Drivel that cannot fit in a single panel comic.

Sunday, December 13, 2009

Exercise Log: December 8 - 12

I ran, biked and walked 27.65 miles, burned 2357 calories and weigh 141.4 pounds.

Light week in terms of exercise because of Radio MASH. Very successful - collected toys for about 5,400 children. Once again, the Brazos Valley comes through.

Received an early Christmas present in the form of a Garmin Forerunner 405. Used for my 18 mile training run this morning. Collected all kinds of interesting data. I can run quite fast in short bursts even during the latter part of a long run.

Need to set the distance units back to non-metric. Accidentally set them to metric while playing with settings last night.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Icky Female Content

This post contains icky female content. If you're squeamish go away now. Here is a nice place: http://ihasahotdog.com/


I await menopause with great anticipation. Please get here soon. I'm tired of this monthly bullshit. 27 fucking years so far. Maybe I shouldn't be so angry and bitchy about a natural process but the copious amounts of Midol I've taken so far don't seem to be working. I'm in pain and I want it to stop. Please don't justify it with Old Testament theology. Adam & Eve ate the damn fruit and I get punished with this pain.

Wonder why women get so damn bitchy once a month? Guys, imagine this: starting around age 13, every month, someone visits your home, work or school and hits your nads with a baseball bat. After a while you might get a little pissed off at this and maybe give a hearty fuck you to anyone who says that this is natural and part of God's plan or punishment. Maybe get a little peeved when medical people and others don't take your pain seriously.

The over the counter meds suck. But because of some stupid crackers that lack self control I can't access more effective medicine without visiting a doctor who will probably say it's just female problems and not that bad compared to others. I am stronger and have better self-control - give me something effective.

At the moment I don't give a shit about the magnitude of others' pain. I just want mine to stop. 1,500 milligrams of acetaminophen and I still feel like someone is slicing my abdomen from the inside. I'm just pissed off that I've endured this crap for 27 years and there is no one I can blame, punch or shout at. At least the there is an entity in the bat analogy written above.

I don't know how or why I've endured this shit for 27 years. If I person did this to me I would have done something long ago. The pain will pass and I will forget about it until next month.

In about 5 minutes the office holiday luncheon will start. I have to make nice even though I don't feel nice. The annoying part is that this crap is joked about, trivialized and women are taunted if they express a bit of irritation because of this. Men injuring their nads is considered comedy gold but no one expects a man to be nice & polite while enduring the pain.

I'm in pain and I don't want to be nice. I just want it to go away and some space to be grumpy until it does.

Santa, I want menopause this year and an Evel Knievel stunt bike set.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Lunch 9/9/09

Healthy Choice Grilled Chicken Teriyaki - the package. Nice design with the exclamation point.

The reality after microwaving:


The apple stuff always splashes into the broccoli. Piece of broccoli invaded apple stuff compartment. No pineapple. Sauce off target.

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Radioactive

Neat trick. Adrian does her impression of the Virgin of Guadalupe. I wonder if that will leave a mark on the wall?


Adrian, take your fingers out of your mouth otherwise you will spread the flu virus. Should we call you "H1N1 Adrian"?

Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Excitement in Mary Worth!

I bet Joe Giella had a great time drawing that second panel. After weeks of drawing old people sitting around eating salmon squares he finally gets to draw some action. I hope this raid gets caught up in the Mary Worth time glacier. Days and weeks of glorious police action.


Santa Royale police could not afford a megaphone or helmets. Budget cuts.

How much protection does sitting inside the box provide?

Mary has been absent for 5 days.

Monday, September 07, 2009

Grr!

Awakened this morning while in the middle of a dream. A dream where I was yelling & throwing things in anger. I might have beat up some people, too.


My alarm went off. The dream dissipated but the emotions remained. Not a good way to start a day. Hit snooze in hopes that a few minutes would calm me down. Only led to more irritation because 5 minutes was not long enough. Hit snooze again but remained awake to try to get into a more positive frame of mind. Got out of bed at 5:40 am. Still angry.

I hate to think what these interrupted dreams are doing to my health.

Breakfast & a walk with Loki helped but still mostly irritated.

I don't get Labor Day off. Part of the building is a sauna (fortunately not my part). Got to listen to a reading of an e-mail about how Barack Obama is taking money from productive people and giving it to the poor and illegal aliens.* Pandora One refuses to work but I got around that. It's Monday. I ate over 800 calories for breakfast and was hungry again at 9:00 am. Getting these whines off my mind is helping.

*I don't mind populist anger. Populist anger led to some very good things - 40 hour work week, voting rights, workplace safety rules, minimum wage to name a few examples. Anger is the only thing that gets people in power off their butt. Fear of the people is good for those in power. Helps keep them in line and realize that their power does not give them the right to abuse people.

This current wave of anger worries me. Seems undirected. No goals or ideas other than Obama sucks, taxes suck, bailouts suck, government sucks, tan foreign people suck, liberal media sucks, I've got mine - fuck you. The tax system needs reform. The debt being left to later generations is alarming. Corporate welfare is more damaging than personal welfare. I've come to terms with the fact that my Social Security payments are for the benefit of others, some of whom I care about, and that I won't see any benefits. Well directed anger can change these things but all I see on television and on the Internet is a bunch of white people throwing temper tantrums. Anger changes the world - temper tantrums just destroy whatever is nearby. I worry because I'm nearby.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Today's Lunch

The package: Healthy Choice Honey Ginger Chicken
The reality after two minutes of microwave heating:
It tasted good.

Saturday, August 01, 2009

Exercise Log: July 26 - August 1

This week I ran, biked, walked and rowed 30.09 miles, burned 3086.9 calories and weigh 141.4 pounds.

Monday: ran 3.75 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: rowed 1,976 meters in 10:00
Wednesday: ran 2.44 miles in 25:00
Friday: ran 4.87 miles in 45:00

Thinking about the Cowtown Marathon in Ft. Worth, Texas or the 50K at the same location for my next long distance race.

Unintentionally Humorous Ad Placement

Click on image to enlarge.

Monday, July 13, 2009

Playboy of Charterstone

Original:
I bet Charterstone pool parties are quite awkward. Bare midriff in Mary Worth! I like Mary's pink pot and pearls ensemble.

Wordless:
In the first panel Mary gives a rude gesture to British readers and those who have spent many Saturday evenings watching Are You Being Served? on PBS. The gesture interrupted Delilah's blouse unbuttoning.

Liberal use of clone stamp and paintbrush.

Sunday, July 12, 2009

Mary Wordless

Another installment of Mary Wordless.

Original: Yes, that is an adult woman that Mary is dragging away from an encounter with another adult.
Wordless:

Looks like a funky dance in the first panel.
Mr. Smith is too excited about getting a phone number.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Atlas Farted

I came across a funny bit of headline on The Onion: Area Man Insufferable Jerk for Two Months after Reading Atlas Shrugged.

I'm reading Atlas Shrugged and afraid the same thing is happening to me. I'm halfway through and wish to extend a pre-emptive apology for any insufferable jerkiness that results when finished. I finished the part in chapter 6, part 2 where the directives (Directive 10-289) that will attempt to stop progress are read and discussed by Wesley Mouch (a bureaucrat - I guess naming him Rob Leach would have been too obvious) and his advisers.

I'm seeing parallels everywhere. Even in beer commercials. Francisco d'Aconias is the most interesting man in the world and he drinks Dos XX.

I bought the book at a garage sale along with Anthem and The Fountainhead. I read a bit of the Fountainhead in high school but got bored with it. I read enough to participate in the discussion and have been exposed to Objectivism. Received enough exposure to be repulsed by its extremity. Have libertarian leanings but I don't fully buy the rational self-interest stuff. It assumes humans are rational and does not address conflicts between individuals with equally rational self-interests.

I decided to give Atlas Shrugged a try and to be able to say that I read the book when disagreeing with the philosophy. At this point I have several thoughts and impressions I need to sort out. I tried sharing some with Walter but he has never been exposed to Ayn Rand and I love him too much to make him read this stuff. Then I remembered that I have a blog.

Rand could have made her point in half of the pages. My God, this woman is long-winded. I read the introduction by Leonard Peikoff and he included some development notes. Four paragraphs stating the same point: using Atlas Shrugged as a concrete way to explain abstract philosophy. Each of the four paragraphs has that thesis. I got the idea after one paragraph but maybe I process things a little faster.

I'm approaching this like a marathon. I have the map and elevation profile and have even ridden part of the route but I really don't know what it's like until I actually run the race. Having a general outline of the novel has lead to some frustration. I've often flipped a few pages ahead to see if any interesting bits are ahead or a break where I can put the book down. The image of the Monty Python knights screaming "Get On With It!" often go through my head while reading some parts.

I might enjoy the book a bit more if this was my first exposure to Ayn Rand. I know where this book is going and wish it would hurry up and get there.

Rand's greatest achievement so far with this novel is making sex boring. I try not imagine just how screwed up her sex life must have been. I'm glad she never wrote the screen play for an adult film. I imagine it would have been 3 hours long: 2 hours 50 minutes worth of speeches with cheesy music playing in the background, 10 minutes of sex with 7 and 1/2 minutes of that consisting of the actors jerking off. The conversations between Hank Reardon and Francisco d'Aconias are more sexual than the actual sex. A few of the scenes with Reardon and d'Aconias would be at home in Star Trek slash fiction.

Keeping in mind that Rand is trying to convey a philosophy helps me tolerate the one-dimensional characters and the absurd extremes between the heroes (brilliant, competent, high standards of morality) and the villains (stupid, incompetent, false standards of morality). 1,200 pages and she couldn't find time to flesh characters out to at least 1-1/2 dimensions. Many comic books do a better job.

Some people build straw-men in an attempt to bolster their arguments. Rand is building a straw-world. Easy to tear down.

I will finish this book, I will read the long-winded speeches, laugh at non-normal human behavior, tolerate long descriptions of emotions that characters cannot name, enjoy the absurdity and try not to draw too many analogies between the events in the real world and the events in Atlas Shrugged.

If a John Galt managed to organize a strike in our world, we would become deprived of achievements like Sham-Wow.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Data Collection

Mary begins the data collection phase of her meddle.


No, don't go there. Not much of a challenge - a bit of paint and clone. Who is this Moy & Giella and why do they tag Mary's apartment walls?

IE can find my site but Chrome has been having trouble. What gives?

Sunday, June 14, 2009

Exercise Log: June 7 - 13

Walked, rode and ran 43.01 miles, burned 3266.7 calories and weigh 140 pounds. Loki walked 4.75 miles.

Monday ran 3.60 miles in 35:00
Tuesday rode 4.83 miles in 20:00
Wednesday ran 5.18 miles in 50:00
Thursday rode 6.12 miles in 25:00
Friday ran 6.77 miles in 1:05:00

Have moved 911.77 miles so far this year.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Killer patio furniture

Another cut off head challenge. Gangs infiltrate Charterstone with their red bandanas and sky blue Sansabelt slacks. The young man on the left pouring the liquid is a member of a rival gang thus the scowl.


Both guys may be scowling because they are the bread to a Toby and Mary "oh for the love of god, please shut up" sandwich.

The roving patio furniture is more troubling.

Yes, Toby, we get it, marriage takes work. How many days will you blather on about it? Even the umbrella has become tired of your droning and is sneaking up on you to kill you. Go umbrella!

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Ride the waves

Included the original below. Is someone rearranging Toby, Mary and the pool furniture during this conversation? Yesterday, they were in the middle of nowhere. Today, they are poolside. The pool has also grown in their absence. Maybe the earthquakes are very intense in Santa Royale and the residents are used to it.


Santa Royale is built on a giant electric football field build by ancient alien astronauts.

Reading the dialogue as if sitting in a massage chair makes it funny. With today's soap opera comic strips you have to make your own fun.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

The perfect couple

The pool party has moved on.


Dialogue removal was easy for this strip. No foliage or background people to reconstruct. The plants and the people have become bored with Mary and Toby's conversation. Only the sniper hiding behind the rocks remains.

Monday, June 08, 2009

Pool Party sponsored by Sansabelt Slacks

The only pool party where no one wears a swimsuit. The pool has shrunk since the last party. In the original second panel, a dialogue balloon covered 2/3 of the man in the powder blue slacks' face. I decided someone at this party needed to do something that looked remotely fun, so I used a bit of artistic license. Nothing perks up a party like a man in slacks standing around wearing a clown nose. Plus, I had trouble with drawing a regular nose.


Delilah is coming.

Saturday, June 06, 2009

These are not the droids you are looking for

After Delilah refuses to participate in a trust exercise, Lawrence tries the Jedi Mind Trick.

Exercise Log: May 31 - June 6

This week I ran, walked, biked and swam 37.63 miles, burned 3355.3 calories and 141.1 pounds.

Sunday: canoed about 30 minutes
Monday: ran 3.51 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: biked 4.27 miles in 20:00
Wednesday: ran 5.06 miles in 50:00
Thursday: biked 5.82 miles in 25:00
Friday: ran 6.67 miles in 1:05:00
Saturday: swam .28 miles

Thinking about doing a triathalon in April of 2010. Need to work on my swimming and road biking.

Friday, June 05, 2009

Shadows!

I had nothing to do with the odd shadows. What sort of creature casts a shadow selectively? A Mary Worth!


I want the ability to selectively cast my shadow in order to create a sense of unease. A cool but useless ability. More useful: the ability to make home accessories disappear.

Delilah ought to reconsider her stay with Mary.

Thursday, June 04, 2009

Help my face has fallen and I can't get off the phone!

Mary needs to get the screws holding her face in place tightened. I expect to find circuits under her face like Yul Brynner in Westworld.


Why is Delilah glancing over her shoulder? Perhaps hoping no one sees her adjust her bra strap? Or scratching that itch in an awkward place? The horror.

Suffered from some mouse drift while cloning the curtains. That previous sentence would make a surreal tweet.

Wednesday, June 03, 2009

Mary Wordless

The clone tool comes in handy when removing dialogue from curtains. Original art on Mary's wall in the first panel. I call it "Be the Brand". I drew the foliage, too.


Three days on a single phone conversation.

Finally came up with a slightly clever title to this series, "Mary Wordless".

Tuesday, June 02, 2009

Mary Worth without dialogue

Another in a series of Mary Worth without words. I can draw better with a Wacom tablet rather than a mouse. Should have used the line tool on the stairs.


The crappy paint job does add an extra surreal element.

Maybe this will improve my Photoshop skills.

Hopefully this will become funnier as the story progresses.

Monday, June 01, 2009

Exercise Log: May 24 - May 30

I did the 100 push ups.

I walked, ran, and biked 35.28 miles, burned 2747.8 calories and weigh 142.1 pounds. I also did a lot of fishing and some canoeing.

Loki walked 2.98 miles. He enjoyed the fishing holiday.

Mary Worthless

Inspired by a comment of the week on the Comics Curmudgeon: http://joshreads.com/?p=3231 and Garfield Minus Garfield, I present Mary Worthless - Mary Worth with the dialogue removed.


So what is funnier with the dialogue removed - the facial expressions, moving backgrounds or my crappy photoshop skills?

I've been neglecting the blog lately. Maybe this will bring some focus back to it.

Saturday, May 16, 2009

Exercise Log: May 10 - 16

My poor blog is getting neglected because of the attention I've been giving the new things: Facebook & Twitter.

Sunday: 46 push ups
Monday: ran 3.58 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: biked 9.41 miles in 35:00, completed 172 push ups (42 max)
Wednesday: ran 5.06 miles in 50:00
Thursday: biked 11.59 miles in 50:00, completed 186 push ups (46 max)
Friday: ran 6.58 miles in 1:05:00
Saturday: walked/ jogged with Loki 1.26 miles in 20:15.89, completed 202 push ups (52 max)

Loki walked a total of 4.5 miles this week.

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Tonio K. - Without Love

My kind of church music:



Video lasts 3:33

200 Squats


So I have some lower body strength and endurance.

Saturday, April 25, 2009

Exercise Log: April 19 - 25

Since joining Twitter and Facebook, I've neglected the blog.

This week I ran, walked, biked and rowed 38.23 miles, burned 3199.8 calories and weigh 139.7 pounds.

Sunday: walked Loki 1.5 miles in 35:00
Monday: rowed 3143 meters in 15:00
Tuesday: ran 3.5 miles in 31:23
Wednesday: biked 3.49 miles in 15:00
Thursday: ran 3.5 miles in 35:00
Friday: biked 7.0 miles in 31:16
Saturday: walked and jogged with Loki 3.72 miles in 1:05:52. Threw in some plyometrics.

Monday completed 68 push ups (20 max); 168 crunches (60 max); 185 squats (64 max)
Wednesday completed 77 push ups (23 max); 212 crunches (84 max); 231 squats (89 max)
Friday completed 87 push ups (26 max); 248 crunches (101 max); 278 squats (113 max)

Monday jumped rope 7:03.60
Wednesday jumped rope 7:17.28

Sunday, April 19, 2009

Max Romeo: I Chase the Devil

My kind of church of music.

Max Romeo, I Chase the Devil. Video 3:30




Lyrics:

Lucifer son of the mourning,
I'm gonna chase you out of earth!
I'm gonna put on a iron shirt,
and chase satan out of earth
I'm gonna put on a iron shirt,
and chase the devil out of earth
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
Satan is an evilous man,
But him can't chocks it on High-man
So when I check him my lassing hand
And if him slip, I gaan with him hand
I'm gonna put on a ironED shirt,
and chase satan out of earth
I'm gonna put on a ironED shirt,
and chase the devil out of earth
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
Him haffi drop him fork and run
Him can't stand up to Jah Jah son
Him haffi lef' ya with him gun
Dig off with him bomb
I'm gonna put on a iron shirt,
and chase satan out of earth
I'm gonna put on a iron shirt,
and chase the devil out of earth
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
Satan is a evilous man,
But him can't chocks it on I-man
So when I check him my lassing hand
And if him slip, I gaan with him hand
I'm gonna put on a iron shirt,
and chase satan out of earth
I'm gonna put on a iron shirt,
and chase the devil out of earth
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
I'm gonna send him to outa space,
to find another race
Move ya with your gun
Mi sey fe lef' ya with your bomb
Move ya with your gun
Mi sey fe lef' ya with your bomb

Exercise Log: April 12 - 18

This week I ran, walked and biked 34.61 miles, burned 3153.6 calories and weigh 137.7 pounds.

Sunday: completed 13 push ups, 32 crunches and 77 squats
Monday: 3.83 miles bike in 15:00; 49 push ups, 109 crunches, 116 squats
Tuesday: 4.24 miles running in 39:37
Wednesday: 3.80 miles bike in 15:00, 56 push ups, 129 crunches, 148 squats
Thursday: 6.63 miles running in 1:05:00
Friday: 62 push ups, 145 crunches, 184 squats
Saturday: Run Thru the Vines 10K in 1:01:21

The numbers for push ups, crunches and squats are totals. There are rest periods between sets.

Links to programs:
100 push ups: http://hundredpushups.com/
200 sit ups: http://www.twohundredsitups.com/
200 squats: http://www.twohundredsquats.com/

Photos on Flickr for 2009 Run Thru the Vines

Monday, April 06, 2009

Big D Marathon

Short video of me at the finish line. Finished in 4:33:55

Saturday, March 28, 2009

Exercise Log: March 22 - 28

This week I walked, ran, and biked 40.26 miles, burned 3806.8 calories and weigh 139.7 pounds.

Monday ran 3.52 miles in 35:53
Tuesday biked 3.45 miles in 15:00
Wednesday ran 6.39 miles in 1:05:00
Thursday biked 3.76 miles in 15:00
Saturday ran 9.11 miles in 1:30:34

Next week I get ready for the Big D Texas Marathon

Monday, March 23, 2009

Prithee Thou Blow

Must figure out a way to work, "prithee thou blow" into a conversation today. Into a non-bedroom type of conversation.


So that explains the mysterious body noises.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

UU Goofus and Gallant


The context for this cartoon:

I try to be UU Gallant but sometimes, unintentionally, I behave like UU Goofus.
I might try a hidden chalices drawing sometime.

A Pair from The Hooters

My kind of church music. More of that damn 1980's (1985) stuff. I can't help it if I came of age during that time.

Embedding disabled, links instead.

Brother, Don't You Walk Away

All You Zombies

Saturday, March 21, 2009

Exercise Log: March 15 - 21

This week I walked, ran and biked 48.77 miles, burned 4617.7 calories and weigh 138.6 pounds.

Monday: ran 4.40 miles in 44:57
Tuesday: biked 3.67 miles in 15:00
Wednesday: ran 7.32 miles in 1:13:03
Saturday: ran 18.01 miles in 3:16:06

Walked Loki 7.42 miles.

I stayed on pace for 18 miles on a warm and humid day so I should be able to handle whatever Big D Texas Marathon throws at me temperature-wise on April 5. This is my last long run.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

I'm going to be different

Where did checker shirt dude come from? Did he climb over the Ted Stevens railing to nowhere?

I need to update Mary Worth watch.

Nobody likes those kind of people except Fox News Channel. Those kind of people get their own TV show.
Speaking of ham-fisted loudmouths, why doesn't any of them articulate why socialism is bad? I've heard the hysterics regarding how this stimulus package is taking the US down the path of European style socialism but not any reasons as to why this is a bad thing. I'm not saying it is a good thing, I just want some reasons instead of hysterical rants.

I'm just annoyed with the low standards of reasoning among the US punditry. People receiving a great salary to produce nothing. Really jump start the economy - tax these people 100% and redistribute that money to those who produce something. A bit of useful information, anything.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Actually Read UU World

The TV fast has opened up some time for me to actually read UU World. Instead of watching TV during breakfast, I read an article. I just finished the latest issue. I've been a member for a decade and this is the first or second time I've read an issue of UU World.

I found the articles interesting but not enough for me to remember in any great detail. The article about isolation in these economic times struck a chord.

The structure and tone of the magazine seemed vaguely familiar. Then I remembered, Highlights for Children. I spent a lot of time in waiting rooms as a kid and at one time my mother bought us kids a subscription.

UU World is Highlights for Adults complete with a suggested activity section in the back (discussion questions) and a pull out for younger people. All it needs is hidden pictures and labels like "John Brubeck, Boston, MA., Age 57" next to the poetry and art.

Not that this is a bad thing. I just found it funny.

A hidden pictures puzzle would make a good edition.

For the art director: I'm an UU and I draw pictures.

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Sister Rosetta Tharpe - Up Above My Head

My kind of church music.



Video lasts: 2:55

Tuesday, March 03, 2009

Clamato Week


I wonder if Guy and Rodd will address this monstrosity: http://www.boozingear.com/blog/2008/01/14/budweiser-clamato-chelada-and-bud-light-clamato-chelada-arrive-nationwide/

This kind of thing brings out my elitist tendencies.

Agnes has captured the essence of every success expert/ life coach populating twitter.

Monday, March 02, 2009

No Television Weekend

Too busy over the weekend to even think about turning on the TV. Found that I have gained an extra hour of sleep by not watching television while eating breakfast. I hope Joe and Mika (hosts of MSNBC's Morning Joe) don't mind. The extra hour of sleep is quite an enticement to make a ban on morning television permanent.

Skipping Adult Swim on Sunday allowed me to enjoy other activities. I made it to bed at a decent hour and even managed to write a couple of gags.

Still transitioning to the laptop. I need to get my contacts and some e-mails from the old computer. I updated my cartoon using Dreamweaver and managed to set up a site with FTP successfully on the first attempt. I have been using Notepad with a little help from FrontPage. I really like auto thumbnail.

Skipping the gym tonight to rest after the Armadillo Dash. My quads are a little sore. If it is not too cold I will take Loki for a walk.

Sunday, March 01, 2009

Ben Harper - With my own two hands - Letterman 3-10-03

My kind of church music:



Video lasts: 5:13

Lyrics:
I can change the world
With my own two hands
Make a better place
With my own two hands
Make a kinder place
With my own two hands
With my own
With my own two hands
I can make peace on earth
With my own two hands
I can clean up the earth
With my own two hands
I can reach out to you
With my own two hands
With my own
With my own two hands
Im gonna make it a brighter place
Im gonna make it a safer place
Im gonna help the human race
With my own
With my own two hands
I can hold you
With my own two hands
I can comfort you
With my own two hands
But you got to use
Use your own two hands
Use your own
Use your own two hands
With our own
With our own two hands
With my own
With my own two hands

Saturday, February 28, 2009

Armadillo Dash Results

My results from the 2009 Armadillo Dash 1/2 Marathon:

Chip time: 02:08:49
Gun time: 02:09:21
Gender: F
Event: Half Marathon
Division: F 40-44
Place in Division: 13 (out of 27)
Overall place: 344 (out of 604)
Age: 40
Place in Gender: 150
Average Pace: 9:50/M

Comparisons:
Male Winner: 01:16:17
Female Winner: 01:21:55
Field Average: 02:11:00
Linda Causey: 02:08:49 - 344 of 604 finishers & faster than 171 women.
Gender Average: 02:18:00
Half Marathon F 40-44 Average: 02:19:00

2:08:49 is a personal record.

Photos are on Flickr.com. Search ARMD09

Exercise Log: February 22 - 28

This week I ran, walked and biked 42.67 miles, burned 4222.9 calories and 140.4 pounds.

Sunday: ran 12.53 miles in 2:11:41
Monday: ran 3.48 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: biked 3.78 miles in 15:00
Wednesday: ran 8.39 miles in 1:27:26
Saturday: ran 3.62 miles in 35:33

Tomorrow I run in the Armadillo Dash 1/2 Marathon. I will attempt to maintain a 10:45 min/mile pace.

For those running Armadillo, Walter will post photos on Flickr.com. Search ARMD09

Friday, February 27, 2009

No TV: Days 2 and 3

Thanks to no TV, I read while eating instead of watching. I'm actually reading the latest issue of UU World.

Walter has it on during dinner but only he can see it. We are both eating at the table.

I've not noticed a major increase in available time. Maybe 15 - 20 minutes a day so far.

The weekend will be a major test.

Battlestar Galactica is my only exception to the TV blackout.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

No TV: Day 1

Ate dinner at the table instead of on the couch. We compromised and listened to the Daily Show and part of the Colbert Report. I did sit at part of the table where I could not see the TV so I let Walter know that he can turn on the picture if he wanted to watch. He chose not to.

I have a bit of a temptation on March 29. Family Guy will feature the Star Trek: The Next Generation cast as guest voices. They will play themselves. I love Family Guy, I love ST:NG. Talk about potential nerdgasm.

Would it violate my Lenten experiment if I watched it on hulu.com?

Lent experiment

I've never been a Catholic and did not understand this whole Ash Wednesday (just a funny name on the calendar for a day that sometimes fell on my birthday. Also found Palm Sunday rather mysterious as a kid)/ Lent thing until adulthood.

I find the whole giving up something for a period of time an interesting spiritual practice. I'm giving it a try this season for personal growth reasons. See what happens in my life.

I'm giving up television for Lent. Not for the reasons Catholics celebrate but to satisfy my own curiosity and possible growth. I suppose I should call it something else since I'm not Catholic. This seemed like a good a time as any to try this and the idea of Lent is what prompted my desire to do this. This would certainly cause me to evaluate my habits and lifestyle.

I believe I don't watch much TV anyway but it will be interesting to see what happens.

As a Unitarian-Universalist, I'm free to make caveats. (Just the sort of attitude that turns some people off our religion. Makes us sort of a religious Borg Collective.) I have to make an exception for the last episodes of Battlestar Galactica. I could record them then watch them after April 11 but there's only 4 episodes left.

I've told Walter about this and posted on Twitter. Stating my intent in public should improve my chances since the fear of public humiliation is a powerful motivator.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Birthday Party Photos

My brother and sister threw a great party for me. My sister did a lot of work and it was a great party. Thanks!
I ate my own head later.

Hot flash fund. I wore the t-shirt in Best Buy when I bought my laptop. I took off the button.

The photo that appeared on the cake. I was 18 months old.
Photos can be printed on the frosting and it is edible. Living in the twenty-first century is so exciting.

More pictures are available for friends and family at Walter's Flickr photostream

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Ray Charles - Bein' Green

My kind of church music.



Video lasts 2:44

Exercise Log: February 15 - 21

This week I walked, ran and biked 27.8 miles, burned 2472.6 calories and weigh 138.6 pounds.

I ran my long run today instead of Saturday so it will appear next week.

Monday: ran 3.34 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: biked 3.62 miles in 15:00
Wednesday: ran 7.08 miles in 1:08:53
Friday: biked 5.23 miles in 20:00

I have abs that would make some 20 year olds green with envy.

Friday, February 20, 2009

Product placement

The product placement only works if there is some kind of link or address where one could purchase a late 70's vintage rose t-shirt. I bet it was all sparkly when it was first pressed.

A hipster accidentally wanders into a Santa Royale restaurant and then gets the hell out. No irony here. These people are dead serious.

In less than 24 hours I turn the big 4-0. Will I no longer find Mary Worth amusing?

Sunday, February 15, 2009

Two Songs from Arrested Development

1990's Hip Hop in church?

My kind of church music...
The videos consist of a shot of the CD cover.

Man's Final Frontier



Song lasts 2:40.
Space ain't man's final frontier!
Man's final frontier is the soul!


Fishin' 4 Religion



Song lasts 4:10

Lyrics:

Grab the hook, grab the line
Grab the bait, grab the box and wait
Tackle and shackle the topic the faculty has chosen
Chosen by many, chosen by plenty, chosen by any
man or woman who understand
the topic that's known and
[Go by the dock] flock and clock the topic
as I drop my hook and get a bite
The reason I'm fishin' 4 a new religion
is my church makes me fall asleep
They're praising a God that watches you weep
and doesn't want you to do a damn thing about it
When they want change the preacher says "shout it"
Does shouting bring about change ? I doubt it
All shouting does is make you lose your voice
So on the dock I sit in silence
staring at a sea that's full of violence
Scared to put my line in that water
coz it seems like there's no religion in there
Naively so I give it another go
Sitting in church hearing legitimate woes
Pastor tells the lady it'll be alright
Just pray so you can see the pearly gates so white
The lady prays and prays and prays and prays
and prays and prays and prays and prays...it's everlasting
"There's nothing wrong with praying ?" It's what she's asking
She's asking the Lord to let her cope
so one day she can see the golden ropes
What you pray for God will give
to be able to cope in this world we live
The word "cope" and the word "change"
is directly opposite, not the same
She should have been praying to change her woes
but pastor said "Pray to cope with those"
The government is happy with most baptist churches
coz they don't do a damn thing to try to nurture
brothers and sisters on a revolution
Baptist teaches dying is the only solution
Passiveness causes others to pass us by
I throw my line till I've made my decision
until then, I'm still fishin' 4 religion

Fishin' 4 religion (11x)
Fish
[Believe !]
[Everybody in the house tonight...C'mon let me hear you say]
[Fishin' !]

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Exercise Log: February 8 - 14

This week I biked, ran and walked 37.45 miles, burned 3790.1 calories and weigh 139.6 pounds.

Monday: ran 3.24 miles in 35:00
Wednesday: ran 7.86 miles in 1:20:00
Friday: biked 4.38 miles in 20:00
Saturday: ran 10.28 miles in 1:46:12

I'm ready to take on a 1/2 marathon.

Great running song:
The Black Eyed Peas - Pump It

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Noah's Arrrrrk

This cartoon cracked me up. I found Noah keeping up both the pirate and pairs motif (check out the Jolly Roger flag) especially funny. He even has two parrots. Well played.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

System Of A Down - Aerials

My kind of church music:

System Of A Down - Aerials

Embedding disabled - click on link to watch video. Video lasts 4:03

Lyrics:

Life is a waterfall, We're one in the river, And one again after the fall.

Swimming through the void
We hear the word, We lost ourselves,
But we find it all?

Cause we are the ones that want to play,
Always want to go, But you never want to stay,

And we are the ones that want to choose,
Always want to play, But you never want to lose.

Aerials, in the sky,
When you lose small mind,
You free your life.

Life is a waterfall,
We drink from the river, Then we turn around and put up our walls.

Swimming through the void
We hear the word, We lost ourselves,
But we find it all?

Cause we are the ones that want to play,
Always want to go, But you never want to stay,

And we are the ones that want to choose,
Always want to play, But you never want to lose.

Aerials, in the sky,
When you lose small mind, You free your life.
Aerials, so up high,
When you free your eyes, Eternal prize.

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Exercise Log: February 1 - 7

This week I walked, ran and biked 42.44 miles, burned 3865.8 calories and weigh 140 pounds.

Monday ran 3.19 miles in 35:00
Tuesday biked 4.9 miles in 22:00
Wednesday ran 7.41 miles in 1:13:31 - Tempo run
Friday biked 5.54 miles in 24:39
Saturday ran 9.12 miles in 1:36:18 - Long run

Sunday: 117 push ups total; 23 max
Tuesday: 152 push ups total; 32 max
Friday: 164 push up total; 34 max

Less than a month from the Armadillo Dash 1/2 Marathon.

Monday, February 02, 2009

Fashion Day in Comics

My eyes! Good thing Lynn is in the back because the sight of that sweater would cause her to faint again. I like the two layer outfit that Mary is sporting. I often dress like that for a morning run in cool weather except my color choices are better.

Pick the black dress. Don't think of the price, think of your retinas.
Vertical lines are supposed to make you look slimmer, while horizontal lines make you look wider. What do diagonal lines do?

A shout out in Agnes. Not really but I like to pretend.

Sunday, February 01, 2009

Mama Cass Elliot - Make Your Own Kind Of Music

My kind of church music.

Video lasts 2:46. Song fades out a bit too soon.



Lyrics:

Nobody can tell ya;
There's only one song worth singin'.
They may try and sell ya,
'cause it hangs them up
to see someone like you.

But you've gotta make your own kind of music
sing your own special song,
make your own kind of music even if nobody
else sing along.

You're gonna be knowing
the loneliest kind of lonely.
It may be rough goin',
just to do your thing's
the hardest thing to do.

But you've gotta make your own kind of music
sing your own special song,
make your own kind of music even if nobody
else sings along.

So if you cannot take my hand,
and if you must be goin',
I will understand.

You gotta make your own kind of music
sing your own special song,
make your own kind of music even if nobody
else sings along.

------------------------------------
This is a 52 part series. One song a week.

You can get a preview of upcoming songs by visiting my YouTube channel (http://www.youtube.com/user/LCausey) and looking at the Favorites tab. Not all the songs in my favorites are part of the church music series, some are there because I like them. I like the church music songs but I like the others for non-religious reasons. Yes, the Ray Stevens song is in the church music series.

Saturday, January 31, 2009

Exercise Log: January 25 - 30

This week I moved 25.84 miles, burned 2845.8 calories and weigh 140.9 pounds.

Monday: ran 3.45 miles in 35:00
Wednesday: ran 5.9 miles in 1:05:00
Friday: 2.72 miles on elliptical in 35:00
Saturday: ran 6.34 miles in 1:08:06

Sunday:
Push ups: 25 max; 91 total
Crunches: 166 max; 385 total

Thursday:
Crunches: 211 - got the badge to prove it

Friday:
Push ups: 32 max; 122 total

Was sick Tuesday.

Thursday, January 29, 2009

I did it!

211 crunches without stopping. 40 of them with a large dog standing over me. Now on to 100 push ups. Took three weeks to get to 200 crunches, taking much longer for 100 push ups. I think I am at week 10 of the six week push ups program.

Sunday, January 25, 2009

The Impression That I Get - The Mighty Mighty Bosstones

My kind of church music.




Video lasts 3:16

Lyrics:

Have you ever been close to tragedy?
Or been close to folks who have?
Have you ever felt the pain so powerful,
so heavy you collapse?

I've never had to knock on wood,
but I know someone who has.
Which makes me wonder if I could.
It makes me wonder if I've never had to knock on wood.
And I'm glad I haven't yet because I'm sure it isn't good,
That's the impression that I get.

Have you ever felt the odds stacked up so high,
you need a strength most don't possess?
Or has it come down to do or die?
You've got to rise above the rest.

I've never had to knock on wood,
but I know someone who has.
It makes me wonder if I could.
It makes me wonder if I've never had to knock on wood.
And I'm glad I haven't yet because I'm sure it isn't good.
That's the impression that I get.

I'm not a coward,
I've just never been tested.
I'd like to think that if I was I would pass.
Look at the tested, and think there but for the grace go I.
Might be a coward,
I'm afraid of what I might find out.

I've never had to knock on wood,
but I know someone who has.
Which makes me wonder if I could.
It makes me wonder if I've never had to knock on wood.
And I'm glad I haven't yet because I'm sure it isn't good.
That's the impression that I get.

Never have,
I'd better knock on wood.
'Cause I know someone who has.
Wonder if I could,
it makes me wonder if I've never had to.
I'd better knock on wood 'cause I'm sure it isn't good.

And I'm glad I haven't yet,
that's the impression that I get.

Saturday, January 24, 2009

Exercise Log: January 18 - 24

This week I walked, ran and biked 37.42 miles, burned 3413 calories and weigh 142.6 pounds.

Monday: ran 3.25 miles in 34:25
Tuesday: biked 8.78 miles in 35:00
Wednesday: ran 6.44 miles in 1:07:23
Saturday: ran 9.15 miles in 1:35:21

Sunday: Push ups - max 50; 170 total; Crunches max 106; 291 total
Tuesday: Push ups - 44; Modified - push ups 56; 100 total; Crunches 151
Friday: Push ups - 96; Crunches max 136; 331 total

Thursday, January 22, 2009

Creamy goodness

Ruthie performs a bit of civil disobedience that I could participate in.

Beetle Bailey goes surreal.
Agnes is becoming one of my favorite comic strips.
It is not pus, it is the creamy goodness within me emerging.

Monday, January 19, 2009

New addition

Mary Worth returned to her comic strip after a 15 day absence.

Our family has new addition, a cockatiel named Janie. He was advertised on Craig's List as a female but he has the coloring of a male. So far he gets along well with Salvador, not so well with Edgar. I will post pictures soon.

We are thinking about giving Janie a different name. It was not his original name. The person we got him from acquired him when her brother put a birdcage outside to dry and Janie flew into it. This is the fifth story I've heard about a cockatiel just picking a person to live with. Unfortunately for Janie the person is allergic.

Janie did come with a lot of accessories that I'm trying to integrate into the surroundings.

Loki's training is going well. Today he pretty much ignored the little yapping dogs from across the street even though they were in our yard and one of them nipped at Loki's tail. He looked at the little nipper and then turned away to sniff around for something more interesting. The neighbor's dogs are becoming way too territorial.

I live in an all-male household.

Sunday, January 18, 2009

Earth, Wind and Fire: Shining Star

Funk and soul in church?



Video lasts 3:16

Yeah, hey
When you wish upon a star
Dreams will take you very far, yeah
When you wish upon a dream
Life ain´t always what it seems, oh yeah
Once you see your light so clear
In the sky so very dear

You´re a shining star, no matter who you are
Shining bright to see what you can truly be
That you can truly be

Shining star come into view
Shine is watchful light on you, yeah
Gives you strength to carry on, yeah
Make your body big and strong, do ya hear me now
Born a man-child of the sun
Saw my work had just begun
found I had to stand alone
Well, bless it now I got my own oh yeah

So if you find yourself in need
Why don´t you listen to his words of heed
Be a tiny grain of sand
Words of wisdom, yes I can

You´re a shining star, no matter who you are
Shining bright to see what you can truly be
You´re a shining star, no matter who you are
Shining bright to see what you can truly be

Shining star for you to see, what your life can truly be
Shining star for you to see, what your life can truly be
Shining star for you to see, what your life can truly be

Saturday, January 17, 2009

Exercise Log: January 11 - 17

This week I walked, ran and biked 37.93 miles, burned 3770.7 calories and weigh 143.6 pounds.

Monday: ran 3.43 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: biked 4.24 miles in 18:41
Wednesday: ran 6.20 miles in 1:05:00
Saturday: ran 7.58 miles in 1:20:08

Push ups:
Sunday: 35 max; 125 total
Monday: exhaustion test: 46
Tuesday: 40 max; 130 total
Friday: 46 max; 152 total

Crunches:
Sunday: 61 max; 196 total
Tuesday: 66 max; 200 total
Friday: 87 max; 246 total

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

This day in history

On January 13th, 1854, Anthony Faas patented the accordion.


When the Mayan Calendar ends all accordions, knowledge of accordions and accordion music will vanish from the universe ushering an era of peace and prosperity. Not at all the cataclysm predicted by many.


On an unrelated note:

Some UU bloggers have asked what Unitarian Universalism can offer. Agnes' friend has a good set of suggestions:

  1. Teach me to be useful
  2. Teach me how to laugh with true joy
  3. Teach me how to make a really good pie

Monday, January 12, 2009

Join my army of hope starved sycophants

At age 14 I aspired to become a cult leader. Not a scary, Jim Jones sort of cult leader, but more of a Bajwan Shree Rajneesh (sp?) type. People give me money and stuff in exchange for a bit of happiness and hope. One avenue for achieving my ultimate objective - getting as much money as possible in exchange for as little work as possible.

Several factors redirected my aspirations:

  1. Lack of resources on how to become a cult leader. Nothing in the library at Spring High School or in the Harris County Public Library System. Too shy to ask the librarian. Allegedly, I checked out a book from my high school library on brain washing techniques and never returned it. I convinced the librarian someone else put my name on the check out card. I never dotted my i's with little hearts. That and I did not remember checking that book out or even seeing it on the shelves. The loss of that book did not become too much of a roadblock in my life.
  2. Very high scores on the introvert scale. Cults require people - lots of them.
  3. A lack of charisma, public speaking skills or the ability to exert a lot of control over my own life much less the lives of others.
  4. Can't fake it forever. Consequences of exposure too great.
  5. Lots of potential, not so much ambition.
  6. I actually care and have a conscience.
  7. Realized it was kind of a weird ambition and that I can affect the world in a positive way without minions. Minions would be nice once in a while. Maybe I can rent some.

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Icicle Works: Whisper To A Scream (Birds Fly)

1980's New Wave in church?





Lyrics:

Love come, Down upon us
Till you flow like water,
Burning with the hope of insight
Feathered, look they're covered with a bright elation
Stolen in the sight of love

[Chorus]
We are, we are, we are all just children
Finding our way around in decision
We are, we are, we are rather helpless
Take us forever
A whisper to a scream

Birds fly
In the eye of the faithless daughter
broken at the bitter end
Wasted, sacrifice for a new nirvana
Right time send us on our way

[Chorus 3x]
We are, we are, we are all just children
finding our way around in decision
We are, we are, we are rather helpless
take us forever
a whisper to a scream
a whisper to a scream
a whisper to a scream

(We are, we are, we are all just children
Take us forever
A whisper to a scream)

We are, we are, we are all just children
Finding our way around in decision
We are, we are, we are rather helpless
Take us forever
A whisper to a scream

We are, we are, we are all just children
Finding our way around in decision
We are, we are, we are rather helpless
Take us forever
A whisper to a scream

---------------------------------------
I think of these songs as something to play and listen to rather than sing, if used in an actual worship service.

Saturday, January 10, 2009

Exercise Log: January 4 - 10

This week I walked, ran and cycled 36.36 miles, burned 3541.1 calories and weigh 144.1 pounds.

Running and cycling:
Monday: ran 3.25 miles in 35:00
Tuesday: cycled 5.92 miles in 27:00
Wednesday: ran 5.35 miles in 57:01
Saturday: ran 6.30 miles in 1:05:54

Push ups:
January 4 - exhaustion test: 35
January 6 - max: 27, 103 total
January 8 - max: 30, 105 total

Crunches:
January 4 - initial test: 75
January 6 - max: 33, 123 total
January 8 - max: 41, 155 total

I will do the third set of push ups and crunches on Sunday.

I have entered the 3rd Annual Armadillo Dash Half Marathon (March 1) and the Big D Texas Marathon (April 5). I'm training for Big D and will run Armadillo as one of my long runs. I will have moved into a different age group by April 5. I will make the transition on February 21 so I will also run Armadillo in my new age group.

Surprised that I'm looking forward to turning 40. May have something to do with my level of fitness and the ease in which I was able to maintain a 10:30 min/mile on my run this morning. I felt I could have gone another 6.

Friday, January 09, 2009

Dog Training

Last night, attended the orientation session for Loki's obedience class. It went well but he will have to stay on the opposite side of the class from two of the other dogs until we know how he will react.

I look forward to the next 8 weeks. I'm working on my current assignment: teaching Loki to associate clicker with treat. I think he has it.

-----------------------------------------

I got up earlier this week. I'm able to walk Loki in the morning, make breakfast and lunch, get dressed and make it into the office close to 8:00 am. Do this for three more weeks and it will become a habit. Ugh. I've found that I have a major bout of sleepiness from 9:00 - 10:00 am. I might attempt a 15 minute nap to see if that helps. I have a phone and people walk into my office. Maybe I can get 5 minutes uninterrupted.

Hooray for the weekend. I can catch up on sleep.

Wednesday, January 07, 2009

Sometimes God is puzzled and horrified

Cool retro style artwork on Dorian Grey.

Very disturbing.
Odd question in the first panel. What book is the mother holding?
Cow has the best punchlines.
Barney Google finally makes an appearance in someone else's comic strip. I saved this one a couple of weeks ago meaning to post it sooner.