I might have to try that.
Send the son-in-law's mother up the ladder. Ed Crankshaft at his finest. Wonder what threats he used to get her up that ladder?
Did Grant Wood have any idea that his painting would become one of the most parodied?
Just one?
You go Andrew! Let your flag fly!
As for Barney Google, I could not find the answer on the interwebs but the interwebs came to me and provided an answer. I need to try this for other trivial questions.
Today is my mother's birthday and this cartoon appeared in today's online Houston Chronicle. My mother does not own dogs or roller skates. I found it humorous because of the lady's name and the silliness.
Leroy you are a clever one but Loretta will not appreciate it.
I give up following the background art in Mary Worth even though it is more interesting than this plot.
Foam, pillows and duct tape.Listening to my Julie London channel on Pandora wondering how many versions of "Hello Dolly" I will hear today.
I have gained greater peace of mind when I have given up the need to be right about minor things.
Day 31 - one full month of Mary Worthless Mary Worth. Drew, use caution when pressing your hand into your face. You're distorting your face.
How to make the Vera hallucinations stop? Drew, you could make it to Nevada in about 8 hours and enjoy the services provided by one of the legal brothels. It may not heal the heartache but it will provide a distraction for you and the readers. Badly drawn sex has to be more interesting than this plot. Or move this thing indoors so that readers can at least look at some shifting backgrounds.
Come on, Mary Lou, quickly straighten out one leg and your problems will disappear.
The sun shining through my window and brightening my office prevents me from getting too depressed about the fact that I have brain space devoted to the names of Sonya Hobbes' children. Oh, god, I know Momma's full name!
Cats dominated today's comics (excluding the cat-oriented strips, 9 comics featured cats). Two dealt with using cats as tools.
I have lots of recipes from SparkPeople in my e-mail archives that I have not tried. One could probably fit the complete works of Shakespeare in that amount of space.
Went to the dentist today. Got a clean bill of dental health. My blood pressure is 104/51 and pulse 54. Apparently, my dentist has hired someone to converse with while poking around in my mouth. Nothing like inane conversation to make the dental experience more pleasant.
Mary Worthless Mary Worth: Day 24. Who knew a kiss could mean so much? Why does every woman in Santa Royale have blonde hair? The woman that suddenly appears in panel two is a vampire. That is why she can move so quickly.
This gag first appeared in Ben Franklin's Poor Richard's Almanack.
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I will be voting in the Democratic primary. Texans can vote in either primary regardless of party affliation but can't vote in both. I might go to the precinct meeting after the polls close (sort of a caucus - Texas is a hybrid primary/ caucus state). The last one I went to was in 1988 to support Pat Robertson. I was 19. Call it a youthful indiscretion.
From what I observed from that experience in 1988 the candidate with the best organization (people with knowledge of the rules) will have the most impact at these meetings. I don't know the rules or fully understand how these meetings operate but I should go to at least try to have my voice heard.
In 1988, a lone Bush supporter used a procedural tactic to shut out the Robertson supporters. All the delegates from that precinct went to Bush. More Robertson supporters attended the meeting but none of us knew how to work this thing. All that we were told is that this meeting was important and that we should go. We were all enthusiastic, passionate and inspired but very niave.
A week after the precinct meeting a guy walked up to me in the library. He attended that meeting and his mother was the knowledgable Bush supporter. He apologized to me for how his mother behaved and felt that the tactic his mother used was quite underhanded. He was also 19. I think he may have been hurt more than I was. I got over the incident and ended up voting for Bush in the general election.
By the time the primaries happen in Texas, I will have just celebrated my 39th birthday. Texas will be critical in determining who will get the nomination. I don't want Clinton to have it. Some reasons ideological but mostly for emotional reasons. I would like to participate in a general election at least once in my lifetime and not see the Bush or Clinton name on the ballot. I would like my nephew to continue his recently started adult life without a Clinton or Bush in the White House. I still want to live in this country regardless of whoever is elected and I can live with an Obama presidency more than a Clinton presidency. If Obama turns out to be an ineffective president at least he will speak to my higher ideals instead of my base fears. The republic had survived ineffective presidents, I can survive an ineffective president.
The precinct meeting; I've never attended a Democratic one. I worry about a repeat of 1988 happening across the state. I should learn the procedures as fast as I can and hope that I can make a difference.
Will King Features please hire someone to check the art continuity between the panels of Mary Worth? This will leave me nothing to gripe about but I'm willing to make the sacrifice. Is that Professor Cameron's more mellow twin brother? Can Giella draw a beard and mustache on the same face?
Yo Mama's so fat that time slows down around her!
I make similar sloshing noises when I go for a long run. The noises come from my water bottle. Sometimes I hear slapping noises but I won't tell you where those come from.
Creepy!
I look forward to receiving Trick or Treaters. Walter has decorated the house and I carved two cool Jack O'Lanterns. One of the Jack O'Lanterns went to church because it has a flaming chalice design carved into it. I will post pictures.
After Halloween, the flaming chalice Jack O'Lantern will become a major flaming chalice.
I'm sure people in that line of work refer to themselves as cheese slicers. Machines probably do that kind of thing but someone has to run the cheese slicing machine. I bet the person who runs the machine has heard every cheese cutting joke there is. After 38 years on this planet I still giggle at "cut the cheese" jokes so maybe the cheese slicing machine operator really enjoys his/her job and loves to tell people that he/she cuts the cheese for a living. I would.
On the topic of UU classism and humor - would the hypothetical cheese slicing machine operator feel welcome in our churches and would we laugh at the cheese cutting jokes?
Great parody of Family Circus and playing with a semi-regular character.
The Egg McMuffin. I'm old enough to remember a world without the Chicken McNugget. I was in high school when the McNugget was introduced. I also worked at a McDonald's and know what a Chicken McNugget would turn into once it has passed its freshness time. It would turn into a briquette (a McBriquettte) when thrown with some velocity would leave a nasty bruise. It was unnatural the way the McNuggets would be fine at 19 minutes, 59 seconds but then suddenly turn into these little bricks at exactly 20 minutes. I ate and still eat McDonald's food but the short shelf life (7 minutes for a burger to 1 hour for a pie) of the food really bothered me during the time I worked at McD's.
Now that's some green living I can get behind.
Letters have appeared in the local paper complaining about large dogs on the loose. The letters tend to be hysterical in tone and call for a breed ban (Rottweiler, Pit Bull). The large dogs do not bother me. Most owners of large dogs in my neighborhood demonstrate responsibility by keeping their dogs in the backyard or restrained in some way. They follow the leash laws. The people who need reminding of leash laws are the owners of toy breeds. Having a little dog nipping at your ankles while running is quite annoying. I need to write a letter to the editor about that.
Poor Spot. I wish I lived on Ballard Street. A people who have a facade of normality but yet unafraid to display their goofiness.
I thought of Ms. Theologian when I saw this cartoon. I'm living my dream - sitting in a cold office and recording a video about elk calls. I get the edit the video into smaller chunks once I have captured the whole thing. Elk calls are annoying. Trust me on this.
A cool part of this job is my computer is powerful enough to allow me to capture a video and do other things. I do have my own office with full walls and a window. If I had to do aspects of this job in a cube farm my co-workers would have legitimate grounds to beat me. Seriously, elk calls are fucking annoying. Yes, I have the volume turned down low. I don't have it completely off so that I can hear when the video ends.
F Minus illustrates the future. Eventually, all bar stool will be shaped that way.
TJ has other facial expressions!
Call an ambulance! We have a suicidal person on the premises!
Frank looks like Jimmy Carter.
This is a rather simple explanation of Universalism. I don't think Universalists believed everyone automatically got into heaven but they did not believe in the automatic condemnation of humanity. The entrance requirements are not as strict in Universalism. God is just too loving to condemn for eternity simply because a person failed to embrace or was ignorant of a certain idea.
I did not update my cartoon last night because of a thunder storm and I was a bit tired from doing speed work last night. In lieu of my cartoon here are some other people's cartoons.
Rhymes with Orange gives us a slightly surrealistic pun. The older generation is familiar with nose rings just not used to seeing them on Americans.
The artist has captured the essence of cat.
Holy crap! Those are big flys.
Another slightly surrealistic pun.
Your daughter's needs are beyond what the public school system can offer. It's time to consider alternatives.
Packing them in like sardines. The lady in the background is drinking some kind of potion that magically brings you closer to the objects in the foreground.
Had to include this one because of the department where I work.
You're plugger if you are retarded. Usually, the driver is out of the vehicle when locking the car and setting off the quick honk.
Your honor, that's when I shot her. I got tired of her misinterpreting my intentions. Combine this with yesterday's comic, I don't think a jury would convict Stanley.
Jeffy is a little too into this pirate game. Billy and Dolly's blank expression scares me.
A good question in the last panel. The answer, in most cases, is no.
Roger was helping rock the baby to sleep by reading Shirley Jackson's, "The Lottery" and adding some elements to make the story more interesting for the baby to hear.
Further down the rabbit hole of Ruthie's madness.
I've added Popeye to my comics list because of the Comics Curmudgeon. The storyline has become quite insane. I forgot to save today's Popeye with its inappropriate sound effect.
