You are DNA. You're a smart person, and you appear
incredibly complex to people who don't know
you. You're incomparably full of information,
and most of it is useless.


Which Biological Molecule Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

My inner child is sixteen years old!

Life's not fair! It's never been fair, but while
adults might just accept that, I know
something's gotta change. And it's gonna
change, just as soon as I become an adult and
get some power of my own.


How Old is Your Inner Child?
brought to you by Quizilla

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
[logarithmically] 54%-off Offic XP Pro nuptial
function Johns
accipiter

I feel a redesign urge. I'm trying to resist it because I have not fully completed the current redesign.

I just need to redirect the urge elsewhere.

ACCIPITER!

Thnak you Nancy for having the funeral on Friday. I get a 3 day weekend. You have my condolences. I hope Ronald Reagan is at peace.

Hey, why didn't I get a day off when Nixon died? Ford may be the next one to go. Please have his funeral on a Friday or Monday.

National day of mourning for ex-presidents is a great incentive not to elect a president for a second term. Single terms equal more ex-presidents which lead to more national days of mourning when one dies thus leading to more three day weekends.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
linda causey, Don't drop dead at 9:00 am Monday!

I'll try not to.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
DONT BE SILLY TO PAY HUNDRED FOR SOFTWARES disappear realize
elyse
you look like an ape!

...and you smell like one too.

This week I ran 9.27 miles and burned 1319.3 calories. I weighed 169.6 pounds. I increased the incline on my Saturday run. It was a killer. I've weighed under 170 pounds for 18 weeks.

So far this year, I have ran 263 miles and burned 34,213.5 calories. My goal is to run 1,000 miles and burn 500,000 calories. That is just calories burned from running. I don't know how many I burn while lifting weights or doing other activities.

Last night Walter and I attended the Brazos County NAACP banquet. A very generous couple gave us their tickets. The speaker was terrific and the Marian Anderson String Quartet played a very challenging piece incredibly well. It is truly amazing that beautiful sounds can be made by sawing a bow of horsehair along some strings. At times the violins and cello sounded like different instruments. Sometimes they sounded like a flute and other times like the low notes of an organ. It was an amazing performance.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
craig vaccine
fiend bashful
bobette
becky
filipino

It looks like it is one and two word subject lines. Those require more thought to decifer.

I have a natural immunity to craig, therefore I don't need a vaccine.
A bashful fiend is better than an outgoing fiend.

FILIPINO!

A Unitarian Universalist walks into a fabric store and asks the clerk for nine yards of material. The clerk asks, "What are you going to make?" The UU says, "I'm making a nightgown for myself as a present for my husband."

The clerk says, "But nine yards is way too much material for a nightgown."

The UU says, "I know, but my husband would rather seek than find."

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Register M. Contains
Investor Update, CRHI Very Hot Monday worse
y stupidly stick with ur current job? copy plain chapter
One cup and you're up all night

Eek! I'm gaining weight. Hopefully, it is just a side effect of the monthly visitor. Okay, I have been eating a bit more than usual lately. Hopefully, things will go back to normal now that I'm getting back to my normal diet.

Maybe, I should not worry about it so much.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Hi, Nick. In this archive you can find all those things, you asked me.
Watch Out, Ur Girl Will Dump U itself carrying five

It is nice to see the Sumerian civilization is alive and well.

UR!

Salvador is in cockatiel attack mode. I will be typing and avoiding the sharp beak of doom.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
no growth then money back and u keep..
Freedom. Happyness. Joy! zoned
medications available w/o prescrpt10ns Laaser blutwurst paymaster
slow Speedy V1c1d1n Deliv3ry wound

BLUTWURST!

I'm back. I caught over 20 fish of various sizes. Ended up releasing them all because nobody likes to clean fish.

One of the fish finned me and I have a wound on my right thumb that will not heal properly. It hurts.

It was a good trip and I had a wonderful time.

Pictures will be posted eventually. Need to finish the roll and have the pictures developed.

Damn, my thumb hurts. The wound is where my thumb touches the keyboard when I type.

I need to keep a sense of perspective. There are men and women losing body parts and lives in Iraq and Afghanistan and I am bitching about a small cut I received on a fishing trip. Sorry about that.

Thank you to all the people who risk their lives so that I may live in some degree of safety. Soldiers, police officers, firefighters, EMTs, and others.

Thanks for your service.

I'm going fishing this weekend!

This week I ran 9.74 miles, burned 1228.9 calories and weigh (ulp!) 169.3 pounds. I need to watch my portions.

Spam names and Zen koans of the day:
Lindsey screamed in agony as Todd finally sunk his meat completely into her bowels
Notarize K. Healthier
We give this almost for freeeee! layman
Malcom, For fast acting relief, try slowing down
School bitchs want you! dodgers
OEM Software Ware.house. transite

Get in my boat, fish!

Thich Nhat Hanh on the Iraq prison abuse scandal -- Beliefnet.com

Interesting insights.

100 posts!
Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
half price Windows 2000 Advanced Server ektachrome
This svveet teeen is new on the web ezechiel enclose
you are a bad writer
give it a try for me pelsae!
Are you tired a lot

The spammers are dyslexic and been reading this blog.

I'm going fishing this weekend!

SPLASH!

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Confectioner C. Placer
Politicized R. Figging - RE:Lac you have one new message from angel was
Ileen, Never confuse motion with action.
Just Release: SNNW Expected To Explode. sparse
Big Profits Tuesday For SNNW adjoin
Get SNNW Tuesday For Big GAins saturate
Tired Of Losing Trades? Get SNNW Tuesday co
alameda arteriolosclerosis sheridan floc
Emotional Stability - 67% Improvement
Be a mighty warrior in bed Cmm - cigar widows
Welcome to the Drunk Y0gung world bright drosphila

This is actually two days worth. I don't know what SNNW is but it must be a crappy product if it has to resort to spam.

The spam has also lowered expectations. Imagine a product being advertised that only claims 67% improvement, especially a product claiming to provide emotional stability.

"Oh, she is only 33% psycho bitch thanks to this emotional stability product!"

67% improvement.

I'm tired. I did a minimal update on the website. I didn't want to let my readers (all 30 of you) down by not replacing the cartoon on the index page. The archives are a little behind but I will catch up on those tonight.

I was at a meeting that went way too long. I agreed to co-chair this committee. What the hell was I thinking? I really need to learn to say no.

Just say no.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Nothing to ponder today.

Rusty is laying in front of a fan and Salvador is drumming with his beak.

Life is good.

Unitarian group denied tax status

By R.A. Dyer

Star-Telegram Staff Writer


AUSTIN - Unitarian Universalists have for decades presided over births, marriages and memorials. The church operates in every state, with more than 5,000 members in Texas alone.

But according to the office of Texas Comptroller Carole Keeton Strayhorn, a Denison Unitarian church isn't really a religious organization -- at least for tax purposes. Its reasoning: the organization "does not have one system of belief."

Never before -- not in this state or any other -- has a government agency denied Unitarians tax-exempt status because of the group's religious philosophy, church officials say. Strayhorn's ruling clearly infringes upon religious liberties, said Dan Althoff, board president for the Denison congregation that was rejected for tax exemption by the comptroller's office.

"I was surprised -- surprised and shocked -- because the Unitarian church in the United States has a very long history," said Althoff, who notes that father-and-son presidents John Adams and John Quincy Adams were both Unitarians.

His church is just one of several Unitarian congregations in North Texas, including churches in Fort Worth, Arlington and Southlake.

Strayhorn's ruling, as well as a similar decision by former Comptroller John Sharp, has left the comptroller's office straddling a sometimes murky gulf separating church and state.

What constitutes religion? When and how should government make that determination? Questions that for years have vexed the world's great philosophers have now become the province of the state comptroller's office.

Questions about the issue were referred to Jesse Ancira, the comptroller's top lawyer, who said Strayhorn has applied a consistent standard -- and then stuck to it. For any organization to qualify as a religion, members must have "simply a belief in God, or gods, or a higher power," he said.

"We have got to apply a test, and use some objective standards," Ancira said. "We're not using the test to deny the exemptions for a particular group because we like them or don't like them."

Traditional faiths

Since Strayhorn took over in January 1999, the comptroller's office has denied religious tax-exempt status to 17 groups and granted them to more than 1,000, according to records obtained by the Star-Telegram. Although there are exceptions, the lion's share of approvals have gone to groups that appear to have relatively traditional faiths, records show.

But of the denials, at least a fourth include less traditional groups, the records show. In addition to the Denison Unitarian church, the rejected groups include a Carrollton group of atheists and agnostics, a New Age group in Bastrop, and the Whispering Star Clan/Temple of Ancient Wisdom, an organization of witches in Copperas Cove.

Some of the denials occurred because of missing paperwork or other problems, according to the comptroller's office. A few, like the denial for the New Age group and the witches group, were decided because their services were closed to the public, according to documents.

But the denials of the Red River Unitarian Universalist Church in Denison and the North Texas Church of Freethought in Carrollton, as well as an earlier denial by Sharp for the Ethical Culture Fellowship of Austin, were ordered because the organizations did not mandate belief in a supreme being.

The disputed tax dollars don't amount to much, but the comptroller has taken a stand on principle, Ancira said.

"The issue as a whole is, do you want to open up a system where there can be abuse or fraud, or where any group can proclaim itself to be a religious organization and take advantage of the exception?" he said.

Those who oppose the comptroller's "God, gods or supreme being" test say that it can discriminate against legitimate faiths. For example, applying that standard could disqualify Buddhism because it does not mandate belief in a supreme being, critics say.

Opponents note that the federal government applies less stringent rules for federal tax exemptions, yet manages to discourage fraud and abuse. They also question whether the comptroller's office has formulated excuses to discriminate against nontraditional groups, such as those that include witches and pagans.

But Ancira says it's up to the comptroller's office to interpret state law, which he describes as rather vague. He insists the comptroller never favors one religion over another.

"This comptroller, in particular, wants everybody on a level playing field," he said.

'Creedless' religions

The comptroller's office has not always barred "creedless" religions from tax exemption, said Douglas Laycock, a University of Texas law professor who specializes in religious liberty issues.

That standard first came up in 1997, when then-Comptroller Sharp ruled against the Ethical Culture Fellowship of Austin. In making that decision, Sharp overturned the recommendation of his staff.

The Ethical Culture Fellowship sued, claiming that Sharp overstepped his authority. Allied with the group in the ongoing lawsuit are pastors from a broad range of faiths, including Baptists, Lutherans and Mennonites.

Both the lower court and the Texas Supreme Court have ruled against the state's decision. In one opinion, an appeals court said the comptroller's test "fails to include the whole range of belief systems that may, in our diverse and pluralistic society, merit the First Amendment protection."

Strayhorn vows to continue the legal fight to the U.S. Supreme Court, if necessary. "Otherwise, any wannabe cult who dresses up and parades down Sixth Street on Halloween will be applying for an exemption," she said in a April 23 news release.

The Red River Unitarian Universalist Church, the 50-member congregation whose tax application was rejected by Strayhorn's office, has held services in Denison for the seven years. Althoff said his group includes "hard-core atheists" as well as "New Agey-type people."

But the lack of a single creed is a hallmark of Unitarianism, Althoff said. Instead, Unitarian Universalists have seven guiding principles, including "respect for the interdependent web of all existence of which we are a part," according to the Unitarian Universalist Web site.

The group also draws from various religious and philosophical traditions, including Jewish, Christian, humanist and Earth-centered teachings, but promotes individual freedom of belief, according to the Web site. It notes that Unitarians and Universalists have operated in the United States for at least 200 years, although the two groups did not merge until 1961.

It now includes about 40 congregations in Texas, and more than 1,000 in the United States, Canada and Mexico.

Despite its lack of a specific creed, Unitarian Universalism is as much a religion as any other, Althoff said. From his perspective, religion is not just about the answers to life's big questions, but also calls on people to evaluate the questions themselves.

"It seems to me that any [group] that is specifically organized to address and explore the issues of what constitutes the good life, both here and perhaps in the afterworld, would qualify" as a religion, Althoff said.

The Rev. Anthony David, lead pastor of Pathways Church in Southlake, said he is disturbed by the comptroller's decisions because it ignores Unitarian Universalists' belief that spiritual fulfillment can emerge in "different ways at different levels."

"It reflects an incredible misunderstanding of what a church needs to look like," David said.

Pathways teaches that God is a term that describes the source of ultimate meaning and purpose, but the church does not advocate a one-size-fits-all theology, David said.

"Creedlessness doesn't mean no belief or anything goes," he said.

Craig Roshaven of Fort Worth's First Jefferson Unitarian Universalist Church said he has followed the comptroller's decisions with growing dismay.

His group has tax-exempt status, but he wonders what's to prevent Strayhorn from revoking it.

"The comptroller's logic could be applied to any of us," he said.

Ancira said the comptroller's office has no plans for such reversals. But then again, said Ancira, "There's nothing preventing us from doing so."

Staff Writer Darren Barbee contributed to this report.
-------------------
I'm so embarrassed.

This week I ran 11.50 miles, burned 1533.2 calories and weigh 168.8 pounds.

I cut my Friday run short to go to a X-Box Lan party. Halo is fun with 8 people playing. The capture the flag game was fun. The Warthog and Flag make great weapons. I ran over a few people with the Warthog and a friend killed a couple of people with the flag.

Walter is very gifted with the sniper rifle. A sniper rifle in a video game not a real sniper rifle. That comment is for Homeland Security. We are law abiding citizens that happen to partake in somewhat violent video games. That violence does not extend into the real world.

Protect your own damn children from violent video games. The games have ratings. Use them and firmly say no when your brat begs for the game. The majority of video gamers are adults. Deal with it.

AHHH!

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
[Rosanna] Do NOT delete it immidiately, Henderson Margaux
Nefariously H. Perilous
Gage, The artist who aims at perfection in everything achieves it in nothing.

Rosanna, Rosanna

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Goa C. Settling
Haha, U Have A Real Small Pe--nis psammoma egosim vasant
This is are V1R-G1NS WORLD! Topeka
Oh no... no... dady (cowpoke)
Here's what you're looking for..........whitman
Asymmetrically A. Belle - Stupid Girl Tripple Anal

TOPEKA!

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
I'm bored with this life
methionine
warmth OFFsHORE SOURCE of Software CDs omicron
This is are V1R-G1NS WORLD! mutinies
Belinda, If you don't have time to do it right, when will you have time to do it over?
You may do everything, but remember that ... quaintnessinductee
200% Profits Expected With CRHI, Thursday wharfage

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Diann, The ability to be in the present moment is a major component of mental wellness.
do you have an orgasm in the picture?
Don't be a fool to spend hundred on software, I can help carving

AAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!

Goofy spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Sherlock, Ability is poor men's wealth
Shawnee, Successful action tends to become an end in itself
be strong - be a men! arson

Great googly moogly

Take the Cicada Test!

Check out the storm damage. Bonham Park is now Bonham Field.

I feel lucky that my home was undamaged despite the proximity of the tornado. I was merely inconvenienced.

I hesitate to use the term blessed or thank God for my safety. It sort of implies that I deserve some favor over another person. The people who had their homes damaged or destroyed could very well be morally and spiritually better than me. They are just as worthy of safety as I am. This sort of event causes me to cast doubt upon the concept of a personal God that is actively involved in the everyday affairs of humanity. This concept is often tied to the idea that this personal, active God is also compassionate and loving and does not wish for his children to suffer. Those two ideas tied together really cause me to doubt. I believe in the existence of God but not as defined by religions with which I am familiar. I do not have the vocabulary to define God and the concept is too large to define.

God is everything. Love and hate. Good and evil. Peace and war. Creation and destruction.
Sin and virtue. Dark and light. Spiritual and material. Meaningful and random.

Sounds a bit Taoist. It helps me make sense of it.

The people whose homes were destroyed or damaged seem grateful to be alive. I suppose one could thank God for that.

I count my blessings only to give me perspective and happiness. Some blessings are gained by my efforts and others are received without any regard to personal merit. I am grateful for both. Some curses are received because of my efforts and others are received without regard to personal merit. I only appreciate those as a reminder of how good I have it and to learn from the curses caused by my own mistakes or stupidity.

Shalom.

Cool Gun. It looks very Star Trek.

This week ran 15.03 miles, burned 2014.2 calories and weigh 166.6 pounds.
I had some extra time this week so I ran more.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Janice, The ancestor of every action in a thought

Don't call me Janice.

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
Musses T. Alertness
Pattie, Happiness is an expression of the soul in considered actions.

High and Dry

There was a bit of nasty weather very early this morning. The dogs were not happy. Rusty slept in the bathroom and the Bassets slept in the garage. Salvador rearranged his cage.

Salvador remodels quite a bit. He also knows quite a few showtunes and spends a lot of time looking at his reflection and preening. He especially likes looking at his relfection in the toaster. He even climbs on top of the toaster to look for his good looking friend. The toaster is covered when not in use. Burned bird turd emits a nasty smell. It also screws up the flavor of pop-tarts. I only know about the flavor distortion of pop-tarts secondhand. I prefer my pop-tarts untoasted.

Everyone made it through the storm. One of our trees lost a large branch and the streets are not fully drained. Less than a mile from the house a tree was uprooted and road signs were mangled. It looked like the work of a downburst.

A downburst is where a stong wind stomps on the ground damaging your trailer. A tornado is a strong wind that whirls and forms a funnel and rips apart your trailer. Either way, a trailer has been lost.

Oddly enough, the trailer next to the house with the uprooted tree and mangled road signs appeared to be undamaged.

It is still dark and the street lights are still on. I saw some automatic sprinkler systems running. I guess 5 to 8 inches of rain was not enough.

It is very gray and depressing outside. It intensifies the flourescent lighting in my office.

UGH!

Spam names and Zen Koans of the day:
I tried hard to untie myself

Not much today in terms of creativity and orginality. The new tactic of transposing letters is quite annoying.

Why can't spammers be sent to Abu Gharib? They could use a little humiliation.

Goofy spam names and Zen koans of the day:
Tamper R. Weekend
Forego V. Jockeyed: Lac, Greetings, white man:)
Oliver, Looking back, I have this regret, that too often when I loved, I did not say so.
Hydr0c0d0ne and V1c0d1n whistle
Keep on time watches from Rolex finch

Atticus Whistle Finch

Goofy spam names and Zen koans of the day:
inducible major
yuk Hewett

Not much today. Maybe the light of scrutiny and mockery is scaring them off.

BWAHA!

I ran 6.52 miles, burned 1060.7 calories and weigh 165.2 pounds. I did not run today because I was visiting my mother-in-law. It was a wonderful visit. I enjoyed it very much.

Goofy spam names and subject lines of the day (yes, I actually receive these):
Organism R. Worthiest
Jaqueline, New faces have more authority than accustomed ones.
[Lizzie] Check picture, Chester Fay
Do you wanna look something you never seen before? So read. fanaticism heckle

Maybe it is not spam, maybe Zen Buddhist Monks are sending koans to every e-mail address in the world. Some of these things read like Zen koans.

SHAZAM!

Goofy spam names and subject lines of the day:
Showboat I. Orchestral
Arranges D. Sulfide
Sometimes it happens.Read it.mutinies empire
:-) Just do her! numbed

Goofy spam names and subject lines of the day:
Bankruptcies Q. Piper - Lac, lambda othant clamorous advance bellum soothsay haydn
Numbers Vasquez
Cristal Wilkie - Morton, I act tall!

Portzerbie!

Local radio sucks.

We have light suck, country suck, Texas country suck, a mix of suck, classic suck, modern rock suck, community suck, public suck, religious suck, Tejano suck and top 40 suck.

The classic suck station removed the local morning deejays for the Walton and Johnson Show. I have the radio on to hear music not chatter. If I wanted to hear talk I would listen to NPR. At least NPR chatter is interesting.

DJs are not funny.
DJS ARE NOT FUNNY!
I could go to any elementary school playground and witness a greater display of wit.

Just play the damn songs, tell me what the songs were, read the weather and give me a brief traffic report then shut the @#$%! up and play music. Preferably music that does not suck.

Rock music from the late 1980's does not constitute classic. Stop playing that song from Jet. They have another song out, try playing that.

Call your morning show something besides "The Zoo" Stop cutting off the guitar solo at the end of Prince's "Let's Go Crazy"

DJs are not funny.

Crank Yankers employs professional comedians and actors to make their crank calls. These are funny plus there are puppets. It is lame and stupid when a local DJ tries to make a crank call. Stop it. Just play some music. Preferably something that does not suck.

DJs are not funny.

If I wanted to know about what was on television last night, then I would have watched television last night. Stop trying to pass off material from professionals as your own. I watch a lot of stand up comedy, I can recognize the joke. Stop reading jokes you got from a e-mail joke list. I am subscribed to the same joke lists. The same goes for Weird News. Just play the damn songs. Preferably songs that do not suck.

DJs are not funny.

Limit Led Zepplin to one song a day. Play more Jethro Tull. Don't limit Beatles songs to just 4:00 on Friday. Choose to play Beatles songs that do not suck. There are a lot of them, so I don't understand why the classic suck station insists on playing "Rocky Racoon" exclusively.

DJs are not funny.

Stagger the commercial breaks among the radio stations. 10 radio stations and they have commercial breaks at the same time. I know you have to pay bills but why does everyone have to do it at the same time.

Never put children on the air. Never put children on the air. Never put children on the air. They are not cute and are just as witty as the DJs (who incidently, are not funny) but much less articulate. Never play a request from anyone between the ages of 9 and 17. They have no taste in music. As an adult, I have tried to listen to some of the songs I liked at those ages. I was horrified. My parents had more patience than I gave them credit for. Ratt, Quiet Riot, Poison, Motley Crue, and Twisted Sister (Your gonna burn in hell is a decent song), oh dear god. What was wrong with me?

I also wore parachute pants when I was a child. I acted, thought and dressed as a child. Now that I am an adult I am both amused and horrified by my childish ways. I have tried my best to put them aside.

In small doses, fart jokes are funny. Nobody really outgrows that.

When is that damn final episode of Friends going to air so that Americans can get on with their lives?

DJs are not funny.

I am grateful for the blessings of internet radio. I am able to confine my exposure to suck to my drive time. My tape player is broken. I don't have a CD player in the car. Headphones are illegal.

DJs are not funny.

Most bizarre spam subject line:
He held his prick there for minutes as he simply rotated (my e-mail address)

The spammers are using random words in subject lines to get past the filters. That one is almost intriguing enough to open.

Goofy spam names and subject lines of the day:
S_u_per V|@gr@ tomahawk carpeting
They do it and they are happy. haplessly
Precursor R. Spiritless
Wronged Q. Job
Chickpea M. Cronin

CHICKPEA!

Drama in the office. Yeehaw!

Friends, the television show sucks. I don't care about the fact the last episode is airing. No amount of hype can make me care.

I'm sitting at the desk of a shorter person. She has one of those below the desk keyboard platforms. It is nice and ergonomic for her but it is uncomfortable for me. Not really uncomfortable just a bit different. I like to be closer to the desk and this keyboard platform prevents me from doing so. I does keep my hands in a better position.

I still don't care about Friends. The damn story is even on the BBC World Service Radio.
---------------------------------------------------------
Lynndie England is an embarrassment to the United States. Her actions have not only humiliated Iraqis but has further endangered the lives of other Americans in Iraq. She will claim that she was following orders or that she was not properly trained. How to treat other humans beings is training one gets before joining the army.

She is at Ft. Bragg because she is pregnant. Perhaps, she should have an abortion or have the baby taken away from her soon after birth.

She was not properly supervised will probably be another excuse. Since when does an adult need supervision when it comes to treating humans as humans? This is not surfing the web or playing computer games while the boss is away, this is about the proper treatment of other human beings.

What sort of dumbass takes pictures of themselves committing crimes? I guess the army has to take just about anyone willing to volunteer. With that policy one is bound to attract a few dumbasses.

All the people involved in the prisoner abuse should be punished and steps taken to make sure it does not happen again.

Would it have killed the president to say, "I'm sorry"? Speaking on Arabic television is a great first step but if I were president I would have learned the phrase, "I'm sorry about the abuse of prisoners in Iraq and I will make sure it does not happen again" in Arabic. The rest of the interview could be in English but at least learning enough Arabic to make an apology would have sent a really strong message.

I'm nobody so I can spout all the opinion I want without affecting anything.

WASABI!

I am stunned.

Somehow, I failed to receive the memo that a class was not being offered. I found out today, during the last week of regular classes that this class was not being offered and therefore not meeting.

My brain hurts.

Every Tuesday and Thursday this semester I have been going into a classroom and turning on some equipment so that the class can be offered in two locations. I have been receiving phone calls from operations telling me to connect. I've had to run in between classes to make this connection. There was somebody at the other end doing the same thing. 3 months of making sure that connections were made and I finally find out that the @#$@%!!!!!! class was not being offered in the first place!

ARGH!

This past weekend I've been experiencing synchronous moments.

I've never thought about Alexander Hamilton before. After thinking about him, a book about him appears on the Barnes and Noble website. I went there to update my affiliate links.

I ranted about the EID stamp and then I see an article about the designer of that stamp in this month's Psychology Today. What led to the rant was a forwarded e-mail that I received. The e-mail was full of stupid statements. Muslims have committed acts of terrorism. So have Christians, Jews, pagans and athiests. The designer of the stamp is repelled by the extremism in Islam today. He even avoids Mosques because they have become too political. His son has walked away from the religion because of the extremism. I don't think this is what the prophets wanted.

Religion is a paradox. A source of great beauty and inspiration and a source of great violence and ignorance.

May all beings be safe.
May all beings live at ease.
May all beings be free.
May all beings have good health.
May all beings be.

While sitting at Sonic waiting for my order to arrive, I was looking at the new $10 bill. I was thinking damn, Alexander Hamilton is hot. Seriously, he was one good looking guy. It could have been an exceptionally flattering portrait but there is only so much one can do about ugly. Alexander Hamilton had to have been quite handsome. Look at George Washington, the artists did the best they could but he still looks kind of dorky. All the other founding fathers on the various US bills look ordinary despite the work of the best engravers in the world. Alexander Hamilton on the other hand has classic movie star good looks. Strong jaw, great eye line. Damn, he was just good looking. If you don't believe me, look at a US $10 bill sometime. Really look at Alexander Hamilton.

Here is a picture:


That is one hot founding father.

AARON BURR!

This week I ran 11.50 miles, burned 1729.5 calories and weigh 167.4 pounds.

I ran in a different gym. There was a church workshop in one of the meeting rooms at this gym and we were given one day access.

The meeting was productive and I had a good run.

One of Salvador's favorite movies is The Birdman of Alcatraz, starring Burt Lancaster. Salvador loved the canary sounds. Now he is demanding more movies featuring bird sounds.

Thanks to the workshop, the dogs will not get their monthly bath. The dogs are happy about this.

Now, I'm going to review some websites for my awards program. I'm starting to catch up.

CHIRP!

Muslims believe that Jesus is one of many prophets before Muhammed (pbuh). Jesus is revered by Muslims.
They do not believe that he is divine.

Anyway the EID stamp has been out for three years. It commerates the end of Ramadan which falls at a different time each year due to the Islamic calendar being based on a lunar cycle. Recently, it has occured near the Christmas holidays.

Of course with the way Christmas is going the Christmas holidays start in October and end December 31.

American Christians have their religious Christmas stamp, there is a secular Christmas stamp and a Hannakuh stamp. If the USPS feels that there is a demand for a EID stamp from American Muslims then they can issue it.

Personally, I'm finding Buddhism more and more appealing everyday. There are no Buddist terrorists. The worst thing that could happen to you around a Buddist is getting burned if you happen to be standing too close to a monk that decides to set himself on fire. The monks that do that sort of thing have the courtesy to clear the area before lighting up.

No Buddhists do not worship Buddha in the way that Christians, Jews and Muslims worship God.

SHALOM!

Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema
Itchy skin may be eczema

Mood: bored
Music: Radioio Pop
Weather: Cloudy
Feet: two

WASABI!

Clarence is a chicken that is looking up. The cartoon is from a bird's eye perspective.



WASABI!

AAAAHHHH!!!!! I'm feeling paranoid.

I received this in e-mail:
----------------------------------------------------------------
Someone who knows you has just begun the process of sharing experiences and opinions about you in our online community.

This email message is not spam.

This email message was sent to you as a direct result of the actions of a user at our website. If this email message was delivered to your spam or bulk email folder please notify your ISP or spam filtering company regarding this mistake on their part.

To view this posting use this link:

LINK DELETED
----------------------------------------------------------
So I visit the link and find that a couple of someones have been sharing experiences and opinions. Eek! I don't know what they are saying or how to go about finding out what they are saying. Some claim to know me professionally, others socially and others decline to comment.

Then again, this could just be a way to get money from me. There are various levels of memberships. I'll try to sign up for a free membership and see if I can read the comments or see if there are any actual comments.

People with small minds talk about people
People with good minds talk about things
People with great minds talk about ideas
People with extraordinary minds keep their @#$%! mouth shut!

WASABI!

This week I ran 11.17 miles, burned 1566.7 calories and weighed 167.8. BMI in the normal range. Today's run was a bit tough. Probably had something to do with the empty stomach. Apex protien cookies taste great and Gatorade really works wonders when the electrolytes and blood sugar is low.

The weather is cloudy with light rain and pleasant temperatures.

The windows are open and fans are on. It is good to cool the house with nature. Nature does not cost money, unless you are in a state or national park.

I had to remove Daisy's collar. It rubbed her hair off at the base of her throat just past the droopy skin. It did not damage the skin. The hair is starting to grow back. I will have to find a bigger collar for her. It is hard to get a good measurement on a Basset Hound's neck because of all the loose skin.

Here is a picture of Harley at the Ol Army Gentlemen's Society Sausage for a Cause.
http://www.ol-ags.com/gallery/album03/res42385
http://www.ol-ags.com/gallery/album03/res42391
http://www.ol-ags.com/gallery/album03/res42399
The banner Harley is wearing says Follow me for Sausage.

Appropriate that a sausage shaped dog is selling sausages. A daschund would be more appropriate since they are known as weiner dogs but who can resist the sad soulful eyes of a Basset Hound. Besides the gentlemen were selling sausages not weiners.

SNAUSAGES. (If you know what that is from then you have been watching too much VH-1)

I feel like burning or slashing the bottom of my left foot. It has been itching for two weeks now. I put athelete's foot lotion on it daily but that is not working. Only scratching and drawing blood seems to bring any relief.

I also have a itchy rash on my left knee. Maybe it is time to visit a medical professional. I am in a HMO. It is one of the best rated HMO's in the country but still there is a bit of bureaucracy.

Maybe I should try some stronger over the counter stuff. I just really hate the process at my HMO. I can't just set up an appointment with a dermatologist, I have to get a referral from my primary physician. In order to do that I have to set up an appointment to see him. He is a nice guy and a good doctor but I just don't enjoy going through middlemen.

The primary doctor may be perfectly capable of diagnosing the problem. He will write a prescription. I'll take it and see if it clears up. If it doesn't, it is back to the primary doctor to get a referral to the specialist.

I could just go to Home Depot and get a power sander. That would get rid of the itchy stuff. It would get rid of a few layers of skin but skin does grow back.

A blog entry about my skin problems. Oh boy, my life is ever so interesting.

WASABI!

Recipe Cards from the 1971 Betty Crocker Library.

This is my latest longer term humor project.

WASABI!

Ten reasons to become a Unitarian-Universalist (no particular order):

1. No Lent
2. Everyone is saved
3. Good coffee and conversation
4. Process theology: a theology for the long-winded
5. Old people that maintain their vitality
6. Fire! Fire! Fire!
7. A place where Baptists and Buddhists intersect
8. Holy cow! Most of these religions believe pretty much the same things
9. Get to know the non-bleeding, non-suffering Jesus
10. Nobody is perfect, not even God

That, my friends, is my elevator speech.

WASABI!

Am I A Mutant, or What!: A FoxTrot Collection

What.

This week ran 11 miles, burned 1507.3 calories and weighed 167.3.

The current issue of UU World has an article about blogs. UU's like to blog. I'm a UU and I like to blog. Mainly it is to sharpen my writing skills. I hope to write longer humorous essays. Drivel that cannot be expressed in the single panel comic format. I might write about religion but it is not the primary focus.

Here are some UU blogs:
www.universalistchurch.net/boyinthebands/
www.philocrites.com
andrealernermny.blogspot.com
stepbystep.blogs.com
unitarianuniversalism.org/adventures/
thechrysalis.blogspot.com
matthewgatheringwater.bogspot.com
www.onreligion.com

-----------------------------------------------------

I saw footage of Anderson (I need a first name) Cooper's interview with Don King on CNN's Headline News. Don King is supporting George Bush and it very excited about it. The footage made me excited. I got caught up in the emotion.

Don King needs to sell a line of alarm clocks. In the morning it would wake you up with: GO GO GO! WORK WORK GO GO! YOU ARE THE GREATEST! I LOVE YOU! GO GO GO! YOU ARE GREAT, GREAT, GREAT!!!!! GO!

That was the gist of Don King's endorsement of George Bush and his feelings toward Anderson (I should really invest in a first name) Cooper's interviewing abilities.

No, I don't take Anderson (Somebody give me a first name) Cooper seriously as a journalist. I suspect, Anderson (Insert first name joke here) Cooper doesn't either.

--------------------------------------------------------
Daisy and Rusty went to the park yesterday and Harley was selling sausages for charity.

WASABI!

I am awake. I got enough sleep. It could be the caffiene talking.

The greatest thing that Coca-Cola did was to add flavoring to its Diet Coke. Lime and vanilla are my favorite flavors. Right now, I am enjoying a Lime Diet Coke and listening to some Reggae music on 6 Music from the BBC.

Yesterday, I had a good workout in the gym.

It was Heartworm pill time for the dogs. They enjoyed the pill mixed in with peanut butter fudge. Rusty was happy with the evening grooming.

This morning, I was able to groom Rusty and wipe Harley and Daisy's ears. Daisy's ears are much better, she tolerates surface wiping. I haven't tried deep cleaning yet. I'll make an attempt Saturday.

Hopefully, our accountant got our tax extension in on time. According to a story on CNN the average tax preparation time is 28 hours. That is an indication that something needs to be reformed in the tax code.

I propose eliminating all deductions and credits. The first $25,000 of income is tax free. Nothing is withheld until the $25,000 mark is passed. Income above that is taxed at 2%.

Under my plan I would pay 2% of $800 (that is my approximate income above $25,000). I would send the IRS a check for $16. That is much less than I pay now, even taking advantage of every conceivable deduction. On the combined income a check for about $300 would be sent. That is still less than what we pay. That is a bit of a penalty for marriage, so simply eliminate joint filing. One taxpayer, one tax return. Those making $25,000 or less would not pay income taxes.

This is too common sense to succeed. Tax related professions would object (they could still get business from the self-employed or others that do not get a W-2), various interest groups that receive deductions would object, certain progressives would object because they believe that the wealthy needs to pay a greater percentage. That last objection can easily be remedied by increasing the tax rate at various levels of income above $25,000.

This plan would require just using taxes to collect revenue rather than behavior modification or encouragement. Also, spending would need to be cut and perhaps user fees assessed for some services (you use a service, you pay, if not, no need to pay). Income taxes are just one small aspect of the many taxes that are paid. Sales taxes provide a lot of revenue.

Since we file an extension, our outrage or joy is delayed.

WASABI!

The meeting was very productive and finished on time. I was in bed before midnight. This morning I hit the snooze 4 times.

Changed up the morning routine. Rusty is a bit irritated that he did not get his brushing this morning. I will brush him this evening. I'll give him a longer grooming. I hope he does not lay around being depressed. It is hard to tell when he is depressed.

I look forward to my workout after work.

I can still use a bit more sleep.

WASABI!

I got a bit more sleep last night. I don't know if I will get enough tonight. I have to attend a 3 hour church board meeting after work. I have cleared most of my schedule so that I can get to bed quickly after the meeting. The only thing that I will do after the meeting is update the cartoon. I hope to be home before 10:00.

I'm looking forward to the end of my term. I want to focus on other things within the church. I have enjoyed my time on the Board so far. After tonight that attitude might change.

There are much worse places to be stuck for 3 hours. A UU board meeting is not the worst. People are willing to suspend their lives for more trivial reasons. At least at a board meeting a difference can be made, assuming we have a quorum.

WASABI!

Why does morning have to happen so early? I never get enough sleep. All I need is one more lousy hour. That would be nice.

After coming home from a visit with the in-laws, I saw Rusty in the backyard and he looked shaved. Then I realized that I was hallucinating. What kind of weirdo would go into a stranger's backyard and shave their dog? I am that kind of weirdo. If I had the time and inclination that is the sort of crime spree I would go on.

Breaking into homes, putting up dishes, making beds, grooming animals, vacuuming rugs, mopping floors, put a six pack in the fridge and other household chores. I would leave evidence that the home had been broken into. I would get some satisfaction in messing with people's minds. They call the police to report the break in but nothing is missing and something got cleaned. On one hand they would feel violated but on the other they would be grateful for the household help.

If I was evil, I would break into a house and plant marijuana on the kid's clothes. Nobody is going to believe the kid when he/she says that they do not know how the drugs got there. "Yeah, right, somebody broke into the house and put this joint in the pocket of your jeans." That could really screw up a life.

Americans are already paranoid and easily spooked as it is. I don't need to add to it with any hijinks.

WASABI!

This week I ran 9.41 miles, burned 1288.8 calories and weighed in at 165.8 pounds.
I had a meeting that forced me to skip one of my evening runs.

Saw the movie Hellboy with some friends. Good movie.

Bought some old records at a garage sale. I never thought that the words, "Cool, a Les Baxter record!" would ever come out of my mouth. Until about 3 months ago I was unaware of Les Baxter. I've really been enjoying lounge music a lot lately. It is a 78 LP of Les Baxter. We don't have a turn table that can play that.

We scored pretty well at the garage sales. Not many sales because of the Easter weekend. Several estate sales. A lot of expensive funerals. That would be the only explanation for some of the outrageous prices on things. Estate sale as fundraiser to pay off funeral expenses.

After my death (certainly wouldn't want this done before then), I would want all my usable organs harvested and the rest cremated and the ashes spread out in various locations, Toledo Bend Lake, the Florida Keys, at a NASA facility, in the backyard.

Insomnia prevention and weight training is on the Google Ad banner.

WASABI!

Why do people insist on buying a bunch of scratch tickets while there is a line of people behind them trying to hurry up and get to work?

With so many choices in scratch tickets the purchasing process can be quite lengthy. I did not stick around long enough to see if this person was scratching the tickets while at the counter. That would have increased the annoyance factor. I just handed the clerk my money for the gas and ran.

Gas in Bryan/ College Station is $1.61 for unleaded. I might have to start biking to work. It is 8 miles. Maybe carpooling or public transport. I would have to get up at an ungodly hour to catch the bus. I hate getting up in the morning as it is. Anyway, it looks like it is time to investigate alternative transport to work.

Hapi: a festive treat. Hapi snacks for happy times.

WASABI!

This week I ran 10.31 miles, burned 1386.6 calories and weighed 168.1 pounds.

I just filled up a notebook, containing my work out log, that started on Dec. 31, 2001. I weighed 204.6 pounds.

I bathed all three dogs. This time, it was done outside. The bassets sensed that there was going to be some bathing so they hid among the bushes. Rusty got to be the first contestant. He did well and enjoyed the attention.

Harley shivered and drooled. Daisy kept testing boundaries. She is quite the crafty bitch.

I'm tired. I'm ready to spring forward and enjoy the extra daylight.

I'm ready to slap anyone who claims that we lose an hour. There are 24 hours in a day. There will always be 24 hours in a day. No hours are lost.

Stop being stupid.

BOOBIES!

This week I ran 10.19 miles and burned 1438.6 calories. Weight: 167.4.

This was a busy weekend. Took Daisy to the vet to have her ears checked. We want to cure this ear problem once and for all. Attended AggieCon and gained a boost of self-esteem. Spandex is a privilege not a right. Modesty is a good thing.

I had an attack of insomnia Saturday. I did not go to bed until 5:00 am and did not actually sleep until 6:00 am. Woke up at 8:00 am. I took a nap after church. I hope that will reset things.

While awake, I watched a lot of television and listened to Harley snore. I watched all four episodes of an SS documentary on the History Channel (aka The Nazi Channel). It made the same general point that all documentaries about the Third Reich make, the Nazis were evil and methological. I watched the last 45 minutes of A League of Their Own, 15 minutes of Trading Places, an hour of a documentary about a carving from Easter Island, an half hour of a documentary about a second hand clothing dealer named Luka from Zambia. I admired Luka for being able to count his blessings in the midst of his struggle to earn a living for his family. I pray that Luka will receive more blessings. I watched half a documentary about Lustron, a man had a brilliant idea, formed a company and that company was destroyed from under him by political corruption, greed and stupidity. The 2000 Lustron homes that were built in the United States are still standing. The whole thing was quite Dilbertesque.

I'm glad I have a selection of channels. Most of the channels had gone to infomercial but there were sufficient hold outs to keep me stimulated.

Here is a link to the documentary about Lustron Homes

BOOBIES!

Somebody forgot to warn me about this; today was morons who cannot rack their weights day at the gym. This comes about once a month. There were dumbbells, barbells and plates all over the place. I racked a few of the dumbbells. There are signs all over the facility that say, RACK YOUR WEIGHTS. Some moron left a set of dumbbells two feet from the rack. Another moron left a dumbbell across the facility. I racked that one because I needed it later. I also completed the extra two feet for the moron and racked a set of 22.5 pound dumbbells.

The tards who could not read signs, observe behavior or grasp the concept of putting stuff back where you found it were not in the gym when I was there. Like a blackhole, the only evidence of their existence was the stuff all around. I feel sorry the customer service person who is going to have to rack all those plates. Maybe some of the other regulars will rack the weights that they are capable of lifting.

BOOBIES!

The "Right to Life" people are on campus with their display of "Genocide Photos". Maybe in the back of their head they get off on these photos.

I don't know why these people bother me. Maybe it is the lack of interest in those who have already been born. Maybe it is the opposition to sex education and easy access to birth control despite the fact that would help achieve their objective. Maybe it is the habit of talking women into carrying the pregnancy to term but will not provide support, even vote for cutting social programs that would help these women keep the child. So few of these people are willing to adopt the children that they saved. I just think the energy and passion can be better used.

Abortion is not a great thing but it should be available as a last resort when birth control fails or when the mother or child will suffer terribly.

Maybe the whole thing is not about saving the unborn but about punishing women for having sex. How dare a woman avoid the consequences of sex.

I just think the world could be a better place if the energy and passion of the right to life people were directed toward eliminating poverty and ignorance.

BOOBIES!

This week ran 15.4 miles and burned 1939.3 calories. It was Spring Break, I had more time to run. Weight averaged out to 167.3.

I now own the cleanest bathroom in the neighborhood.

I was not mad at anyone, I was mad at the dirt. That is a corrpution of a quote from one of the funniest movies of all time, Mommie Dearest. The fact that I just made that statement is one of the many reasons I had my tubes tied. Joan Crawford is my parenting role model.

Harley is visiting a friend. Daisy and Rusty are enjoying the nice weather. Daisy will be going to the vet to have her ears checked out. Daisy is enjoying Rusty's company. A nice old couple.

Tomorrow, we are having a garage sale. We are trying to exchange crap for cash.

I just love Spring Break. I love working for a university.

BOOBIES!

What would Jesus do?

He wouldn't steal bandwidth.

I don't mind people using my clip art on message boards, blogs and online journals without downloading the art to their own hard drive. I understand that the software for these things is not geared for uploading images.

Lately, I've come across a fair number of websites (most web hosts allow for image upload) using my clip art without downloading to their own hard drive. Sadly, the majority of these sites are owned by people proclaiming themselves as Christians. Not only are they stealing my bandwidth, they don't even have the courtesy to include credit. aperfectworld.org in tiny letters is fine. That is what Jesus would do.

This image

has been quite popular lately. I often see it used as a background image.

It is a great image for conveying what Jesus went through to redeem mankind but it is not a good image to use as a background. Especially, with black text. One site faded the image (somehow it is still linked to my server!?!) and that helped and it was a nice effect.

I just hate to be partly responsible for the proliferation of aesthetically unpleasing sites.

It would be nice if people clicked on the button below, once in a while. Despite the kvetching above, I have really liberal clip art usage policies (otherwise I would have altered the images to sabotage those stealing my bandwidth) and unlike most clip art sites, I don't place a lot of advertsing all over the place and I don't have a bunch of voting windows pop up. I like to draw and I want people to get to the clip art quickly.

If you have benefitted from my clip art consider throwing a dollar or two into my paypal account. Thanks.

Harley is at work with me today. He is very well behaved and the ladies are petting him. He is sitting next to my chair looking at me with his big brown eyes. i can't resist petting him, so I'm typing with one hand and using the mouse with my left hand. That sort of thing helps build new neural pathways and keeps the brain from rotting through disuse.

Today is a half day. Then a nice four day weekend for Spring Break. The campus is quiet and the road crews are trying to cram a lot of work this week while there is less traffic.

The weather is beautiful today. Last night was quite a light show. The lightning was striking so often that the sky looked like a strobe light. The weatherman mentioned our street was in the most intense part of the storm.

Everyone and everything held up.

Whoever said that pets in the workplace increases productivity, did not do those studies with my dogs. I am more relaxed and forced to take more short breaks to take care of Harley's needs, maybe that is what increases productivity and reduces stress.

Listening to Radioio BEAT

Those of you who are using my clip art on message boards and on your blogs, how about dropping a buck into my PayPal account? You can find it on my home page and on the clip art home page. Thanks.

BOOBIES!

Here is a blast from the past. This a cartoon I drew in 1999 depicting a 10K race. I implied that sort of thing is not fun and that people who do it are crazy.

My how my attitude has changed. I would consider a 10K a walk in the park. I'm going to run a local 5K race in May. I'm thinking about taking Harley along. Then again, I want to try to run this race fairly fast. I don't think Harley could handle a fast pace for any length of time.

Speaking of running. This week I ran 8.44 miles, burned 1148.5 calories and weight averaged out to 166.

Today, Walter and I went to an exhibit at the local Natural History Museum. Researchers from the Texas Bigfoot Research Center were there to answer questions. There was a small exhibit and a small gathering of field researchers. Each of these people have seen an actual bigfoot. Actually, the term is North American Ape. Most of the sightings in Texas occur in the Piney Woods region of east Texas.

The field people weirded me out. To understand the magnitude of that statement, I will tell you this: I am a Star Trek fan. I've been to several conventions. I've have painted my whole body green. I know weird when I see it.

We looked at some other exhibits at the museum. We looked at guns, reptiles, fish, mammoth and mastadon bones, Comanche artifacts, shrunken heads, a voodoo doll, a hand of glory, a mummy and other things.

It was the Bigfoot exhibit that brought us to the museum. It was not too bad for free admission. I would have been very disappointed if we had to pay.

I think the North American ape is simply a species that is dying out therefore hard to find.

BOOBIES!

The city I live in is ranked 94 of 114 (small cities) in terms of crime. The Chamber of Commerce is not going to like that. The cities are ranked from safest to least safe. Check out the study.

Surprisingly, the southern U.S. had the highest rate of crime.

I'm sure a sociologist knows the reasons for the crime rate in the southern U.S. If not, here is a study for a dissertation or thesis. Heck, it could even get grant money. Just be sure to send me a cut. I'm not asking much, just 15%. Call it a finder's fee.

I'm a one woman think tank.

BOOBIES!

Walter has been cleaning out stuff and selling things on
Half.com

My senior prom picture was found. The glass in the frame is broken so I need to take the picture out. It screams 1980's (the picture was taken in 1987). I had big hair. Big 80's hair. I'm thinking about scanning it to post and have fun with. I would protect the innocent bystander (a friend) by pixelating his face. Actually pixelation would be an improvement. He had a really, really great personality. I wonder what he is doing now?

Right now, Salvador is nesting in my hair. My not so big hair.

Somebody in the room has let loose a fart (SBD) and is refusing to claim responsibility. I didn't do it and Walter says he did not do it (We are mature adults that take responsibility for our smells) and it does not smell like a typical dog fart and I don't think cockatiels fart.

Listening to Salvador whistle a toon. Now the little bird has become protective of my mouse. I can't use it without having little bits of flesh ripped off. The mouse reminds him of an egg that he has to protect.

00000 (That was Salvador walking on the keyboard)1 Now I can use the mouse again.

My life is uninteresting but that is a blessing in terms of the famous Chinese curse.

BOOBIES!

Bathed the dogs! Whew!

I did this after my workout. I did not want to shower until I was finished.

Harley was very uncooperative. Somehow he knew the filling tub was for him. It took two of us to bathe him.

Daisy was devious. She cooperated a bit better. She was cooperative while in the tub. Walter decided that I could handle her myself. He left the bathroom. That is when Daisy started being less cooperative. I had to call for help. After bathing Daisy and draining the tub, it looked like Chewbacca has used our bathtub. There was hair everywhere. We were amazed that a short hair dog could leave so much hair. Harley did not leave that much hair in the tub.

We discovered that neither dog cares for baths.

After the Bassets, I decided to work on Rusty's mats and give him a dry bath. Since this involves mostly brushing, he was most cooperative and appreciative. His coat looks a bit strange in places because of the mats that were cut off. He smells nice and looks great. He probably feels better getting the mats removed.

All the dogs smell nice and clean.

Everyone in the house smells nice and clean. Everyone had a bath whether we needed it or not.

All dogs got treats. All humans got a heck of a workout.

BOOBIES!

This week I ran 8.21 miles and burned 1109.9 calories. Weight averaged to 166.9.

I'm going to burn more calories washing the dogs. Yee haw!

Maybe this post will bump the two headed freak baby off the front page.

BOOBIES!

There are people who believe that Americans are stupid.

Here is some evidence supporting their hypothesis.

The letters are quite hilarious and can make you feel better about yourself. It is okay to be morally offended but one should be able to express outrage in a literate manner.

Instead of money going to the FCC, how about money going to education. The money would not go to schools but for tutors to visit the home of anyone that writes a letter poorly written as those on the Smoking Gun website. If people are going to have stupid ideas they should be able to express the ideas clearly and eloquently so that others may fully notice the stupidity of the idea rather than get distracted by the poor grammar of the writer.

I love the United States. I love a small percentage of her residents. The rest should kill themselves.

BOOBIES!

It looks like John Kerry is going to be the Democratic candidate for the presidency of the United States.

The good thing about John Kerry is that he is easy to caricature. My skills in that area are limited and I easily drew a John Kerry cartoon that looked like John Kerry. I'm surprised the National Cartoonists Society has not thrown their support behind Kerry. If he is elected, it would make the editorial cartoonists job easy as far as capturing a likeness.

John Kerry, senator, war hero, presidential candidate, human cartoon.

BOOBIES!

I was poking around the web for some information about the Electoral College to see if it is possible to get elected president of the United States despite not winning in a majority of states. It is possible.
Distribution of Electoral Votes

The number of electors per state is determined by number of Senators (always 2) plus number of Representatives (depends on state population). The popular vote determines which way a state's electors must vote. The winner of the electoral vote is determined by simple majority. 538 electoral votes are available, 270 are required in order to get elected president. Someone could become president of the United States by winning the popular vote in 11 states.

The lucky states are:

1. California - 55 votes


2. Florida - 27


3. Georgia - 15


4. Illinois - 21


5. Michigan - 17


6. New Jersey - 15


7. New York - 31


8. North Carolina - 15


9. Ohio - 20


10. Pennsylvania - 21


11. Texas - 34

A total of 271 electoral votes. The delegates for the two major parties are pretty much divided in the same proportions as electoral votes. For the Democrats it takes the addition of Massachusetts to insure a nomination.

A focused and well-funded Independent could bypass the party system and win the election. Focus on the 11 states mentioned above and if there are extra funds and manpower focus on one or more of the following states as insurance: Arizona, Maryland, Minnesota, Wisconsin (10 votes each); Indiana, Missouri, Tennessee, Virginia (11 votes each); Massachusetts (12 votes).

Note the absence of Iowa and New Hampshire from the above lists.

Feel free to use the above campaign strategy.

BOOBIES!

I participated in early voting today. The polling place was close to work and I did not have to set foot in an elementary school. Not that setting foot in an elementary school would keep my from exercising my voting rights.

The county is using a new electronic voting machine. The interface looks like a huge PDA. It almost looks like a toy.

The only weird thing is a dial is used to navigate on the screen. A dial kind of like a rotary dial phone. Fortunately there was a poll worker there to explain that to me because I instinctually tried to use the screen as a touch pad (the poll worker moved my hand away) to put in my access code. The next thing I looked for was arrow buttons or keys. Then I looked for a number key pad. The next thing I would have done is treat the flat dial like the pad on a game controller. I would have discovered the dial thing when I tried to use it like a pad on a game controller.

This dial design is almost like a Dilbert gag. I can visualize the meeting in which this design was discussed.

Engineer: These arrow-shaped buttons allow the voter to navigate the on-screen ballot.
PHB: Arrow-shaped buttons have points and a voter could get hurt.
Engineer: The points are blunt. Nobody will get hurt.
PHB: Points are negative. How about a nice circle?
Engineer: Circles do not indicate direction.
PHB: Why don't you put in a steering wheel? Varoom varoom.
Engineer: There is no room on the machine for a steering wheel.
PHB: Why don't you put in a dial? It is circular and spins. That would be fun. Voting should be fun.
Engineer: Even in the state of Texas I'm not allowed to just shoot you. I quit.

BOOBIES!

The Lord of the Rings: Return of the King won 11 Oscars.

Woo Hoo! I've now have seen a best picture award winner in the theater.

Sure there were several endings, but the books had several endings.

A nice hearty fuck you to the stupid teenage cunt who talked through most of the movie. The bitch complained about the several endings as she was leaving. I asked her how the hell she would know about the endings since she talked throughout the movie. Yes, I had to give the clueless fuck the hairy eyeball several times but apparently the girl had some special needs, learning issues or something because the behavior would stop temporarily. This girl believed that if one stops an annoying behavior for 5 minutes the behavior becomes non-annoying when it is resumed. Even the stupid brat's companions told her to shut up. The tard just could not keep its mouth shut for any length of time.

It was a good movie and I enjoyed it despite the tard's best efforts. Hooray for surround sound.

Parenting lesson: Leave the tard at home. Everyone will be much happier.

BOOBIES!

This week I ran 7.01 miles and burned 907.8 calories. My weight averaged out to 166.4 pounds.

I had a meeting on Wednesday that prevented me from running that day.

I will be selling some clothes on eBay because they are too big. That is a nice statement to make about myself.

The corn cob has disappeared. I hope the squirrels are happy.

The house smells nice because Walter is making brownies for church tomorrow.

Like the new look?

Same template, different title.

I will be going out with friends tonight. We are celebrating the anniversary of our Starfleet chapter. Yes, I'm a Trekkie. A trekkie with a sense of humor so sick that she feels comfortable with mocking the misery of others. Sick, sick, sick.

I'm going to get a major karmic bitch slap if I'm not careful.

BOOBIES!

A portrait of a beautiful family.

It is a beautiful family. It is the most perfect specimen of an American family. It is the poster family. Happy, healthy and clean. It is the kind of family one only finds in a Norman Rockwell painting. The only flaw is the two headed freak baby!

Normal people might take a few pictures for private use and to help them deal with the grief in private. They wouldn't haul the whole family, including two headed freak baby, down to Wal-Mart for the family portrait special. Furthermore, normal people do not post the damn pictures on the world wide web.

I feel sorry for the other kids. What is going through their minds: Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. MY BABY SISTER HAS TWO HEADS!!!!!! OUR PARENTS ARE MAKING US TAKE PICTURES WITH THE TWO HEADED FREAK!!!!!!! THIS IS NOT RIGHT!!!!!! Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal. Everything is perfectly normal....

I know. Don't bother telling me.

There is a proliferation of web comics based on Sonic and Megaman characters. Check it out here. Right now there is 3 of them on the Comic strips Top 100. Three does not seem like a large number but these things have a way of multiplying. Soon, the web will be covered in these things. By the way, the comics suck.

The suckage of the comics is based upon a scale known only to me. On different scales the suckage quotient may differ. With the lack of filtration a lot of crap comes through but at least the crap has a chance to be heard.

There are some great comics on the web. Something Positive, You Damn Kid, Kevin and Kell for example. My own strip has an audience. I've met some of them and they seem to be pretty nice. They are too polite to let me know when one of my panels suck.

I occassionally get some criticism that says, "You suck." A statement about an aspect of my sex life does not help me produce better panels.

Sometimes I envy Randy Milholland, the artist for Something Positive. He has been on the web for a relatively short time and he is receiving a lot of attention, in terms of cons, speaking engagements and fan appreciation. Of course, he lives in a more populated section of the country and networks better with other cartoonists whereas I live 24 miles south of the middle of nowhere Texas and being an introvert not much into networking and I don't actively promote myself. I rarely participate in the web cartooning community. Actually, I'm not sure how one participates in the web cartooning community or even if one actually exists. Most importantly, his comic strip is usually funny and has an engaging story line. Milholland does deserve all the success that he is having and I hope he continues to have even more success. Really.

BOOBIES!

More @#$%! rain. It is necessary to sustain life but why can't it happen at night?

The neighborhood squirrels are being goofy. A neighbor three houses down from us puts corn on the cob on feeders for the squirrels. The squirrels don't like to eat the corn on the cob on the feeder. Instead the squirrels remove the corn cob and drag it to our front yard and then munch on it. There is a corn cob in the middle of our front yard. It will probably remain uneaten for a while since it is raining. I should move it for aesthetic reasons but then again it does provide nourishment for animals. The corn cobs do get eaten and disappear eventually.

Maybe we should put up a sign with the following disclaimer: We are not litterers. We do not eat corn on the cob and even if we did we would dispose of the corn cob in the proper manner. Squirrels are responsible for the corn cobs in our yard. We like squirrels so we are not moving the corn cobs until the corn has been eaten or the squirrels dispose of the cobs. We also don't drink Coors. Each house has been issued a trash container by the city. That is where empty packages belong. Not in our yard. Don't force us to hate you.

It took us a while to figure out the corn cob mystery. We expect cans, bottles, wrappers and other debris since we live on a corner, and our neighborhood has a fair number of litterers, but the partially eaten corn cobs had us stumped. Who the heck walks down the street munching on corn on the cob and then throws the cob on the ground? It finally became clear when I noticed a corn cob on the neighbor's feeder.

It is not clear as to why our yard is a more appealing place to eat. I'm sure the squirrels have their reasons.

If you have read this far, you will have noticed that my life is painfully boring. I like to spread pain. God bless the internet.

BOOBIES!

Sometimes clip art pisses me off. Occassionally I use clip art in my cartoons to save time and increase output (helps me stay on schedule). In the process of converting things to a web format the clip art ends up looking weird. Today's cartoon features an evil goateed mad scientist in a flowery mini dress. The mad scientist speaks with a bad French accent. Just adds to the bizarreness of the gag. That is what I tell myself because I'm too lazy to go back and try to fix it.

BOOBIES!

I feel compelled to blog but have nothing to write.

Oh @#$%!, I'm becoming one of those people who cannot stand silence! People who insist on talking despite having nothing to say. Silence is not a bad thing. I guess people fear that if their mouth stopped flapping their brain would start working.

They would begin to question everything. But then they would become depressed when they cannot do anything about everything. Some will try but ultimately it will fail. They will insist on continuing to live even though there is nothing to live for.

At this point, somebody will mention Jesus. [Insert message about Jesus providing meaning to life]

I love Jesus. Too bad a lot of his message has been corrupted.

It is Monday, I'm tired, it is cloudy outside and I'm at work and I have to be here too damn early in the morning. I'm not a morning person.

My list of irritating people:
1. People who talk just to make noise.
2. Loud people.
3. Morning people who refuse to keep their cheerfulness to themselves. I respect your preferences; I don't call you at 10:00 pm and cram my cheerfulness down your throat. Respect mine. You do better in the morning. Fine. Now, go away and shut the @#$%! up!
4. My neighbors who like to listen to Tejano music but their best sound system is in their vehicle so they crank up the vehicle sound system and open the doors. I've told these people that there is a similar technology for the house. Tejano music sucks. An unholy combination of polka and country music. You have to be really drunk to enjoy this music.
5. Cell phone drivers. Your trivial conversation is more important than the lives of everyone around you.
6. Jacked up pick up truck owners. They are lower on the list because at least they are performing a service. They are letting all women know that they have a small penis. It saves a lot of disappointment.
7. Owners of boom cars over 21 years of age. Grow the hell up.
8. Most middle aged and older women. Most are quite dull but don't realize it. They have no problem sharing the dullness. How to avoid dull middle aged and older women: join a Unitarian-Universalist church. Seriously.
9. Me. I made this list, that should tell you something. I'm an introvert. We will be next on John Ashcroft's list of enemies. It is un-American not to enjoy the constant company of other people and the endless chatter.

BOOBIES!

This week I ran 7.81 miles.

It was a beautiful day today. I bought the paperback, The Way of the Weasel. Scott Adams should have titled it, The Tao of the Weasel. It would have sold well among the new age crowd. That title is not as alliterative but the goal is to make money. I used a gift card to purchase the book.

I will be watching Secondhand Lions, tonight. Also rented Terminator 3 and Cowboy Bebop, the movie.

Nothing has fallen apart, now that I am officially 35. I did have some difficulty with my run today but that may have had something to do with skipping my Saturday run last week and not running at all the week before. I will do better next week. I always do better next week.

For two weeks, I am 2 years older than my sister. That was much cooler when I was a kid.

Harley is outside. Daisy is sleeping on the couch and Rusty is laying on the floor next to me. Rusty stinks. Salvador is in his cage chirping and cracking seeds. I fed him some egg this morning. Salvador is very disturbed by the sight of cracking eggs but does not mind eating scrambled eggs. I don't think he gets the connection. I fed a bird, bird abortion.

Bird flu has been found in south Texas chicken flock. Mad cow, Bird flu and mercury in fish. It all makes vegetarianism more attractive. I hope plants don't aquire some disease dangerous to humans. We would be screwed or at least forced to subsist on Cheetos and Twinkies. Mmmm, Cheetos and Twinkies.

BOOBIES!

I need to do something about the title of this blog. It is nicely alliterative even though its focus has expanded.

I will be 35 years old tomorrow. The cable company will take the MTV away and TV and movie producers will no longer be interested in appealing to me. I will no longer exist in the eyes of marketers. Oh well.

Something about 5/10 birthdays compels me to take inventory. The UUA still considers me a young adult. There is another reason to become an Unitarian-Universalist.

A partial inventory of trivial things and numbers that have shaped my life:
I've lived in 20 different dwellings. I attended 6 elementary schools, 4 middle schools, 1 high school, 2 community colleges and 1 university. Attended 5 churches regularly.

I've earned a degree from the university. I've made honor roll twice in High School and made Dean's List once at the university.

5 relatives are no longer living. 4 grandparents and 1 aunt.

There have been 7 family pets:4 cats, 3 dogs. I've owned 6 pets: 1 bird, 1 fish, 4 dogs. 3 of the dogs and the bird are still alive.

I've been married for almost 10 years. I've had my current job for almost 8 years. I've been in the workforce since 1987. I've worked for McDonalds and Burger King. I've been employed by 14 different organizations.

I attempted to learn two foreign languages: Japanese and Spanish. I've been to one foreign country, The Bahamas.

I have played the clarinet and tenor saxophone. Neither very well.

I have flown on airplanes, rode horses, rode on the Goodyear Blimp and traveled on a cruise ship. The largest fish I've ever caught weighed 6 pounds. I've spoken in front of an audience 6 times.

My tonsils are gone and my tubes are tied but I still have my appendix. I had my first cavity filled this year. I've never had stiches nor a broken bone. I've had a nose bleed once.

I've bench pressed 75 pounds, curled 50 pounds, leg pressed 200 pounds and ran in a marathon. Not in the same day.

I've read the Bible, Huckleberry Finn and the Grapes of Wrath, twice. I tried to read James Joyce, Joseph Conrad and William Faulkner. My attempts failed. I've read 3 James Michener novels, the Hitchhikers series, the Lord of the Rings, Gone With the Wind and the Dune series written by Frank Herbert. Currently reading the Tibetan Book of the Dead.

I own over 100 comic books and Hot Wheels. I don't own a hair dryer, curlers, coffee maker, tea kettle nor a Dutch oven. I own one pair of pumps - black. I've dyed my hair twice and had it permed once.

I've seen all the Star Trek and Star Wars movies. I've never seen a Best Picture Academy Award winner in a movie theater. I've drawn over 750 cartoons. I've watched over 750 cartoons.

Kansas City is the farthest north I've ever travelled.

I gave blood today. My 13th pint. Blood pressure 118/70.

I got a t-shirt, Mardi Gras beads (I didn't have to show my tits), a birthday pin and a mousepad. I needed a new mouspad.

My latest issue of Bird Talk arrived. It is the 2nd annual baby bird issue. It included a photo contest of baby birds. I love Salvador and I love birds but baby birds are ugly. The hatchings anyway. They are not so cute until they get some feathers. Parrots are not like chickens. Parrots are not cute fuzzy things when they hatch.

The most important command your bird should know is "Step Up" The second most important command is "Shut the hell up already!"

Two days until 35.

BOOBIES!

Yesterday, Harley has so much slobber on his face that he looked like he had been in a porn movie.

The dogs are enjoying the pleasant weather. Yesterday evening, all the neighborhood kids were out playing in the streets. The kids did not move quickly to get out of the way of traffic. I think the dogs were barking to cheer on the cars.

My cough is sounding better, only because I've been practicing (ba-da-bump).

Last time I checked, there are 50 states in the United States. Why is John Kerry being annointed the Democratic Party nominee when less than half of the states have held primaries or caucuses? So much for the democratic process. I hope there is a backlash against this annointing and Kerry and the media receive the bitch-slap that they richly deserve for being so arrogant and so sure about the nominee so soon in the process. I think Edwards can pull off an upset.

I've been supporting Howard Dean. We'll see what happens. A lot of analysts have been wondering what happened to Dean's campaign. My theory: Dean represents a real chance for change in Washington. A lot of people are afraid of real change and neither major political party wants real change. There is a lot of lip service given to change but nothing really happens unless it is violent or too loud to ignore. Getting the level of attention needed to make a genuine change is too much effort for the average American.

Can Kerry beat Bush? Probably not. The Bush camp only has to trot out two words, "Massachusetts Liberal", to demonize Kerry. The first George Bush did that successfully against Dukakis.

Those of you residing outside of the U.S. might be asking yourselves, "Are Americans are that stupid to fall for that tactic?" The answer, regretfully, is yes.

Those of you residing in the U.S. might be asking yourselves, "If she thinks so many of us are stupid, why doesn't she go to another country?" I love living in the United States. Besides other countries probably have the same proportion of idiots as the U.S. I only have daily contact with the idiots in the U.S. and the idiots seem to wield too much power and influence. I don't often hear about idiots populating other countries.

Despite our flaws, the United States is a great country to live in. We can be loud, obnoxius, a bit too proud of our ignorance, consume too much, but when there is a need we are among the most generous people in the world. Our diversity is striking and our natural landscape is amazing. As you can see in the entry below, I've barely scratched the surface of this country. Hell, I've haven't visted the whole state that I live in.

The U.S. is full of ignorant assholes but they are familiar ignorant assholes.

create your own visited states map
or write about it on the open travel guide

An updated map of states that I have visited. See, I did travel above the Mason-Dixon Line!

Once again the female breast runs amok during a sporting event!
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S A BOOBIE!!!!!!!

Run for your lives! Fortunately, a seven second delay saved us from the horror of Beyonce's Boobie. I'm so glad the media is concerned about our safety and well being.

While the partially exposed boobie was being shown on CNN, the ticker that runs on the bottom informed us that 2 more soldiers were killed in Iraq by a roadside bomb. Two soldiers sent there for questionable reasons.

The important thing here is that the public was exposed to a partially bare female breast.

That is why John Stewart, a fake journalist, has more respect from the American public than real journalists.

BOOBIES!

Still hacking up lung. Coughing does a lot for silent group meditation. As a group we are used to a train coming by at least once during the meditation hour. I'm not a Zen Master or anything. I just bang the gong.

Really, that is the extent of my leadership. I open the church and bang the gong.

There are no altered mind states during meditation. It is just sitting and being. That is hard for a lot of people. I have no problem being silent in an external sense but my mind can be quite noisy. That is the part that requires discipline. There is a reason is called practice.

The question that comes up in my mind a lot is, "Does the Dalai Lama fart?" Actually does he fart while in meditation? I haven't had that experience yet. I've had some close calls. It would just be interesting to find out how one of our living holy people handles the extreme earthiness of farting. Jesus probably farted and laughed about it. The Dalai Lama would probably laugh too.

The dogs got to enjoy some sunshine today. It was cloudy for 5 days in a row.

Salvador is standing on my shoulder shrieking in my ear. He does not understand that I cannot stroke his head and type at the same time. He was whistling some show tunes earlier today. The preening, the show tunes, the cattiness, I don't know.

I'm spending Valentine's Day hacking up my lungs! Oh joy.

There are plans for a romantic evening. I'll take some cough syrup beforehand.

I'm down to 165.5 pounds. According to most BMI calculators that is my ideal weight. I'm pleased. About 5 years ago I was 215 pounds. Exercise and portion control. Mostly exercise because I like food.

Some people expect magic things to happen with their lives once the excess weight is off. Nothing magical happens in terms of riches, fulfillment and such. You are just healthier and weigh less. Weight loss won't solve everything but it makes dealing with some things easier. People do treat you better, even though you have not changed much in terms of personality. If you are a fat asshole then losing weight is only going to make you a thin asshole. After losing weight other people will just call you an asshole rather than a fat asshole.

Getting down to a healthier weight is a long term project. You have to start somewhere and stick with it. For some people it is not just the weight it is being able to do things without keeling over. There are some heavy looking people that can run marathons, compete in triathlons and do other mighty physical feats. There are some people who look fat but are very fit. Of course, if you are one of those fat people sitting around on their ass while stuffing your face then you are not one of the fat and fit. The fat and fit are out doing stuff and moving around. Don't use the fat and fit to justify your lifestyle.

Listening to DH run the vacuum cleaner.

Dogs are scared of the vacuum cleaner. Rusty has taken refuge under my desk and the Bassets have taken refuge on the couch.

Today is heartworm preventative day. Everyone gulped down their pills. The nice peanut butter fudge wrapping around the pills helped a lot.

Salvador is preening. Always preening. Sometimes, I think he is a gay man in a bird suit.

Off to cough up another chunk of lung.

fphomepage

Check out this freak show. Be sure to have some mental bleach handy when viewing the "erotica" pictures.

Listening to the Lounge Station on Radio@Netscape Plus.
Current song: You're the Top by Dean Elliot & His Big Band.

Just finished the Order of Service for this Sunday. Why yes, I go to church. A Unitarian-Universalist church.

What is Unitarian-Universalism? It is only the coolest, hippest, swankiest religion around. Whoa, a little too much lounge music. Actually, it is a over 500 year old religion with roots in Christianity that also draws upon the wisdom and traditions of other religions. To find a Unitarian-Universalist church near you vist http://www.uua.org. We call ourselves UUs because Unitarian-Universalist is just too long.

Our churches run a special for Catholics during Lent. Give up Catholicism for Lent and try us for 40 days. If you are not happy with UU after 40 days then you are free to return to Catholicism without any obligation nor condemnation.

Current Song: Stranger in Paradise by Jack Jones.

Current state: Coughing up my lungs between paragraphs.
Dogs: Rusty's breath really stinks, Harley is pissed off at our attempts to trim his toenails, Daisy is sleeping.
Bird: Sleeping quietly in his cage.

Mood: Stuffy but buzzing on Alka-Seltzer Plus Nighttime
Dog Moods: Sleeping, sleeping and sleeping
Feet: Cold
Watch: Timex Ironman Triathlon
Feet: Warming up now that Rusty is laying on them
Bird: screeching
Shirt: Purple with pinstripes
Weather: sucks
Listening to nothing but the whirring of computers.
Poetry: Feh

Cool! A real dog won the Westminister Kennel Club Dog Show. Way to go, Josh the Newfoundland.

Now is the time to stop giving show poodles those ridiculous haircuts.

I missed seeing the Hound Group. The Bassets did not care and they prefer watching Most Extreme Elimination Challenge anyway. Why don't the Japanese export the drugs they are taking?

Why is television for men much more interesting than television for women? I'll take Spike over Lifetime any day.

Cough, cough

Rant:

Some woman in Tennessee (a state that I've come close to visiting) is suing Janet Jackson, Justin Timberlake, MTV, CBS and Viacom over the little bit of nipple. She claims it has caused her embarrassment, pain and suffering. She hopes this becomes a class action suit worth billions of dollars.

I want to sue the woman in Tennessee for causing me embarrassment, a headache and suffering caused by the fact that she lives in the same country and that she is causing even more embarrassment to America. I don't want money. I just want to beat her with a cricket bat for 2 minutes.

I think the United States is the junior high kid of the world community, with the way we act about nudity. It was, at most, 10% of a nipple. Heh, heh, heh, nipple.

What about the children? @#$%! the children! God forbid, a parent has to take time to answer what ever question their child might have had about the moment.

I love America but hate a lot of her residents.

create your own visited states map
or write about it on the open travel guide

I've been to the Bahamas but I did not want to have a map of the world with just two countries in red. In my mind I've been to many other places.