but I still find humor in the cancellation of a movie about global warming because of freezing conditions. My generation thrives on irony.

The movie will be rescheduled for February.

I'll see what tomorrow brings. Maybe officials will change their mind again.

It is okay to change a position based on new data.

Monday, January 15, 2007

Texas A&M is closed tomorrow because of icy conditions. There is ice on the trees.

I'm still a little sore from the race but I can move like a normal person instead of like "The Old Man" that Tim Conway used to play on the Carol Burnett Show.

The 2007 Chevron Houston Marathon was my best race so far. Made a personal record and according to my graphic results ran my fastest pace between miles 13 and 18. Ran the first 10K a bit slow but picked up the pace after that. I felt good most of the way. Had a scary moment with one of my knees while running down an underpass toward mile 24 but it passed. Pushed a bit harder starting at mile 25 and then picked it up a bit more when a spectator told me that I was 3 minutes from the finish. I did not do the .2 sprint. Too tired.

I was great seeing a large crowd cheering me on as I ran toward the finish. Houston puts on a great race and the spectators are there until the end cheering on every last runner. If you have a chance to run the half or full marathon in Houston, do it. Some people waiting for a car at the hotel cheered for me when I got out of my car wearing my medal. The Houston marathon has been voted as the marathon with the friendliest spectators by Runner's World. That is important when you are not very speedy. I'm grateful to all the people who cheered me on and to my husband for his support.

At the Expo on Saturday, I bought a new sports bra at the Under Armor booth. I've used other Under Armor products before and they have performed very well. I was looking at the bras and I noticed the tags on one rack said "D Support". D Support? A company is acknowledging the existence of women with tits who like to participate in high impact sports? Wow.

I tried one on and it fit very well in the dressing room. Did a bit of jogging in place and it seemed to work well so I bought it. I talked to the sales girl a bit. Thanked her for selling this bra. She mentioned that it was the best selling item at the Expo. It seems that Under Armor discovered a demand for high impact sports bras for women with substantial breasts and decided to make a product.

I ran the marathon wearing this bra and it performed great. I put on my usual layer of Body Glide on my skin. I did not feel the bra, I did not hear flesh slap together, did not feel my tits bouncing all over and when I took off the bra when I got back to my hotel, the only marks on my skin were the usual marks from just wearing clothes that go away after an hour. Not a single burn or blister. My regular bras couldn't do that even with lots of Body Glide. This Under Armor bra worked great during some extreme high impact conditions - 5 and a half hours of running on pavement. Now that this product is available it will save some wear and tear on my other bras.

I did not have any serious injuries - just an odd blister on my middle right toe.

My next race is the First Annual Armadillo Dash - a half marathon in College Station on March 4. I'm going to try to run a bit faster than my marathon pace and finish this in 2 and an half hours or less.

Right now, Loki is producing enough gas to power a city block.

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Just got back from the Chevron Houston Marathon. Here are the unofficial results:
Start 7:05:02 CST
10K: 1:20:37
Half: 2:46:26
30K: 3:45:01
Finish: 5:30:58
Chip Time: 5:30:58
Clock: 5:36:46

The U.S. Half Marathon record was smashed by Ryan Hall - 59:43 - This guy ran 13.1 miles in fifty-nine minutes and forty-three seconds. Wow! He trains at high altitude and then comes to a race that is a few feet above sea level.

I'm going to lay down now.

Friday, January 12, 2007

Walked 10,906 steps/ 4.82 miles.

Ran 11.47 miles, burned 1,319.9 calories.

Monday: 3.87 miles in 45:00
Wednesday: 3.05 miles in 35:00
Friday: 4.10 miles in 45:00

Off to the big race.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Walked 6,839 steps/ 3.04 miles.

Please let the thunderstorm stall until after the race.

I once took Zoloft for a mild case of OCD. Actually, it was not quite OCD. My symptoms did not fit 100% neatly into any category, Obsessive-compulsive disorder was the closest. Not fitting into something neatly sums up my whole life.

Anyway, I wasn't into therapy so the doctor prescribed pills. 2001 was the last time I took any Zoloft. The results of that last dose were a bit weird.

I still have a prescription bottle with half a pill in it in one of my desk drawers at work. The date on the bottle is 1/18/1999. I have changed offices twice and desks three times and I still keep that 1/2 Zoloft pill.

I doubt it would have any effect if I took the pill.

Running has alleviated 99% of the symptoms that led me to seek professional help.

I still obsess over a few things but it is not life disrupting. My original symptoms were not life disrupting just very disturbing and annoying to me.

Goofy stuff that I obsess about:

  • The bone count on Loki's Dogster Page The bones are up for a limited time, I'm trying to keep it over 70 but it may be a losing battle unless others pitch in.
  • Counting. A momentary glance at this blog would make that abundantly clear. A pedometer might not be the best present for someone with obsessive tendencies. I keep my running miles separate from my walking steps/ miles. I keep two spreadsheets to keep records of all this. I have altered my life slightly in order to elevate the number of steps I take. I received two pedometers for Christmas. Fortunately, I haven't reached the point of wearing both at the same time. Maybe I keep that 1/2 Zoloft in case I reach that point.
  • Poisoning fish with discarded anti-depressants
  • Worst case scenarios about peak-oil
  • The exact location of Linda Lavin
That last one is a joke but I do think about her from time to time and hopefully she gains a small amount of comfort knowing that some stranger is thinking about her ocassionally.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

Walked 9,120 steps/ 4.03 miles. A new record for me.

Got home early and let the dogs play in the backyard. They ran and tired themselves out very quickly.

I wish Blogger would stop completing my words when I add labels to my posts. On the plus side, I am forced to expand my vocabulary.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Walked 7,310 steps/ 3.23 miles.

Received my entry confirmation card for the Chevron Houston Marathon. Thunderstorms are being predicted for Saturday and Sunday. I hope the weather improves on Sunday. This race has never been canceled in its 35 year history.

If the local classic rock station is going to play the chatter of a bunch of unfunny hacks during the morning drive, they could at least use local unfunny hacks rather than outsourcing it to North Carolina. If the station continues to outsource at least outsource to India. At least I can enjoy listening to the lilt of the Indian sub-continental accent.

My Death Forecast

It is estimated that you will die at the age of 95 Years Old.

Find your own death forecast:

Note: This is an estimate using scientific data obtained from dozens of health studies. But, keep in mind it is based on averages, and you may live many years longer than what is predicted or you may get hit by a bus and die tomorrow. Also, at some point in the future you might change your lifestyle to be more or less healthy, which would make a big difference in your estimated lifespan.

Monday, January 08, 2007

Walked 8,204 steps/ 3.62 miles.

Looks like I can make it through a full work week.

Walter went to the doctor and was given some strong medicine and antibiotics. I hope I don't catch what he has. I do not need to be sick before the race.

I cooked some fish for dinner. Lemon herb catfish. It turned out well.

It is way past my bedtime.

Sunday, January 07, 2007

Walked 3,668 steps/ 1.62 miles. Yesterday, walked 4,783 steps/ 2.11 miles.

Isaac attempted to be a lap dog. He slept with his head and front legs in my lap. He had trouble sleeping while sitting up. He sheds a lot. Still, he is a sweet dog. He would make someone a great pet.

Time to watch Adult Swim.

Saturday, January 06, 2007

Yesterday walked 4,914 steps/ 2.17 miles.

This week ran 23.73 miles, burned 2,907.3 calories and weigh 167.7 pounds.

Monday: 6.33 miles in 65:00
Wednesday: 3.37 miles in 35:00
Thursday: 6.00 miles in 65:00
Saturday: 8.03 miles in 1:33:00

Next week is the big race. The Chevron Houston Marathon. You can sign up for Athlete Alerts to receive e-mails or text messages on my progress. My last name is Causey, first name Linda. I'm entered in the Marathon.

No updates next Saturday and Sunday.

Friday, January 05, 2007

Two of the joys of producing a somewhat funny but not brilliant web comic is the lack of death threats and not pissing off a lot of people when real life intrudes upon updates.

I've been asked to kill myself but I've not irritated anyone to the point of them mustering the time and energy to do the job themselves or put down the money to hire someone to kill me. Just a command and a hope that I would obey that command.

A small part of my life is based on a similar hope. I send my commands telepathically. So far it has not worked. The woman using the treadmill next me never shut up, the woman with several noisy children did not kill them, and no one fully paid attention the words coming out of their mouths. No one thought for an entire minute.

As for real life intruding upon updates. Hey, Ces! When will there be new Medium Large? I know that paying work and other things take precedence over a free web comic but what about my needs? I need to be reminded that there are people who draw better and are funnier and that I will never achieve that level of wit. Also, I could use the laugh.

Part of me knows that I can do better but another part of me wonders if this is my best. It is the second part that bothers me. I have a reached some limit? I should focus on the first part and take action.

Some think I should turn it over to Jesus. At least in Jesus I would be content in my bit above averageness. At least that is the theory. After all, God has a plan and place for everyone and maybe his plan needs a somewhat mediocre web comic and a person to do a dead-end, although well-compensated, job to fully function.

Actually, the theory is that Jesus will magically make you a better person without any effort on your part. At least, that is how I've observed some self-proclaimed Christians act. They don't try.

This whole line of thinking is why I don't fully believe in an anthropomorphic, personal god. I hold on to the belief in an anthropomorphic, personal god for comedic purposes. It is too rich a mine to completely walk away from.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Walked 6,789 steps/ 2.94 miles.

Right now the dogs are demanding attention. It is hard to type when a dog is using his nose to move your hands from the keyboard. Having two dogs makes typing one handed impossible. I have resorted to using my elbows to pet the dogs.

The second day of waking early was harder than the first. I was dozing by 7:30 am. I found I do better with more protein for breakfast.

At least it was just a 3 day work week.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Walked 8,151 steps/ 3.34 miles.

I finally finished reading the Tibetan Book of the Dead. Next, the Tao De Ching.

The first day at work went smoothly. The phone did not ring.

I'm going to bed. I cannot stay up much longer.

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Walked 4,620 steps/ 1.78 miles.

I tried the Body Flow class instead of my usual workout. I liked the class but it is scheduled at a bad time for me. I was able to attend this class because of the day off.

I'm off to bed and will see how long it takes me to readjust to waking up so @#$%! early.

I'm almost finished with the Tibetan Book of the Dead!

Walked 6,228 steps/ 2.36 miles

Tomorrow, I go back to work. I enjoyed the opportunity to draw extra cartoons and do a bit of extra housework. I enjoyed sleeping in and doing things at my pace. I think I can go back to work and be productive.

I've been receiving quite of few of these so I decided to bring back goofy spam subject lines/ Zen koans.

But that was in my money, was a day, and the children which
us, the twilight, Even When he was fulfilled and put off the boards
If we had no light is that have erred, in chariots, and should not there
Salah. And broth of the and took arose, was, is

Monday, January 01, 2007

Walked 4,764 steps/ 1.80 miles.

I've started a new update schedule. New content will be added to the website 7 days a week.
Sunday: Cartoon
Monday: Cartoon
Tuesday: Cartoon
Wednesday: Cartoon
Thursday: Cartoon
Friday: New recipe from the 1971 Betty Crocker Recipe Library.
Saturday: New clip art

Of course, there is always the blog which will be updated at somewhat frequent and irregular intervals.