Health care dilemma

Who can resist the siren call of the internets. I make web pages and I cannot resist. The great blessing of the Internet: it looks like work.

Its call is really powerful because I'm in a different office filling in for a co-worker. Fortunately, I memorized all my favorite URLs and passwords. I can access others via links to ones that I know.

The situation with the co-worker has caused me to reconsider my health care plan. That and other incidents. Getting a diagnosis is bit of a Herculean task. My problem is relatively minor and irritating, a rash that appears on my arms and legs from time to time, but my co-worker's is quite serious and it took a long time to get the diagnosis.

Health care plan enrollment occurs in July and we get the literature in May. This will give us time to look at how we actually use medical services and see if there is an option that would better suit our needs.

I hope the election of Barack Obama will put to rest McCain's proposal to tax health benefits as income. With my health benefits added to income I end up in a higher tax bracket.

Considering the large amount that me and my employer pay for health insurance for me and Walter (about $10,000 per year combined) I think I deserve more than 15 minutes of my doctor's time and a test to see what the hell this rash really is. After paying $50, twice, plus time for stronger hydro cortisone cream, I wonder what the hell all that money that comes out of my paycheck and my employer pays, pays for?

I wonder if my family doctor just kind of lazy or overworked. A few years ago, I did receive some testing for something by a substitute doctor, it turned out to be nothing serious but now there is a good baseline for my heart in my medical records. My regular doctor said he would not have preformed the tests based on my description of my symptoms. This really concerned me after reading about how heart attacks behave differently in women and that younger women in particular have trouble convincing doctors to run the tests or consider a heart attack.

I guess I should be grateful for what I have but screw that attitude - crap is crap regardless of what others don't have.

We are not bonding

I've been on the receiving end of these kinds of conversations way too often. Mostly with women to whom I cannot tell to shut up without dealing with a lot of drama. If one utters out loud the words, "blah blah blah" several times in the course of a conversation that should indicate that one really has nothing to say. Conversation is the wrong word because that implies the involvement of at least two people. What is the word for one person talking and another person sitting there suffering through the sounds being jammed into their ears and their brain cells killing themselves to escape the pain?

I'm not sure if it's worth suffering just for some bit of kindness.
The species is cockatiel self-image. The bird's actual size is about 10 inches but in its mind its size is 10 feet. Rare for it to appear outdoors.
We have background continuity but not foreground continuity. It should take Terry Bryson another week to help Toby make the connection. Try percussive stimulation, Terry.
I love Earl the vacuum cleaner boy.
Why does Sally feel compelled to force Ted to try to make friends at the office? He should be on good terms, cooperative and helpful but friendship is not necessary especially if he has nothing in common with his co-workers. I wonder if Sally would push this if Ted worked in an office mostly populated by women?

I like my co-workers but I would not spend my own time with them. Forced socialization would make a bad work environment for me.

Says and goes are not synonyms. Lately, that mistake has really bothered me. I try to ignore it and I do not say anything to those who make it. In the larger scheme of things this should hardly rate a flicker of a thought. I considerate it an indication of current state of my life. I have time for this kind of thing to bother me therefore life is good.

40 effing days!

I like support under my chairs and tables but that's just me.

40 days without a Mary Worth appearance. Will Mary reappear before the end of Ramadan (September 30 - October 1 in North America)?* That's one pious biddy - Lent and Ramadan.

*Source: http://www.when-is.com/ramadan-2008.asp

Feel free to participate in the newest poll - Mary Worth will reappear for which holiday?

September 30: Eid ul-Fitr (last day of Ramadan) - Muslim holiday
October 9: Yom Kippur - Jewish holiday
October 28: Diwali - Hindu holiday
December 9: Bodhi Day - Buddhist holiday

Pronounced Hay - Soos

Jesus not only fixed Wally's vision and regrew his hair but caused that hair to move with a life of its own. I need to check out my Dilbert Widget and see what color was chosen for Wally's hair. I hope it's red.

So we won't get an actual flashback just Mary talking about her past. Giella and Moy, feel free to exploit the graphic capabilities of the comic strip medium. The comic strip not only allows you to tell but to show. This gives it the distinct advantage over the written word alone and conversations at church coffee hour.

If the visuals won't be interesting I hope the words continue to keep my interest.

This perceived marketing failure can be salvaged. Market it to migraine sufferers as an empathy tool for the non-migraine sufferers in their life.

Living the dream

Wally and I have the same dream.

My job title is changing to better reflect what I do and will do. The HR people in my office will offer suggestions to the agency HR office. A lot of the candidates have "communications" in it. The agency HR will do whatever they want with those suggestions. I don't have the programming skills to qualify for "Software Simian" but I could squeak by with "Code Monkey". The agency has a career ladder for its people to climb. A prehensile tail would facilitate the climb. I will probably end up with Senior Office Associate (because we don't want you to start climbing a new ladder that more accurately reflects your skills and duties). I have no reason to be so pessimistic. The actions and suggestions taken so far lead me to believe that I will have the opportunity to climb a different ladder. Regardless of the title, I'm excited about the new duties and responsibilities. Unlike Wally, I will have to do more work and show real value.

Mary is also proud of taking part in the washing of Pilate's hands, standing around St. Petersburg when it was time for a change, and riding a tank while holding a general's rank. Have some sympathy, courtesy and taste.

Suit Slapping: Guest starring William Windom

I love gags that play with homonyms. They seem so obvious when someone does draw it but yet no one else thought of it. Making the PHB take off his suit so that Bob the Dinosaur can slap him with it is a bit funnier than Bob bringing a different suit to slap. It would have worked a bit better visually if the suit was on a hanger. Maybe Bob could have held up a hanger in the second panel. The PHB is really being slapped with pants and a tie in the third panel. Everyone has their artistic limits.

Playing the role of Dr. Jeff Cory: William Windom Most well known to Trek fans as Commodore Matthew Decker from Doomsday Machine. I was able to recall the name of the actor but I still checked imdb.com. My confidence in my Trek trivia abilities is slipping.

Mary, you have no business talking about Drew's self absorption (I'm not quite sure if I have the right word - Drew Cory, the quicker picker upper). Something about removing a plank from your own eye before removing a speck from someone else's eye. Not that you actually read the Bible. The only way you hear of any sort of philosophy or moral teaching is third hand and manage to mangle it into some sickening platitude.

In A Perfect World...

For some reason, I found the middle panel especially funny and relevant to my web host problems.

My log in problem has been sent to the next level technician.

Today is Walter's birthday. I did not forget.

I am invigorated by busywork

The job is not so bad right now. I'm working on an interesting project but since it is registration time my train of thought is often interrupted by phone calls. I feel like a character in Harrison Bergeron by Kurt Vonnegut. (I made a reference to Kurt Vonnegut - I'm such an intellectual!) Just when a germ of an idea develops the phone rings.

Some helpful hints in calling for an appointment and thoughts that go through my head while talking to you:

• Have your schedule in front of you before calling
• Your mom sounds like a very lovely person but she is not doing you any favors by calling me to make your appointments. Your sister or girlfriend aren't either. How come I never talk to fathers, brothers or boyfriends?
• How can you not know your current class schedule by now?
• Talking on the phone is nerve wracking - I hate doing it myself - but I can recall my own name rather quickly despite the circumstances
• Leave some identifying information in your e-mail - a real name preferably. I feel kind of silly addressing a response to Mr. rockthegoodag11 (not a real handle that I know of)
• Our department has over 400 undergraduates, so no, I cannot guarantee a quick response from the advisor

About the account suspension and taking time off from exercise: I did not realize the amount of time in the evenings that I devoted to updating my website and exercise. I've been going to sleep earlier than usual. Maybe this account suspension was the break I needed but refused to take. I'm still quite interested in what caused the suspension and would like to get things back up. Someone actually expressed concern.

Variations on a Gag

Bonus avatar courtesy of Rex Morgan MD:

Variations on a gag:

Sometimes, I feel like Dilbert in the last panel after going through yet another anti-racism/ anti-oppression/ embrace diversity workshop or presentation.

In the United States, the dentists wear masks to protect the patient. I would think that the set up in the last panel would make access to the teeth more difficult.

Who hasn't dreamt of this happening?

You might be a tad obsessed with Mary Worth if you find yourself attempting to imitate the poses as drawn. The hand pose in the second panel is doable but a tad painful. No, I can't draw hands any better. I know alumni from the University of Texas (t.u. for us Aggies) and other schools with that shade of orange as a school color would love to know where Dr. Drew purchases his lab coats. The matching pants can be found easily.

Comics, comics, comics

Letters have appeared in the local paper complaining about large dogs on the loose. The letters tend to be hysterical in tone and call for a breed ban (Rottweiler, Pit Bull). The large dogs do not bother me. Most owners of large dogs in my neighborhood demonstrate responsibility by keeping their dogs in the backyard or restrained in some way. They follow the leash laws. The people who need reminding of leash laws are the owners of toy breeds. Having a little dog nipping at your ankles while running is quite annoying. I need to write a letter to the editor about that.

Poor Spot. I wish I lived on Ballard Street. A people who have a facade of normality but yet unafraid to display their goofiness.

I thought of Ms. Theologian when I saw this cartoon. I'm living my dream - sitting in a cold office and recording a video about elk calls. I get the edit the video into smaller chunks once I have captured the whole thing. Elk calls are annoying. Trust me on this.

A cool part of this job is my computer is powerful enough to allow me to capture a video and do other things. I do have my own office with full walls and a window. If I had to do aspects of this job in a cube farm my co-workers would have legitimate grounds to beat me. Seriously, elk calls are fucking annoying. Yes, I have the volume turned down low. I don't have it completely off so that I can hear when the video ends.

F Minus illustrates the future. Eventually, all bar stool will be shaped that way.

TJ has other facial expressions!

Call an ambulance! We have a suicidal person on the premises!

Buddha had it way too easy

I've looked at this strip several times and in different venues. For some reason, I see the wall in the middle panel as hanging and not quite touching the floor rather than an intersection of the floor and wall. I found it distracting but at least Scott Adams is trying new perspectives. I found the phrase, "I curse your dinner!" very funny.

Brilliant!

Try meditating with a lightning alarm going off on a sunny day or a group of Junior ROTC students marching and chanting very disturbing things. At least no one has touched me or tried to witness while I meditated. I don't make noises and I don't do the finger to thumb thing.

Dr. Drew Cory - Mr. Smooth. I love a man whose hair highlights matches his wardrobe.

Pleasure to meet you, now die

It would not surprise to find such an option in Windows.

What species is that? A bear or a Sasquatch?

I love not working but I don't watch bowling. If I put an honest objective statement on my resume it would read: To get as much money as possible in exchange for as little work as possible.

Vera looks awful in the second panel. I like how she is prepared to leave this party at any moment. I understand why Vera's father gave all the money to Von and orders to take care of his sister. She seems to have some kind of social handicap. Pleasure to meet you, now DIE!

The first day of Spring, hooray!

Bonus icon:
The indifference of Mary Worth

Asking the right questions can also make most religions seem ridiculous. Fortunately, in the United States a boycott or a loud protest is the worst thing that can happen. Other places and times, death.

Yeah, yeah, blah blah, blahdeblah blah blah. Vera really starts at the bottom by taking a job that no longer exists. Mary Worth does not care she just wants your soul. Mary plucks the world's tiniest violin.

The first day of spring and I see this. Tom Wilson owes me something for disturbing me on the first day of spring. Ziggy does not wear pants and now he's modest? I wonder if this is before or after Ziggy has taken of business? The more I think about this comic the more disturbed I become.

I spend a great of time going over these entries to eliminate instances of passive voice. I do it for most of my writing. I do this to avoid the disapproval of an English teacher I had not seen in nearly 20 years. I doubt she reads this. I wonder if any of Ms. Kessler's other former students do this or am I just nuts?

Ms. Kessler taught junior and senior English at Spring High School in Spring, Texas.

First an icon:
Sartre said it better but he was French, not as funny and did not draw cartoons.

The sign in the lower right corner is a great touch. (Please inform the clerk if you are a nitwit. Thank You) My husband's employer should consider posting a sign like that. It would have to be bilingual.

The stories of stupidity does provide my husband with some entertainment and me with cartoon material. It is only funny after the nitwit has left. Dealing with the nitwit can be quite stressful during the encounter.

The second funniest thing behind fart jokes - violent accidental almost killing. My husband can tell which shotgun can cause that much damage to an easy chair.

The Flintstones in modern times.

I've often wondered how one becomes a motivational speaker. I'm not talking about people that have accomplished something in another field then asked to become speakers. I'm talking about people like Anthony Robbins and Brian Tracy. As far as my research has shown neither of these men have achieved success in other fields. They are famous only as motivational speakers/ success gurus. They have achieved success by convincing others that they understand the keys to success and for a price will share the secrets to success. The hard part would be convincing the first person to purchase your material.

Prospect: So you know the keys to success?
Guru: Yes, yes I do!
Prospect: Give me some examples of success that you have achieved using these keys.
Guru: Well, uh, this is my first business and you are my first student but it is all right here in my book, DVDs and Cd's. Everything you need to know in order to succeed.
Prospect: Call me after you have achieved success.

A vulture has to do what a vulture has to do in order to survive.

Clever gag. I wish I thought of it.

I have a damn cold. Mostly sinus congestion. It shouldn't affect my affect my race performance too much this Sunday. I hope to feel much better by then. I'm not using all 8 cylinders right now.

Alice is my role model. I would prefer to use a blunt object rather than hurting my hands because my hands create such wondrous objects of beauty that - hey, the cold medicine kicked in. I wonder if beating an idiot's head would cause their underused neurons to fire? My higher truth knows that beating the willfully ignorant is best for me.

Dick joke! Dick joke on the comics page!

I find drawing hands challenging but I do work it out by using my own hands, visualization or asking someone for help. I can understand how the artist for Flight Deck can screw up the handshake. I do it quite a bit but I correct it when I figure it out or do something different if I can't get something quite right.

Enough with the exclamation points! This conversation is not that exciting! Stop shouting at each other! No, there's no irony! Just a dumb observation!

The irony is that Mary's higher truth is in direct conflict with every sane person's higher truth!

People come to Ella for advice, period! Mary, if you believe that what Ella dispenses is higher truth, then you have a damn shallow, meaningless existence! Go to a church, temple, synagogue, mosque, the woods or someplace far away from Charterstone and Santa Royale to gain some higher truth! Shit, yeah, I'm overusing exclamation points!

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