Pool Party!

Drew's thought balloon in the second panel makes all the suffering reading this comic worthwhile. Drew, now you know why ol' Dad used the old "want to do something fun?" question.

I work at an University. I work with lots of people with the title, Professor. None of them would want to be addressed as 'Professor' on or off campus. Only a grade A tool or Sherwood Schwartz sitcom character would allow it.

Mary Worth time: 24 hours of Mary Worth time = 84 hours of non-comic strip time. Which means this pool party will last at least a week.

GET ON WITH IT!!!!!!!

I hate Mary Worth! I hate Mary Worth! I hate Mary Worth! I hate Mary Worth! I hate Mary Worth! I hate Mary Worth!

So why can't I stop reading it?

So Mary Worth time moves a lot more slowly than I thought. For those not keeping up - the pool party is tomorrow in Mary Worth time. At this rate the party won't actually happen until July - 2008.

There is a bit of dharma here. I became so attached to the expectation of a pool party that I ended up suffering when the plot did not move to my expectations.

I made this assumption about the pool party because in the past Moy and Giella took advantage of the extra Sunday panels with previous pool parties.

I love Mary's goofy expression in the second panel.

Blog Rating

Mingle² - Online Dating

This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:

• crappy (2x)
• drugs (1x)

Running Log

This week I ran 8.95 miles, burned 1137.3 calories and weigh 176.8 pounds.

Monday: 2 miles in 20:48
Wednesday: 3 miles in 32:31
Saturday: 3 miles in 31:57

Slimy, absolutely slimy

I subscribe to an e-newsletter called Early to Rise. Usually contains interesting information and I can ignore the sales pitches, mostly material on how to get rich by investing in real estate or as a direct marketing copywriter (junk mail writer). I found the following article very useful but probably not in the way that the author intended. Further comments following the article.
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How the Difference Between Liverwurst and Pate Can Help You Make More Sales
By Michael Masterson

Nothing sells better than price. No matter how valuable your product is... or how clever your marketing is... nothing will increase your customer base faster than underpricing your competition.

This secret is often overlooked, but it's the most reliable way to grow a brand-new small business or revive a business that's on the verge of failing.

Once you've established a substantial customer base by using this tactic, you will want to gradually increase the quality of your product/service and gradually raise your prices. And while you're doing that, you may reach a point where you can no longer compete on price... but the quality of your product isn't yet good enough to attract luxury buyers.

What do you do then? You make your price seem cheap - even if it's not.

Back in the late 1960s, I worked at a company that sold aluminum siding. The typical "package" we sold retailed at $2,800. That was a lot of money back in 1967, especially in the working-class neighborhoods we sold in. Like all good selling pitches, ours focused on the benefits first. We did a very good job of helping our prospects imagine how much better, easier, and fuller their lives would be once the asbestos shingles that covered their homes were hidden beneath a fine, shiny facade of bright, white aluminum.

It's what happened after we made those big promises that I want to talk about today - what my boss, Harvey Fisher, used to do after the sale was made. By "after the sale was made," I mean after the prospect had emotionally committed to owning the aluminum siding but before he found out how expensive it was.

This is a critical part of any sales presentation, but it's especially sensitive when the potential
customer has little or no idea of the product's price. The challenge: Now that you've lodged a hook deep into his heart, how do you get his brain to interpret your price as a good deal?

An inexperienced salesperson might want to break the price to the prospect slowly - by, for example, first quoting the cost of the gutters and leaders (say, $400), then the cost of the underhangs and fascia (another $400), then the windows and doors ($800), and, finally, the siding itself ($1,000). But, though logical, I learned from Harvey that this method doesn't work very well. "If you want to make the price of a liverwurst look cheap," he used to tell me, "say it's pate."

If I didn't understand what he meant the first time I heard him say that, the principle became clear when I saw Harvey in action. After getting some young couple to "imagine" how much nicer their house would look clad in aluminum, how much the neighbors would admire them, and how generally happy they'd be, he'd ask them, "Now, Mr. and Mrs. Smith, tell me this... how much would you guess it would cost you to cover your house in solid oak?"

"Oak?" they would ask. "But we thought..."

"I'm serious," Harvey would insist. "How much would it cost?"

It was the husbands who always ventured the first guess. "I don't know. Maybe $5,000?"

"$5,000?" Harvey would look at the wife. "Do you think you could do it for $5,000?"

"Gee, I don't know. Probably not."

The number would go up. $6,000. $7,000. $8,000. At each new estimate, Harvey would shake his head sadly and say, "You should be so lucky."

Harvey would pause for a good while, giving the frazzled couple a chance to imagine how they were going to come up with the $10,000 this was bound to cost, and then "hit them with the zinger" (as he liked to call it): "Let me give you 10 good reasons why aluminum siding is better than solid oak!"

It wasn't logical, but it was effective. By the time Harvey finished enumerating the 10 reasons aluminum was better than oak, they were mentally prepared to spend $10,000. When Harvey told them they'd have to fork out only $2,800, they practically jumped with joy.

Harvey's trick has a long history in the business of selling. It's been a mainstay of many of the best salespeople I know. I've used it myself to make tens of millions of dollars worth of sales.

Yes, it's very powerful. It's also very effective and surprisingly adaptable. In fact, it should
probably be a key part of every sales presentation that is made by you or your business.

In his book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion, Robert Cialdini puts a label to this technique. He calls it "the principle of contrast" and illustrates it with a story from Leo Rosten about the Drubeck brothers, Sid and Harry, who owned a menswear shop in Rosten's neighborhood while he was growing up in the 1930s:

"Whenever the salesman, Sid, had a new customer trying on suits in front of the shop's three-sided mirror, he would admit to a hearing problem, and, as they talked, he would repeatedly request that the man speak more loudly to him. Once the customer had found a suit he liked and asked for the price, Sid would call to his brother, the head tailor, at the back of the room: 'Harry, how much for this suit?' Looking up from his work - and greatly exaggerating the suit's true price - Harry would call back: 'For that beautiful all-wool suit, $42.' Pretending not to have heard and cupping his hand to his ear, Sid would ask again. Once more, Harry would reply '$42.' At this point, Sid would turn to the customer and report: 'He says $22.' Many a man would hurry to buy the suit and scramble out of the shop with his 'bargain' before poor Sid discovered the 'mistake.'"

It's not always true, but most people... most of the time... like a bargain. We not only want what we want and what we hope it will give us, we also want to pay the "right" price for it. The best way to make the price of your product or service seem "right" is to compare it to something similar that costs more. If you happen to sell inexpensive CZ diamonds, this isn't difficult. The stones you can sell for $5 or $10 apiece look every bit as good as the authentic ones going for 1,000 times that price.

But if the price you are asking isn't such an obvious bargain, you need to be more creative. Instead of comparing your product to a similar one that costs the same, find (or create) something special about your product that makes it unique. I did that early in my career when I compared subscribing to the $100 newsletter I was selling to joining an expensive investment club (which sounded as if it should cost $1,000). I've done it hundreds of times since in all sorts of ways. You can too.

Cialdini's principle of contrast is also used to create additional sales. It's done in direct marketing all the time by selling the main item at one price, and then additional similar items at a discount.

When I shop at Saks, Al, my regular salesman, uses the principle of contrast to get me to spend a ton of money on "accessories." Here's how he does it:

First, he sells me on the suit - for $1,000 or more. I'm ready to pull out my wallet, but Al's not
finished with me. He takes me over to the shirt counter to show me some shirts that "will go
sensationally" with the suit I just bought. These shirts are expensive... usually more than $100 each. I don't normally pay that much for a shirt, but after laying out so much on the suit, they seem cheap. When Al is done selling me two or three overpriced (but, by contrast, seemingly cheap) shirts, he hits me with the $70 ties. I'm lucky to get out of Al's grasp at twice the price of the suit.

CP, a real-estate broker I deal with, uses the principle of contrast to get his clients to buy more real estate. If I tell him I'm in the market for a two-bedroom house off Atlantic Avenue for about $350,000, he'll be sure to first show me at least one or two so-so two-bedroom houses that are overpriced at $400,000 and $425,000. After those disappointments, I'll be thrilled when he shows me one for a mere $375,000 - $25,000 more than I was prepared to pay, but a bargain in contrast to what I had just seen.

This technique works. Are you using it effectively in your business?

This article appears courtesy of Early To Rise, the Internet’s most popular health, wealth, and success e-zine. For a complimentary subscription, visit http://www.earlytorise.com
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In order to republish this article I must include the above paragraph.

After reading this article I thought, "Salespeople wonder why they are considered slimy by non-salespeople?" I felt a bit slimy after reading this and I don't work in sales. What I found even more bizarre is that the author recognizes and falls for the technique himself.

I wonder what it really cost to cover a house with solid oak?

I found the article useful in helping me recognize a somewhat slimy sales technique and I hope I can keep my wits about me enough not to fall for it next time I want to buy something.

My emotional reaction to this article has brought free advertising for the newsletter, so I guess it would count as a success.

Find the gag

Jeez, Dr. Jeff! Why are you still speaking to your adult son like that? Every child knows that the speech in panel one translates as, "I'm going to tell you to do something totally unpleasant." Mary curtails the sense of dread by revealing that the task is attending a pool party. Drew is visibly relieved that he is not being asked to clean the gutters or something. Drew has never attended a Charterstone pool party, he might prefer cleaning the gutters after attending this party.

Somebody find the gag for me. Looks like the Dallas skyline in the background.

Last night, I used my PDA (a Palm Zire m150, in case anyone cares) to waste about 2 hours.

Jesus sings

I laughed at this. Jesus, forgive me.

Pool Party and other things

The appearance of this comic has helped answer the real time vs. comic time question. Mary will attempt to set up Drew with Vera at the Charterstone pool party (whenever that happens). I will actually read Mary Worth this weekend. I normally confine my Mary Worth habit to 5 days a week but I will make an exception in anticipation of the big pool party. I run the risk of finding Mary Worth time much slower than I previously thought. I've have some deep breathing exercises and a punching bag ready in case the pool party does not happen this weekend.

I do have a real life. I will attend a real party in appreciation of the church's ministerial search committee this Sunday.

Also on the church front, we have neighbors that like to use the alley and our grounds to run their dune buggy. Three members and two police officers have spoken to them and they have not modified their behavior. I missed the service but I read that they ran their dune buggy up and down the alley during service. What happened to respecting other people's property and obeying the police?

Edgar has become more comfortable with his surroundings. He has joined Salvador in the morning chirp, shriek and whistle fest and he climbs in and out of the cage. He does not bite as hard. He perched on my thumb after I guided him from the floor back to the cage. His wing feathers have not grown out long enough for him to fly properly. Edgar has even intimidated Salvador enough to make him move from a perch. Funny that Sal lets a bird half his size intimidate him.

Hooray for YouTube!

YouTube comes to the rescue in getting rid of ear worms (scroll down to find the song I'm referring to).

Time for a career reevaluation

Sign that I need to reevaluate my career - participation in this project intrigues me.

ESA looks 'Mars mission' volunteers
The European Space Agency has announced a search for volunteers to participate in a 520-day simulated Mars mission. The experiment is part of the preparation for future space exploration in which astronauts will have to take care of themselves for nearly two years, experiencing extreme isolation and confinement. The experiment, in cooperation with the Russian Institute of Biomedical Problems, will send a crew of six on a 520-day simulated mission to Mars. The simulation will follow the profile of a real Mars mission, with nutrition identical to that provided on the International Space Station. The simulations will take place inside a special facility in Moscow. A precursor 105-day study is to start by mid-2008, possibly followed by another 105-day study, before the full 520-day study begins in late 2008 or early 2009. The ESA is looking for 12 volunteers -- four for each of the three simulations. The selection procedure is similar to that used for ESA astronauts, although there will be more emphasis on psychological factors and stress resistance than on physical fitness. Details concerning the experiment are available at
http://www.spaceflight.esa.int/callforcandidates.

Comic time

Things at work have slowed down a bit. I've been filming and editing candidate videos. I will do more of that in the beginning of next week. I've enjoyed doing this over the infinite project. I did receive some helpful suggestions for the project, for example "need photo" in a space holder that I placed on the poster for the photos that I'm trying to get. I wonder if one of the wildlife researchers will let me use the tranquilizer dart gun? That will make some of these people stop so I can get a photo. I did receive some actual helpful suggestions on this project, very few of them providing the information I need but I'll take what I can get.
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Themes for today's comics: other characters appearing in single panel comics and dog drinking out of the toilet bowl gags (Buckles and Mother Goose and Grimm, which I did not post here).

B.C. explores the hilarity of domestic violence.

Sometimes, I suspend a bit of scientific knowledge for the sake of a gag. It looks like Glasbergen does the same thing. But I felt this panel pushed the suspension a bit far. I immediately thought of the baleen whales rather than the toothed whales when reading this gag. A panel caption does not provide enough space to make distinctions. I suppose "..why do sperm whales (or killer whales) weigh two tons?" could have worked. Maintain the integrity of the gag with some scientific accuracy.

More information about whale diets and weights can be found here and here.

Now, I have that song stuck in my head. Shining star for you to see... What your life can truly be... Damn it, now I have to go find that song so that I can hear the whole thing so I can make the parts that I know stop playing in a loop in my head.
Idea for a game show for cartoonists: Set up that bad punchline. Contestants receive a bad punchline and then proclaim how many panels it would take them to set it up. Then they would have to draw the comic. I can set up that crappy punchline in two panels. Ha, I can set it up in a single panel.
Face it Mary, no one wants to attend the Charterstone pool party. Sadly, I'm kind of looking forward to it. This could answer questions about Mary Worth time. Will the pool party strip appear tomorrow or will it wait until Sunday? If it appears tomorrow then Mary Worth time corresponds to our 24 hour day but if it does not appear until Sunday then 60 hours of our time equals 24 hours of Mary Worth time. We have the potential for a breakthrough in comic strip physics research.

Giella can still draw the withering stare of Mary Worth.

Collaboration

Walter and I are collaborating on a graphic novel. He's writing and doing layouts and I'm drawing, scanning and lettering. This is my first project with serious content. We collaborated on some funny projects during the first years of our marriage. This will be a challenge for me because the story requires a drawing style that I don't use very often. I have to sharpen some very rusty skills. I'm a bit worried about my ability to bring Walter's vision to life.

I need to draw some model sheets; something I haven't done in years.

We've decided on Edgar as the name for our new parakeet. He chirps and makes his own set of noises now. I think he has become comfortable with Salvador. Still trying to teach him to perch on one of our fingers.
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Royboy didn't look at his neighbor's paper, he stole in between panel 2 and 3. It's little mistakes like that, in which I don't want to make on this graphic novel. The advantage of drawing single panel comics is that one does not have to worry about continuity errors.

Leroy, never mock a woman carrying a crowbar.

Ah, poor Mary, she didn't really expect Dr. Jeff to actually fund raise. The fundraising bit was to ease Dr. Jeff's guilt about leaving those sick children without a doctor. Mary does not care about children, she just wants Dr. Jeff. But he's raising the funds and not paying attention to Mary. How will Mary put a stop to this?

Wow, Dr. Jeff has recovered nicely, even looks several years younger.

Lots of comics

I want the flotation device in the third panel.

I wish they did make flags with whoopie cushions on them. I would buy one.

Family Circus parody day this past Sunday

Two comics that demonstrate how my mind works:
I wouldn't write a dissertation but I've had existential questions about fictional characters. Often, I find the fictional more interesting than the real.

Running Log

This week I ran 7.14 miles, burned 914.4 calories and weigh 176.2 calories.

Monday: 2 miles in 22:32
Wednesday: 2 miles in 21:01
Saturday: 2 miles in 26:31

Saturday, I stepped on the back roller of the treadmill and injured my knee. I ended up walking most of the final .60 miles.

I'm doing the rest, ice, compression, elevation thing. Ibuprofen helps too.

The garage sales pretty much sucked. Clothes, clothes and more clothes. Just take it to the Salvation Army. One sale was good but the rest were a waste of time.

James Joyce/ Mary Worth Mash-up

In celebration of James Joyce and his novel Ulysses, a James Joyce/ Mary Worth mash-up by Comics Curmudgeon reader, Nate. Magnification required.

Train up a child

Biblical Action figures from Train Up a Child, Inc.

Field Goal!
Dark skinned Moses.

Tablets and Red Sea not included.

Three comics that I would hang on my fridge

Three comics that I would hang on my fridge if I read them in a newspaper. The first two I understand the sentiments expressed in the last panel and the third one I just found sick, twisted and very funny.





Looks like readers of Mary Worth will suffer through weeks of Mary's attempt to get a man for Vera. Mary did not pay attention to Vera when she stated that she did not want to depend on a man. Oops, my heterosexism is showing. Karen Moy could take Mary Worth into controversial territory and set up Vera with a woman. Or even have Mary explore her - oh god, I just made myself ill. Yeah, right. That would be too interesting. Stick with the pedestrian so that I have something to write about.

I don't observe the movement of long hair in real life but, in the second panel, the position of Vera's ponytail versus the position of her head does not look right.

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This cartoon was inspired by my 6th grade band director at Memorial Middle School in Garland, Texas. The school is now some special type of school instead of a regular middle school. The band director whose name I've forgotten was a grade-A asshole to me and incompetent. One advantage to changing schools a lot is that I had a large sample for comparison.

I played the clarinet and I'm slightly tone deaf. Maybe band is not the best place for a slightly tone deaf person. But I stayed all the way through my senior year in high school. All this despite the best efforts of Mr. Asshole. I only suffered through Mr. Asshole's "teaching" for 5 months. Mr. Asshole's technique for helping me tune my instrument involved screaming at me - "YOU'RE FLAT!!!" Adjust your embouchure! YOU'RE STILL FLAT!!! Adjust your EMBOUCHURE! CAN'T YOU HEAR THAT!! YOU'RE STILL FLAT!!! WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!!!! ADJUST YOUR EMBOUCHURE!

Not a nice thing to do in front of a whole class of 6th graders, who did not like me very much anyway. Luckily for him I did not have access to a firearm or a particularly aggressive personality. The most that I ever did to him was give him a dirty look and point out that I am adjusting the best that I can.


Later, from a different band director at a different school, I learned about adjusting the barrel on the clarinet and purchasing better reeds.

The cartoon is about incompetent people simply screaming useless advice hoping that repeated screaming will improve things.

An evil part of me hopes that Mr. Asshole died a very painful death while an incompetent doctor screamed at him, YOU'RE SICK - STOP BEING SICK!! BE HEALTHY! WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU!!! WHY CAN'T YOU SEE THAT YOU ARE SICK!!!!

I would find that very funny and laugh out loud despite the disapproval of polite society. I settle for drawing a cartoon about it 23 years later.

Bugs

I spent the afternoon tracking down a nice little PowerPoint 2007 problem.

A presentation was created in PowerPoint 2003. This presentation included embedded Flash and Shockwave files. The files play fine in 2003 and 2007 (as long as they are not saved in 2007). Changes were made to the presentation using 2007, now the Shockwave and Flash files do not work. Upon opening the presentation (saved in 2007) receive this message:

Some controls on this presentation can't be activated. They might no be registered on this computer.

This message appears whether opening in 2007 or 2003.

I spent several hours at the Microsoft site and other sites. A more qualified IT person spent several hours at the Microsoft site and other sites. Installing SwiffPlayer did not help. Anyway, all I can figure out is that 2007 causes some screw up with Active-X controls. From reading the forums on Microsoft's site, others are having the same problem. No solutions so far.

The person who made the presentation just informed me that the message does not appear if saved in the default 2007 format. Now the question is if it will play on a machine with 2003. According to Microsoft, it should.

Saving as a 2003 in 2007 causes a hiccup with the ActiveX controls. One would do that if trying to remain compatible with older versions.

The 2007 version is coming my way and I'm about to try it with my 2003.

Damn, received this message:

This file was created in a newer version of Microsoft Office PowerPoint. The file has been converted to a format you can work with, but ActiveX controls have been converted to static objects.

I'm downloading a file format compatibility converter from Microsoft to see if that solves the problem. Nope, the converter does not extend to ActiveX controls. Crap.

Mary Worth, Jedi Knight

So, Karen Moy goes for the least interesting objection to attending the pool party.

In the first panel Mary is using the Jedi Mind Trick. You will go to the Charterstone party next week! I will go to the Charterstone party next week. These are not the droids you're looking for. These are not the droids I'm looking for. Move along. Move along.

Next, the readers suffer through weeks of Mary trying to convince Vera to lead a more balanced life. All work and no play.

Because radio sucks, Pixel.

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Tonight, I attend my first board meeting as Past-President.

More on the new addition

Little bird has survived more than 48 hours, so he deserves a name. So far, Walter and I have come up with Edgar and Ficus. Edgar, after Edgar Allen Poe to stick with the arty theme for naming birds and Ficus because of his personality, so far.

One has to interact a lot with a parakeet to get them to display some personality. I'm trying to get Edgar/ Ficus used to my hand in the cage. Hopefully, he will associate my hand with food and realize that it is a good thing. Maybe he will also see how much fun Salvador has outside of the cage interacting with people and he will join in the fun. I will try not to rush things, let Edgar/ Ficus do things at his pace.

I need to take some pictures.

Party? Are You Serious?

A little Mary Worth avatar fun featuring Vera Shields:

Bob Thaves has died but his son can write a good gag. Maybe Frank and Ernest will not become a zombie strip, a mere shell of a once good comic strip haunting newspapers around the world.

So many ways to add to Vera's line in the second panel.

Party? Are you serious? I can't rest on my laurels, I have to get that next promotion!

Party? Are you serious? You expect me to stoop to attending a party with you Santa Royale hoi polloi?! I may not live in Pacific Hills any longer but that does not mean I have to socialize with the likes of you!

Party? Are you serious? Geriatrics in bathing suits, ewwww!

Party? Are you serious? Is that creepy Professor Cameron going to be there?

Party? Are you serious? Look, Mary I'm grateful for your help but I really find parties quite draining. I prefer one on one or very small group socializing. Large parties make me really uncomfortable.

Party? Are you serious? A large typhoon is expected to reach landfall this weekend. Shouldn't we evacuate?

Party? Are you serious? You want me to come to the party even though I acted a bit brusque at the last pool party?

Party? Are you serious? No, Vera, I'm being silly. I'm going to kill you and make a casserole out of your still beating heart.

Now the interactive portion. Add your own line in the comments.

Party? Are you serious? _________________

1,000th post

A great article by Rev. Sean: 10 things we can learn from Mormanism

This kind of article is what I enjoy about the UU blogosphere and keeps me interested in perspectives of other UUs - minister and laity.

In regards to Rev. Sean's article - I think my church could learn some of the same things from Evangelicals and Baptists. Yes, Baptists and Evangelicals are looked upon as separate entities in this region. Everyone makes fun of the Baptists, even other Evangelical faiths. I know this as a former Evangelical Christian. We made fun of them because they did not dance. The services I used to attend included dancing. Sometimes, I miss that element of worship. I've been clapping during appropriate hymns hoping others would follow suit. I need to clap louder. Sometimes, I feel awkward being the only set of hands clapping. Others do eventually start clapping but by the time everyone finds the beat the hymn is over. At Evangelical churches I've attended, the words to the songs are projected on to a screen or wall, thus freeing the hands for clapping and the body for moving.

Rev. Sean's article has spurred me to think about the gifts that my religious past has given me. There could be a sermon or service there or maybe just a blog entry.

The Tao of Mary Worth

...what you've done some people take a lifetime to do! I'm expending too much energy trying to fathom the meaning of a poorly written platitude uttered in a poorly written comic strip. That is the definition of a platitude - words that sound nice but really have very little meaning.

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Yesterday, I played technology maven. A video conference went smoothly until the remote site timed out the last hour. I suspect time zone differences. After a system reboot, my site connected but the other site could not get through the TAMU firewall. Tech support asked if I could go to the other site to work through the firewall issues. I had to answer no, since the remote site is in Georgia and I am in Texas. Apparently, tech support only saw site codes and not locations. The rest of the conference was conducted by speaker phone.

For some reason, I'm the second contact for this site in Georgia. I hope that I don't end up receiving requests about the Georgia site. With a large entity, like Texas A&M, once something gets into a database, list or whatever, it can take a long time for that information to get corrected.

Photo Essay

Interesting photo essay: http://www.time.com/time/photogallery/0,29307,1626519,00.html
What the world eats: What's on family dinner tables in fifteen different homes around the world.

I was struck by the ubiquitousness of Coca-Cola products.

Directed to the essay by bytes of grass.

Heron of hope

A symptom of a bad comic strip - the background is more interesting than the foreground. Is that a painting or a window in the second panel? Contrasts nicely with the inky black void surrounding it.

Something better explode because I cannot live with the thought that I wasted over 6 weeks of my life interested in this plot line. Remember, a professional wrote this story.

Running Log and New Addition

This week I ran 10.76 miles, burned 1332.5 calories and weigh 177.3 pounds.

Monday: 3.06 miles in 35:00
Wednesday: 3.10 miles in 35:00
Friday: 4.60 miles in 65:00

Next week I start my marathon training. I downloaded a training plan from Runnersworld.com. It is based upon my half-marathon time, current weekly mileage and how intense I want to train. I chose the hard option (mileage increases of 15% with a gradual pace increase). Only three runs a week (sometimes only 2) - it should be interesting.

We have added a parakeet to the family. Right now, he has been dubbed "little bird". He and Salvador are working things out and we are waiting for a bit more personality to emerge before he is formally named. Pictures will be posted soon. The little guy looks so tiny next to Salvador.

Quiz Results

45% Mingle² - Free Online Dating

I'm sort of screwed

I Scored a 100%!

Mingle² - Free Online Dating

But at least I can spell

76% Geek Mingle² - Free Online Dating

Now you know why my chances of surviving a Zombie Apocolypse are 45%

Free Online Dating

I did better when I was in 8th grade.

They are all around..

I can't avoid them!

An icon/ avatar from Mark Trail for your enjoyment:

From the second panel of this comic...For those who do not read Mark Trail, a synopsis of the story line that led to today's strip:

Some corrupt county officials want the county to buy their land to build a new airport on it. Problem: the county already has a perfectly good airport. So the county officials hire a shady hunting guide to put a bunch of birds around the airport thus creating a danger to aircraft. The airport becomes unusable thus the county has to build a new airport and a couple of officials have some land that they can sell. Mark Trail will uncover the plot and foil our villains.

Bad guys executing a ridiculously elaborate scheme in order to make a profit should be a familiar plot to anyone who grew up watching Scooby-Doo. Instead of ghosts, we have birds. Instead of meddling kids, we have a meddling wildlife biologist. In both, somebody is wearing a kerchief.

AWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Charging at windmills

I got a crazy notion in my head. I thought about the candidates for U.S. President. I thought about what I would ask them if given the opportunity.

I compiled 6 questions. Wrote 16 letters (they will go in the mail tomorrow). Sent 16 e-mails. Made a blog: http://sixquestions-toonhead.blogspot.com/ Await answers.

There are 18 candidates so far but two did not have a mailing address (Brownback and Kucinich) and two did not have an appropriate e-mail address (Tancredo and Romney).

I thought the worst thing that could happen is being ignored. Walter thought the worst is getting questioned by the authorities for sending letters to all the candidates.

Yes, it will look weird to the Post Office, a pile of letters going to the campaign headquarters of every declared candidate. I'll simply explain to the clerk what I'm doing.

Google Analytics

I've installed Google Analytics on to my site. I'm looking at the keywords list. Most of the words are clip art related which makes sense since I offer a collection of clip art, free and not free, in addition to the cartoons which I draw for mostly therapeutic purposes.

A list of the more confusing/ interesting keywords used to come to my site:

• sears catalogue - this ranks higher than the U.S. spelling that I use on the site
• zoofever
• ziggy underwear
• tripple anal - I don't want to know
• linda causey
• cox internet sucks
• boarders and frames
• push ups clip art
• mary worth comic von vera story - this person or persons visited 11 time and spent an average of 00:13:43 on the site, thanks for sticking around
• running a church business meeting - this person left quickly
• introvert layouts
• looking for a bullmastiff/pit mix
• "zoofever"
• doorway cliches
• cheeseburger cheeseburger livonia
• i grunted loudly gym
• toledo bend google layers
• gym idiots
• blogspot otolaryngology
• richard miles animal nutritionist
• the world of farts
• introverted uterus how to get pregnant
• ugly food
• rev. teri ballard
• calories needed by a man + "69 inches"
• how can you hate
• perfect society unitarian
• non-discreet breastfeeding pictures
• world nymphets hard
• otolaryngology fetish picture
• zen joke dog fart
• alva ho

Can anyone top "zen joke dog fart" as a keyword?

Republican Debate

A much better analysis of the Republican Debate.

The one thing that Americans of all political and idealogical stripes can agree on: Wolf Blitzer is a douche bag.

Caddyshack

I've felt the same way myself. A nice reboot would do the trick. Better yet, a reformat with a nice clean reinstall of the important files.

Caddyshack reference! The dog is probably contemplating an unnamed phenomenon in which something pop cultural gets referenced or mentioned often for no reason. For example, Caddyshack came out in the 1980's - this comic is the first reference and then later a friend makes a reference to Caddyshack and then even later a newscaster uses something from Caddyshack as a metaphor. The Onion even did an article about this phenomenon. Can anyone think of a good term to describe it?

A drawing of a punchline of a popular joke. I wish I thought to do this. Damn, I hate it when I miss opportunities like that.

SIX WEEKS! SIX @#$%! WEEKS and THIS is where the arc ends!?! In the unseen third panel something explodes. It took SIX WEEKS to get to this point! Damn it, somebody better die! Damn, no guilt since everyone has forgiven each other and themselves. SIX WEEKS! I hate this comic but I can't stop reading it.

Mood and Basketball

Sorry about the lack of length regarding the Republican debate.

I've felt kind of ill this afternoon. Some water and shooting a few hoops helped. I parked in the street and used the basketball goal that came with the house. The net has lichen growing on it but it held together. I need to relearn how to do a lay-up. I shoot pretty well left-handed.

The kind of ill feeling is coming back (Insert joke about watching political debates) that is why I cut the previous post short. Also, I did not have my notepad with me, I just watched and relied on my memory.

I so want one of the so-called second tier candidates from either party to come out on top just to teach the mainstream media that the voters determine the outcome not them. This anointing pisses me off.

Republicans

Watched the Republicans debate. CNN's performance improved a bit but Wolf Blitzer is still a douche bag.

Tancredo and Paul are the two I found most interesting.

I'm concerned about the language in which the health care issue is being framed. Health care is being equated with insurance. It limits solutions. Most of the candidates speak of making sure that every American has insurance coverage but the problem is access to health care not insurance.

Repeats and Wikipedia

Oh lovely, a 10 year old comic not trying to disguise itself as a repeat. When running repeats, try undated material.

The first line lead me to believe that even the Lockhorns were finding For Better or For Worse, the comic strip, tiresome but was disappointed by the punchline. My marriage stinks. Ha ha.

Here's a funny but sad article about Wikipedia from Something Awful.

The Great Debates

Just some quick thoughts on the debate between the Democratic candidates for President, some relevant to the candidates, some about CNN's presentation.

Wolf Blitzer is a douche-bag. A well-groomed, articulate douche-bag but still a screaming, self-important, douche-bag. Wolf Blitzer: Douche-Bag for CNN


Set design: Looks like aesthetics trumped utility. The sound problems with the journalists would not have made a difference if they were not seated at the end of a long triangle that stretched almost across the floor section of the auditorium. What the @#$! was going on here? This was a presidential debate, a set looking like something out of Star Trek (1960's Trek) was not necessary. I bet the cameramen cursed the set designer as he had to work around that damn triangle monstrosity while filming.

Wolf Blitzer is a douche-bag.

Camera work: Distracting. All the competent directors on vacation? Couldn't borrow one from MSNBC, C-SPAN, FOX, the local public access cable station?

Wolf Blitzer is a douche-bag.

As for the candidates - my opinion who did the best, in order: Biden, Kucinich, Obama, Clinton, Gravel, Richardson, Edwards and Dodd. Biden for his willingness to speak truthfully and his passion about Darfur - he might know something of just war theory, Kucinich for questioning basic assumptions about health care reform, Obama for not only addressing questions but understanding the larger concerns behind the questions, Clinton for her willingness to not to play hypothetical question games and her good humor in dealing with the question of her husband's role, and Gravel for giving all of them hell. Richardson, Edwards and Dodd just didn't do anything for me. I'm feeling quite a bit more positive about Clinton.

I liked the format of the debate and the voter questions. I got something out of it despite CNN's best efforts. I hope CNN ditches the stupid ass set design, poor direction and Wolf Blitzer, who is a douche bag, for the Republican debate.

Church Owls and Blood Donation

Went to church today. The sermon was about a language of reverence. I mentally drifted in and out. I do that on a regular basis. Not a reflection on the person giving the sermon but a personal shortcoming. I have to make a sincere effort to pay attention if I'm not participating.

One thing that did capture my attention was something about the drifting nature of word meanings. Queer was the example used. Harmless to hurtful and then reappropriated as a symbol of pride by the group harmed by it. Queer still has all those meanings. Humor often takes advantage of these drifting and multiple meanings. This bit brought to mind some of the discussion of this past week in the UU blogosphere.

This was the first Sunday of the new fiscal year and Walter wrote a check for our new pledge amount. We increased our pledge substantially. We doubled it. During Canvass I had to restrain myself from saying, "Walter and I upped our pledge, up yours." See some of that drifting meaning stuff at work.

A family of owls has taken up residence at the UUCBV. A couple of weeks ago, the children witnessed a parent owl feeding chicks. Today, a small pair roosted in a tree. It may have been the chicks from last week or two. It caused quite a stir. All manner of cameras came out. The fun part was hearing the sounds of joy when people spotted the owls among the leaves and branches. One church member wondered what was going through the heads of the owls as all this stuff was going on underneath them. "What's with all these yahoos down there?"

The Social Justice Committee set up a blood drive. I gave after church. I think they got at least 10 pints of blood from the church as a whole. I gave a little more than necessary because the two technicians were a bit busy with other people to cut me off. I was still within the margin of safety, otherwise I would not be typing this right now. If I went way over, there was a ready supply very handy.

Right now, Salvador is flying about creating a bit of mayhem and the dogs are outside getting very dirty.

Sunday is my cartoon gag writing day so I will have pen and paper handy as I watch the Democrats debate.

Running Log

Ran 3 days in a row this week. All 5K. Ran 10.21 miles, burned 1342.2 calories and weigh 176 pounds.

Wednesday: 5K - 38:24
Thursday: 5K - 37:10
Friday: 5K - 31:31

Almost time to start training for an October marathon in Waco (October 28, 2007). San Antonio (Nov. 11, 2007) looks interesting. After looking at the website and last year's course map, I think I will run in San Antonio instead of Waco. It starts at the Alamo and has several historic missions and other interesting scenery on the route. As a 5+ hour marathoner, I need scenery. Waco has nice scenery too.

Perhaps build a real vacation around the San Antonio marathon. I'm a bit worried that San Antonio has not updated their website and registration has not opened yet.

I could try a challenge - 2 marathons within a month of each other. While I'm having this moment of insanity, why not add the Marathons of Texas Challenge?* Run 5 marathons in 5 months - Waco, San Antonio, Dallas, Houston and Austin! I think my family would have me committed if I did such a thing.

*Marathons of Texas - Dallas White Rock, Chevron Houston and AT&T Austin

Zany and mundane

If those were my underwear choices, I too would find the challenge of choosing invigorating. My favorite is the black pair with lightning bolts and fuzzy balls hanging from the hem. I assume Ernie or his wife does laundry more often than once a week.

I find this panel especially funny because Ernie probably wears perfectly normal clothing over that underwear. Mohawks, Vanilla Marley dreadlocks, unnatural hair colors, tattoos, multiple piercings, torn baggy clothes - yawn. Ernie and those like him are the real weirdos and much more interesting.

A lot of people don't like Ballard Street but I love the combination of zany and mundane.

Speaking of mundane, minus the zaniness: Mary is looking rather angry in delivering that platitude in the second panel. Could be that I'm not all that good at reading faces in real life and drawn ones are even more difficult. It's the more subtle expressions that elude me.

This Vera storyline has gone on for over a month! This is longer than Karen Moy's usual 3 week arcs. Saunders used to go 10 weeks on his arcs. I can only hope they were more interesting. Vera forgive Von and keep your independence.